my mom is driving me insane im 17 and still live at home.... but we had a fight last night about her actions.. this is how it goes. she has been married and divorced 3 times to 3 different guys. and inbetween them, she's dated sooo many guys. i can name them all..in order.. and theres ...theres over 14 guys in the span of just a few years. she brings them into the house and they hang around all the time and im sick of it. her 3rd divorce was final 3 days ago and she is already seeing two guys. .. we got into a fight last night because i said "your boyfriend is on the phone" and she goes "you embarrassed me ..im ashamed of you " and i exploded. i said instead of thinking about me and my actions, you should think about how many boyfriends you've brought into this house when you JUST got divorced, and how slutty you're acting and what kind of example you're setting!" did i do the right thing? im just sick of it. how do i deal with this and what more can i do? PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!
2007-02-10 02:16:41 · 12 answers · asked by lil miss agony 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
and yes i do have a dad..but his house ust isnt ....theres not enough troom for me.. and im not the only child
2007-02-10 02:31:32 · update #1
and to the crazy bi chick... you obviously need help... and...yes they do.. they do last forever..or atleast they should..if you arenta whore.. or bisexual...since YOU obviously know how to get relationships to work..what went wrong in yours that you went bi... HUH???
2007-02-10 02:33:14 · update #2
I don't really think it matters to your mom how you feel about her relationships. I think you need to just bide your time until you turn 18 and are able to get out on your own and can have a stable life. Your mom won't stop her behavior, it seems like she is insecure and has to have a man on her arm at all times but picks the wrong ones every time. Once you are out on your own, you have a choice, you don't have to deal with your moms behavior nor her boyfriends and you can tell her so but until then, just hang in there. I'm a mom, I have 5 kids and my husband and I have been married for almost 21 years and I couldn't imagine how my kids would feel if I was like that. I'm more than happy to be there for support when you need it.
2007-02-10 02:44:29 · answer #1 · answered by Nina C 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but I haven't really got much of an answer, at least nothing that helps much NOW. Your mother will do as she pleases, and obviously, she doesn't have both oars in the water. You can't do anything about that. I'm sure you'd go to live with your Father, if that was a reasonable option, and since you haven't, you probably will just have to live with the situation until you reach 18. Then at least, YOU can make decisions for yourself. Do nothing until you finish high school. Then, IF it is too lousy, it is possible for you to make it on your own, though of course, it's awfully young to do that. Try talking to a school counselor, or a minister. They can at least help you with options in your area. Good luck, and remember, there isn't anything that's too bad, if you survive it. Build a great life for yourself, and this crap will seem trivial someday. By the way, I pity your Mom, she's losing you, and no amount of bar friends will make up for that.
2007-02-10 11:05:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
After all these years and men going and coming, you are just know getting upset? You have to realizer your mother has a mental illness. Get caller ID or your own phone and do not answer the phone when it is your boyfriends. Make your room your haven or find somewhere else to go (grandmothers, aunts, friends) You are obvioulsy a smart cookie and her "example" has not rubbed off on you. No use in name calling, she already knows it. Don't waste your breath on her. Put your energy towards getting a good education and getting out of the house (perhaps you will be going away to collage soon). Soon you will be able to distance yourself from her and live a normal life.
2007-02-10 10:58:04 · answer #3 · answered by lily 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hang on for a few more months. You are almost 18, and can move out at that point.
You are not going to be able to convince your mother to change her lifestyle. She obviously has low self-esteem and needs lots of men to make her feel worthwhile. You can learn a lesson from this. If you don't want your children to grow up as you have, then choose your spouse carefully and stick with them. If you have to divorce, the proper thing to do for the child(ren) is to stay single, not date at all, until the children are over 18. This is a huge sacrifice, but your children will thank you for it later. You don't want them to grow up like you did, do you?
2007-02-10 10:41:55 · answer #4 · answered by J.R. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry your Mom is so out of control. You sound more grown up than she is, and I think you have a right to be disappointed in her. However, yelling and provoking arguements isn't going help matters. She's putting her love life ahead of raising her children, which unfortunately isn't uncommon. You could have a calm, serious talk with her, letting her know how you feel, but I seriously doubt she's going to change. Hang in there, you are almost old enough to move out and start making your own life....
2007-02-10 10:37:46 · answer #5 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
While I personally agree with you about your mother's behavior, the fact is, it's not your place to tell her what to do or how to do it in her own home. Talk to your mother, and see if she'll let you go live with a friend or relative. Be honest about your feelings and why you want to leave the situation. If she won't agree, then just hang in there, you'll soon be old enough to leave home without her permission. Best of luck!
2007-02-10 10:26:51 · answer #6 · answered by grandm 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Guess what, as long as you're living in your mother's house you have to play by her rules. That's just the way it is. If she wants to see 10 guys at once then she has the right to do so, if you agree or not. Why not move out on your own, pay your own rent, buy you own car, feed yourself, get your own insurance, buy your clothes, buy gas for your car, etc, etc, and then you won't have to put up with your mother.
2007-02-10 10:38:04 · answer #7 · answered by Jim F 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your Mom obviously has a problem sticking with one man, but that doesn't make her any less your Mom. You told her that she is setting a bad example, if you know that, then you wont follow that example. Unless you and her can get some kind of family counseling, there isn't much you can do.
2007-02-10 10:33:02 · answer #8 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing because that is not a good example she is setting.. if you can't take it then move. do you have a father you can go stay with? or a relative? Your mother needs help, that is not something you can do, so you need to try to help her get help or just love your mother. the bible says honor thy mother and thy father.... Then you need to seek some help because all this is taking a toll on you and it's eventually going to start effecting your relationships. this is something you and your mother can do together or apart... but i think you guys should do it together.. Are you the only child?
2007-02-10 10:29:42 · answer #9 · answered by Shonda 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I hope you are saving all your money from your job so you can get out of there the moment you turn 18.
Can't you stay at your dad's?
2007-02-10 11:36:30 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋