Sorry if this is long. Something confusing happened to a friend of mine, Z and her boyfriend, Y. They were talking on the phone. Apparently, Y got all serious and started asking her if she had issues with gays. Then told her that he think he's gay. And then, he hung up.
So Z sees this as Y's way of breaking up with her. She has no issues with Y being gay and intended to remain friends. But the next day (at 6 am in the morning no less) Y e-mailed her and asked her if she wants to go on a 'morning run' with him.
Z didn't want to appear homophobic so she said yes. So they met up and conversed as per normal, as if they hadn't broken up at all.
They still meet up regularly and most of Y's friends still think they're together. Y didn't even bother to correct them (except to this dude, but I don't know him so I don't know what's his relationship with Y). So Z tried to clear things up with Y. But every time she bring up the subject he'll get all evasive.
What does this all mean?
2007-02-10 05:14:45 · 5 answers · asked by Diamond 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I understand that ur friend must be having an awful time with all this, but for the guy mustn't be easy either...the process of defining the sexual identity and accept it can be way hard and also confusing.
I'm sure he'll talk to ur friend when he figures it out...until then, if ur friend feels bad being with him, she should tell him that she's ok about homosexuality but she needs some time out to get used to the new situation.
i hope this helps u and ur friend, good luck
2007-02-10 05:27:15 · answer #1 · answered by moody123 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When people begin to tell others about being gay/bi/trans, whatever, they tend to tell the people closest to them first, and the general public second.
Though this is not always the case, he may have told her because he really likes her and wanted to tell her so he could be himself around her. But he may not be ready for everyone and their dog to know, so if she values his friendship she should stop trying to bring out that information in public. If he brings it up, she can certainly go along with it, but she should let him decide who knows and who doesn't. It's not up to her to decide that for him.
When I came out, I did it to my friends first, moved 3000 miles away and explored where I didn't have to worry about anyone finding out by accident, and then when i moved back to my hometown a couple of years later I told my family and everyone else. It's a process and for each person it's different and shouldn't be forced.
2007-02-14 18:18:26 · answer #2 · answered by Matt S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may be showing my age, but what is a "morning run"? If morning run just means a jog in the morning than I would say that the fella is unsure and/or uncomfortable with his sexual preference and wants to hang out with your friend because he genuinely likes her and wants a sense of normalcy (not thinking of his questionable sexuality).
2007-02-10 13:36:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If Z is bringing up Y's sexuality in public, he may be trying to dodge the conversation in public because he's scared of getting outed. Just a thought.
2007-02-11 01:17:44 · answer #4 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SHE NEEDS TO GET OUT NOW IF HE SAYS HES GAY WELL HELLO THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS . EVEN THOUGH YOU CAN STILL BE FRIENDS NOT LOVERS. BUT DO NOT WAIT AROUND HE MAY CHANGE HIS MIND BUT WILL GO BACK TO WHERE HIS GAY FEELINGS ARE. BEING JUST FRIENDS IS THE ANSWER.
2007-02-10 13:22:53 · answer #5 · answered by mrmspiper 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋