and ended up disabled, would you stay and look after him/her out of a sense of duty, or because it doesn't matter what happens to them both physically and emotionally (because such a thing would change them emotionally too), you would still need them in your life and want to be with them what ever?
i ask because every person i've thought i was in love with, i've asked this question to myself, and duty is the answer i always seem to come up with.
your thoughts? and how have relationships worked out for you?
2007-02-09 06:34:18 · 15 answers · asked by sofiarose 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
'if you love a person it is your duty' really doesn't cut it for me. i'm talking about something that you feel inside that removes all sense of duty and obligation from the situation.
2007-02-09 06:59:31 · update #1
The only accident that would render me no longer married to my wife would be one that killed her. I wouldn't leave her for a disability, no matter how severe.
I hope it never happens, though.
2007-02-09 06:41:50 · answer #1 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you really care about the person you will be there for them because you love them not out of duty. If you think it is your duty then you really don't love them. It just sounds off that you would take care of someone you're with because you feel like it's your duty as their partner to take care of them. I'd look at it this way; if I got hurt would I want them to take care of me because they felt bad for me or because they wanted to help me get better and help me through everything. I'm just that kind of person though. I like to help people and I don't feel obligated to help anyone I just do it because I want to. But this is a good question to ask someone or yourself to see if you really care about them as much as you or they think. so far as relationships I thought I loved them but I didn't and they were the same way.
2007-02-09 15:02:35 · answer #2 · answered by angelicasongs 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fucose_man expressed my sentiments perfectly. My wife and I have built such a bond of love and respect that I would care for her even if she was disabled, disfigured, or had a chronic or fatal disease. I know she would do the same for me. It's partly a sense of duty, partly a sense of the value of keeping one's marriage vows, but mostly it's because she's an essential part of my life and I couldn't do otherwise.
2007-02-09 15:00:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think ifthe relationship was a strong one I would stay and care for him both out of love and duty. But I think as time went on I would probably want some kind of physical and emotional fulfillment too and I don't think that would be wrong.
Unfortunately If I had an 'affair' I think I would be judged harshly because I am a woman. I think most people would forgive that in a man though....
2007-02-09 14:43:25 · answer #4 · answered by ragdoll 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Personally? I'd stay. I love my other half, whether he is able or disabled. I'm not saying I think people who would go are bad or wrong, just in my case, we've been there for each other through thick and thin, and I don't see that this situation would be that different.
I wouldn't stay through a feeling of duty, just love!
2007-02-09 14:39:37 · answer #5 · answered by lululaluau 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you love someone, obligation and duty is not even a factor. I would not have to think about whether I could stay and take care of him I would just do it no question.
2007-02-09 16:27:41 · answer #6 · answered by Smoochy Poochy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I will always love and care for my husband, whatever happens, I know if he gets dementia and turn mean when he gets old, I can take care of him through it. it wouldn't be easy, I've cared for his grandfather through it, and he was mean and ridiculous and demanding, and I don't even love him, never knew him when he was the good man Granny would tell me about...
Love conquers all, a sense of duty will only get you so far before bitterness and resentment begin.
2007-02-09 14:44:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
i'd stay and take care of him because this is THE GUY the guy i wont to be with no matter what the guy i'd swap place's with if i could the guy i'd want to take care of in old age i'd stay because i love him i don't do the duty thing
2007-02-09 16:17:07 · answer #8 · answered by nat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one. I'd have to say both. She's still my wife and I have a duty to care for her. I would hope she would do the same.
2007-02-09 14:37:54 · answer #9 · answered by Eldude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i love my partner to bits and nothing would change if anything happened to one of us. I'll always be there for him and vice versa. if it appeared to be a duty then you never loved him/her in the first place.
2007-02-09 14:38:47 · answer #10 · answered by tinkypinkles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋