Long story short... I'm in the middle of a divorce and fell in love with another woman. Got her pregnant and was scared so had an abortion. Felt guilty and cursed so got pregnant again and now we're having the baby. Still technically married. I love the new girl so much, never felt this way before... BUT... Now I'm questioning my feelings towards her and feel like she is not putting back into our relationship. It seems like once she "landed" me, she stopped caring about our relationship. She is just rude to me and acts like I'm not needed in her life. I'm really scared and lonely and don't know what to do. Should I cut my losses and get out and find someone else as a single parent or should I suck it up in a bad relationship and stick it out. I have one failed marriage under my belt and don't really want another.
2007-02-09 13:43:27 · 8 answers · asked by wangchung 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I honestly don't know how the new girl had an abortion and took you back and got pregnant again. You are putting this poor girl through hell.......and now you are thinking about dumping her! Instead of asking what you want, ask her what she wants You owe it to her and the baby. I don't see where you have any losses to cut. You said you love this girl very much, so go to a counselor and get some help before you really do loose both women and baby. My heart goes out to your baby.
2007-02-09 13:58:25 · answer #1 · answered by auntkarendjjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to her. I'm betting that her anger and rudeness is stemming from the abortion. She probably blames you in some ways for it, and is having a hard time coping. Even if you chose to abort your own child, it's still a child that you could have loved and cherished, and there is still loss associated with it. You think this baby is going to replace the one you two decided to get rid of, GET REAL. You seem to have difficulties making good life decisions. Decide RIGHT NOW to begin making good, manly decisions. Get your life in order, get the divorce finalized. Do you have any other kids? Make your kids your priorities, not your love life.
2007-02-09 13:49:40 · answer #2 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Think of it from her point of view. Her question might say:
I'm so confused. What do you think?
I'm involved with a man who's still technically married to another woman. I'm pregnant with his child for the second time. The first time, he expressed fear so I had an abortion. Then he expressed guilt so we're planning to have this baby. I feel like he's manipulating me and I'm questioning my feelings toward him.
The two of you need to talk about your feelings and your relationship. And the slowness of your divorce. Yes, it all sounds pretty rocky.
2007-02-09 13:54:21 · answer #3 · answered by Wise Advice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a child along the way. When you become a father, you need to step up, take responsibility and raise the child the best way you know how. "Cutting your losses" means that you won't be there for your child, that you will permit others, perhaps another man to raise your child for you. The baby means sacrifice, it means putting your personal interests on the back burner and constructing a life around your offspring. But its well worth it, you will love your child, and in turn they will pass that love and hard work down to the next generation. That's about as close to the meaning of life as we mortals can understand.
2007-02-09 13:53:27 · answer #4 · answered by Paul 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Buddy, you're just irresponsible and confused. Now you want others to decide what to do for you. you should've stayed from this girl until you were divorced. Like i'm doing right now. As for her anger, It might be because she was forced to have an abortion she didn't want to. So that makes you twice the loser.
2007-02-09 14:13:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly she could be acting b!tchy just because she is pregnant. With my 1st child I was meaner than hell. However in the future no matter what you decide to do with this woman, you need to wait to start one relationship until the first one is totally over with.
2007-02-09 13:50:06 · answer #6 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes women's hormones change and it is worse for some. Maybe she is one of those. Try sticking it out and see how things go . as she get further along maybe things will get better.
2007-02-09 14:03:17 · answer #7 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if i were you....id fire up a big joint then go to white castle
2007-02-09 13:49:37 · answer #8 · answered by pharoah_the_midget 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋