i am 15 years old and my duedate is 3 days away i have paid all the exspenses by myself because he refuses to help me or get a job. i have paid the money with my college fund and money i have saved since i was a kid. i asked him to pay half on the bills i have recived. which would only be 690.00. he said that my dad and mom shopuld pay for it since they are "rich". but i feel like it should be our responsibilty.i told him that i don't think he should see the baby if he is not going to help with the expenses. can he make me let him see the baby? he and his mom want to get custody c an they take my baby away? the way there going to do yhat is by telling the police that my dad has molested me.and my baby will be living with me and my parents. they somtimes don't have heat. it is -10 outside write now. what should i do
2007-02-10 06:20:33 · 17 answers · asked by chloe21307 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
No honey they are not going to take your child away. It is very rare that the courts take a child away from the mother unless she is unfit. If you and your parents have a good home and enough income to support the both of you then you are ok. And as far as child support they will make either him or his parents give you child support if there is a paternity test to prove that he is the father. And unless you have a custody battle to where he would get half parental rights then it is your choice if he sees the child or not. If he cant afford heat then he cant afford an attorney to get half custody.
2007-02-10 06:33:37 · answer #1 · answered by lorisbarbie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will have to establish paternity, at the same time you are under the age of consent and I'm not sure about every state but he may also be under the age of consent which means he and possibly both of you are in jeapardy of statutory rape -- a criminal offense. If he is unwilling to claim paternity then you may need a court order to compel DNA testing which isn't an automatic thing based on your say so he has rights and avenues to fight that starting with claiming he never had sex. You can use the statutory rape law as leverage to get him to admit paternity in order to avoid a rape investigation and criminal charges but in addition to just getting me to admit paternity at birth and sign a birth certificate you should also get him to voluntarily take a DNA test (if you are sure he's the father) so that he can't back out of responsibility later by claiming he was a minor when he admited paternity did it out of a false sense of love and didn't understand it creating a whole new set of legal issues later. Once his paternity to the child is legally established then he's legally responsible to provide finacial support for the child until the child reaches 18. However, the formula for child support varies from state to state but often the fact that he has little to no income now means he wont have to pay much child support and you will have to go back to court as the years progress to get the support increased as his income increases over the next 18 years. Some states allow for the parents of a minor to be obligated to pay child support on behalf the minor parent until he reaches 18 or possibly 21. Again, if his parents dont have much income it wont be much. If they do have income and are resonable responsible parents who wish to protect their son from possible criminal prosecution they will likely agree to reasonable support demands without taking the case before a judge. Right now it's best to consult a lawyer, contact a woman's advocacy group or even a women's clinic and they will likely advise you more accurately on your rights under the law where you live and provide you contact information for lawyers who specialize in such cases and even ones that will work on your behalf for free or at rates you can afford.
2016-05-25 03:08:48 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the guy who answered you first is very wrong. He has every right to see his child, in fact he may be awarded very liberal visitation even if he doesn't pay a dime of support.
The courts do not deal with the issues together because they're tired of one parent interfering in the relationship due to anger about money.
If your father molested you then YOU should be concerned about living in that home with your child. You can request assistance from Childrens Services here... They can assist you with finding your own apartment, medical care for you and your child, etc.
They don't want to see you keeping the child in the same home with the man who molested you. Go talk to them. Their purpose is to protect children and YOU are a child. They will assist you.
Child Support - Yes, child services will assist you in filing a paternity suit. This alleges that he is the father and he will have to answer Yes or No. If he decides to answer No, then they will order a DNA test be done. Once they get evidence that he IS the father, they will issue an order of support and he will have to pay the courts and the court will record his payment and send you a check.
2007-02-10 07:43:33 · answer #3 · answered by ~Me~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Visitation and child support are two different issues. You should be able to get a child support order from him. I know in some states once someone becomes a parent they automatically become emancipated and are considered an adult but you'll have to check in your state.
You can't withhold visitation if he doesn't pay, nor does paying automatically entitle him to visitation. You need to get a legal document about visitation as soon as possible. You can even do it without a lawyer by writing something up and getting it notarized (but since its not a legal court document I don't think you could enforce it through the police).
Don't let him get away with paying the support directly to you, make him send it through the state, that way they have documentation of if/when it iwas paid in case you have to get his wages garnished to get the money.
If they are making threats against you or the baby, you need to document them all. Even better if you can get them in writing (email, letters) or audially (voicemail or hidden microphone). Just document the heck out of anything they do or say to make your case stronger.
2007-02-10 06:30:32 · answer #4 · answered by Heather Y 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first off, if he wants custody of the baby so bad, then how come he hasn't helped with the pre-natal care? Be sure that you have ALL your receipts from the hospital and stuff, ok? Also, allegations of sexual abuse does not automatically lead to a conviction. If your father never abused you, and you tell them multiple times that he didn't, and there is no evidence of any abuse, then all they can do is investigate.
Your parents sometimes don't have heat? Why?
You're obviously invested in making sure your baby has a good life. If you can prove that the father is irresponsible and hasn't helped you at all during your pregnancy, that will make your case against him stronger.
Document EVERYTHING. Make sure you have witnesses-- your parents, some friends even. If it goes to court, make sure that your witnesses write out and sign statements for you, and get them notarized. Most banks have notaries, and I think its relatively cheap to get things notarized.
Good luck sweetie!
2007-02-10 06:30:18 · answer #5 · answered by youdontneedtoknow 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They can't just say that your dad molested you. They need evidence. And if he isn't paying child support, he has no right to see the child. While your in labor, after you have the baby, and at your house, your parents should keep him out. And if he wants to pay child support, he and his mom can see the baby. Not shared custody, not even partial custody, just monitored visitation (monitored by you AND a parent).
2007-02-10 06:31:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can't take the baby! don't let him and his mom scare you! You are 15 years old! (too young) but, have your parents sign up for medical for you and the baby! make sure you open a case to receive medical attention for both of you and also for you to get food stamps and money to take care of the baby. He won't pay any child support now but once he turns 18th and this case is open, the state will start collecting the money for you! Good luck and get rid of that looser! he won't be a good dad!! as you get older you will find a real man! Take care of both of you!
2007-02-10 11:44:30 · answer #7 · answered by Deyla C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend went through this. If he or his family want visitation rights then they HAVE to pay child support, but since he is under 18 his parents have to pay the child support until he is 18. Once he is 18 the responsibility is his. So if his parents decide to pay it and then he turns 18 and decides he doesn't want to pay it, then they will rovoke is visitation rights.
2007-02-10 07:12:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is consult a lawyer and/or a family counselor to see if they can give you more information. I would for sure think that since you are underage your parents would have to be the ones taking most of the responsibility in finding out these questions for you.
***Good Luck***
2007-02-10 06:51:52 · answer #9 · answered by msheatherd28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hire a laywer and get them to throw his *** in court and get the child support. If he dont pay and the court told him too, there is a website and help line who will jerk his *** in shape and pay it. I think its call Kids Support or Support Kids.. its one of those. My mom used it on my dad and they made him pay and told him basically do it or go to jail. So.. my advice get a laywer now and get it from him. Plus hes not too young to pay it. He jsut have to grow up and get a job.
2007-02-10 10:03:23 · answer #10 · answered by Samantha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋