but my bodyclock is ticking,im 37.what age is it time to accept that i may never have babies,when do my chances of concieving stop.i dont even know if its medical thing if we do decide..but i know we just dont have intercourse end of story.
2007-02-08 23:11:12 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you want to have a child you either need to get lovemaking with your other half or move on to try and find someone else. If you are happy in the relationship you need to decide if you really want children or not... You could have a child on your own don't forget - lots of people are not in 'traditional' relationships and use sperm donors etc. If something works for you fine but if you want a child you obviously need to work on that part. I hope you find the solution that is right for you and makes you happy - good luck.
2007-02-08 23:13:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I advise you to act fast. I started having peri-menopausal symtoms at age 43. If you dont know what i mean by peri-menopause then look it up on the internet.
I would not put up with a sexless relationship but that is up to you.
I suggest you talk to him and tell him how you feel. It is up to YOU if you accept you won't have children or not. Plenty of women have children at your age and older. My mother had me at over 40.
Getting on 'ok' sounds rather boring to me but if you enjoy your comfortable lifestyle then think twice about having children anyway. Children are extremely demanding and you are probably set in your ways and a baby would be an immense shock!
Why dont you truly decide what YOU want. Then talk to him and see what he thinks. CAN he have sex? Do you fancy him? Do you want HIM to be the father....or a possible someone else?
There is an old saying - 'If you keep doing what you have always done, you will always get what you always got'. Therefore, get cracking and start living!
Faith
2007-02-09 08:19:08 · answer #2 · answered by Caroline 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll know your body is getting ready to call time when your periods get much shorter than they were and you start with the hot flushes etc. Talk to your gynae about this. As long as you're having regular periods you can get pregnant.
Of course if you really never have sex, you can't get pregnant with that partner. You need to talk to him about it. If he doesn't want a child, then you need to make a decision about whether it's worth it to keep on in the relationship. Think long and hard though before dumping this person you really get along with...you may not find someone new, or you may make a bad choice because you're desperate to concieve.
I've been married for 25 yrs and we just never had children. I see now that this is for the best, our lifestyle doesn't require validation via reproduction and I'm happy with him the way we are. Everyone's different; have a think about what you *really* want out of life and whether it's worth risking your relationship to reproduce.
2007-02-09 08:05:33 · answer #3 · answered by anna 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you have a sexless relationship then there is no way to have kids unless you get the parital insemination process involved. But, you are getting older. You need to decide if this is what you want and if the reasons why you are in a sexless relationship, is something that you can handle for the rest of your life-knowing you may never have kids if it didn't change.
You obviously have the feeling of wanting to have kids. I do not know if you are in a gay relationship or what the reasoning is, but you need to figure out what you want and stick with it!
2007-02-09 07:19:21 · answer #4 · answered by sweetybaby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you've fallen out of love. You may like each other and get on really well, in fact you may love each other like siblings. But you can't be blamed for not wanting to have sex with your 'sibling'.
If you want to keep the marriage, try some psychotherapy/sexual counselling. You will otherwise be driven mad by your desire for sex but inability to have sex together, and will only turn to other partners to satisfy your needs. How long til that happens? Months? A couple wasted years perhaps? And you're wanting to have a child in those circumstances??
If you don't want to keep the marriage and you realise there's no point in attempting to have yucky sex with someone you can't bear the thought of doing it with, then forget your lifestyle and move on to new partners.
Worry about your ticking clock in a few years' time.
2007-02-10 18:37:21 · answer #5 · answered by Summer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want children and don't plan on adopting, I suggest you fix ths "sexless" relationship thing you have going on. For the life of me I can't understand why anyone actually in love not being in a sexual relationship with the one they love unless it is medical in nature. If your biological clock is ticking you must be in your early 30's, you are awfully young to be in a sexless relationship. That usually comes after couples get much older and have been together for a long time. Most end up in separate bedrooms.
2007-02-09 07:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by sereta zandrae 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Red flag
My sister is in exactly the same situation and is your age. She is miserable.
Your ok - is telling me that you do not want to forsake the lifestyle.
I am not sure if he will talk about it or not but in my view there is an underlying problem here and first of all its his and then its yours if you accept this situation.
If he wont talk then i suggest you start seeing a qualified pysch as to stay a relationship whereby you are not satisfied means that you may have some self esteem issues.
2007-02-09 07:53:10 · answer #7 · answered by bumble bee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as far as babies, it isnt too late. i am 39 and pregnant with a child the docs said i would never have.
however, a sexless marriage is not a healthy marriage.
perhaps there are some medical reasons why he is unwilling or unable to perform? is he on medications that prohibit this? i would talk to him about it, and tell him your concerns about your "biological clock" and see what his thoughts are on it. maybe he is going through a hard time right now and just needs understanding, or maybe he has someone else he is giving it to. i know thats prolly not what you wanna hear, but you have to weight all possibilities in this hun.
talk to your lover, see where the root of theproblem is.
btw...women have babies way up in their forties now. so u have time. :)
2007-02-09 07:21:01 · answer #8 · answered by Truth Teller 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is okay good enough for you though? This is what you
want to ask yourself. You should talk to each other and
find out if your marriage is just in a rut. Find out if you
want to be parents. Weigh up the pros and cons of having
children. You have a few years yet - at the same time
you may have trouble conceiving.
You could go to Relate and see if you can get any advice
from them. It must be on your mind for you to come on here.
Good Luck.
2007-02-09 07:16:34 · answer #9 · answered by Minxy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't agree in a sexless relationship, something must be wrong in both of you. A child is the most precious gift a man or a woman can give to his partner, it's an expression of deepest love and long lasting commitment.
2007-02-09 07:37:15 · answer #10 · answered by gigi 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋