List five reasons why it is great to be a man?

Question

Looking for some funny thoughts and observations.

Answer 1

1) no periods
2) don't have to dress up when we go out, whereas women will get made fun of if they don't get all made up
3) don't have to grocery shop if you're married as women love any kind of shopping and will do it for you (i think)
4) more naturally physically stronger?
5) able to recognize the splendor that is women

Answer 2

Women. Who needs another reason?
Reasons why it might not be so good to be a man could include -
The way the petrol tank on a motorbike goes up, in front of the seat; no sudden stopping, Please!!
Shaving cuts that wont stop bleeding.
Metro-sexual fashion; jeans designed to make me look ridiculous, and forty, at the same time.
Being teased for 'Squealing like a girl'. Well, there was a snake. And it looked pretty big, to me. And round here, the snakes aren't only deadly, but don't take a lot of provocation before things turn ugly. I got scared. And that was the first sound that came out.
Look, you're bound to get plenty of macho BS 'positives', I though I'd throw in a couple of fairly funny 'negatives'. Kind of balance things.

Answer 3

Some of the things I enjoyabout being a man:

The view while making love to a beautiful woman,

Children grant authority if you look serious,

Putting on a couple pounds without caring too much,

Working on cars,

Being the strongest person in my family.

Answer 4

1) You don't get your period.
2) You don't have to go through childbirth.
3) You can shave your head bald and still look good. On the flipside,
you don't have to shave anything else, and still look good.
4) You don't have to worry about who is going to pay the tab.
5) You can masturbate just about anywhere.

Answer 5

1) it is socially acceptable to be in public (as long as your not at work or inside a public building) to be topless
2) Society has lower standards for how a guy needs to act
3) Beer
4) We dont have a 10lb anything come out of anywhere
5) The inside-out rule (if you wore it yesterday, turn it inside out and your ready to go)

Answer 6

Having the stupidity of a man has won me alot of bets.

Answer 7

WHY IT'S GREAT TO BE A GUY

1. Your orgasms are real. Always.
2. Your last name stays put.
3. The garage is all yours.
4. Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You don't have to curl up next to a hairy *** every night.
7. Chocolate is just another snack.
8. You can be president.
9. You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
10. Foreplay is optional.
11. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
12. Your *** is never a factor in a job interview.
13. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
14. You don't give a rat's *** if someone notices your new haircut.
15. The world is your urinal.
16. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
17. You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.
18. Same work... more pay.
19. Wrinkles add character.
20. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
21. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
22. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
23. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
24. Princess Di's death was just another obituary.
25. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
26. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
27. Porn movies are designed with you in mind.
28. Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.
29. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
30. One mood, all the time.

WHY IT'S GOOD TO BE A WOMAN:

1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
3. We never ejaculate prematurely.
4. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
5. When we buy a vibrator, it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll, it's pathetic.
6. Our boyfriend's/husband's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous; guys look like complete idiots in ours.
7. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
8. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
9. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
10. Taxis stop for us.
11. Men die earlier so we get to cash in on the life insurance policy.
12. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
13. Free drinks. Free dinners. Free movies. You get the point.
14. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
15. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
16. We know THE TRUTH about whether size matters.
17. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
18. If we have sex with someone and don't call them the next day, we're not the devil.
19. Condoms make no significant difference in our enjoyment of sex.
20. If we're not making enough money, we can blame the glass ceiling.
21. Nothing crucial can be cut off with one clean sweep.
22. It's possible to live our entire lives without ever taking a group shower.
23. No fashion faux pas we make could rival the Speedo.
24. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
25. If we cheat on our spouses, people assume it's because we're being emotionally neglected.
26. WE never have to wonder if HIS orgasm was real.
27. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
28. We can congratulate a teammate without having to ever touch her ***.
29. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
30. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
31. If we're dumb, there are still people who will find it cute.
32. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
33. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
34. We have an excuse to be a total ***** at least once a month.
35. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
36. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
37. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
38. Gay waiters don't make us uncomfortable.
39. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
40. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
41. We'll never discover we've been duped by a Wonderbra.
42. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
43. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

Answer 8

masterbation its a good work out instead of having some thing do it for you, dont have to shave all over except some areas, dont have to give birth thank god, dont have to put on make up every day, and we dont have to worry about bleeding in certain areas

Answer 9

1) because it is easy to have an orgasm
2) because you don't have to shave if you don't want to and it is still socially acceptable.
3) because you can take your shirt off when it is hot.
4) because you should be happy to be who you are.

and finally ...

5) because you have the great honor of marrying a WOMAN!

How's that?

(The pee standing up one is good too)

Answer 10

First you have a dick - an its nice to have one.
Second Men ruled the world and not women.
Third Men don't get preggy.
Fourth Men are physically strong compared to women.
last......