My fiancee is the sweetest man i have ever met and he loves me so much. He fixes my bath water, combs my hair, anything i need he gets it for me. We make passionate love together and get along very well. I mean he has things that annoy me but they do not out weight all the love he shows me. But when i see my self i wonder how can he love me. I dont feel that i am so pretty, i am a little overweight and my boobs are beyond huge. when i see us in a picture togehter i think how can he love me? he always tells me i am beautiful but i dont see it. He doesnt know how insecure i can be at times and when i am with him he makes me feel so special that i forget about the insecurity. But how do i get over it myself? And fully accept not jus his love but myself?
2007-02-08 22:30:24 · 11 answers · asked by exceptionallyexceptional 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You cannot let your insecurities get in the way of your relationship-if it is a constant battle with the way that you are feeling about yourself and constantly questioning how and why he loves you-then you can ruin the relationship.
We all have insecurities and in a way you sound like me. My husband loves me sooo much and would do anything for me, even though my body has changed and I hate many things about myself.
But, you have to remember if it was the other way around. If he felt the ways that you do, would you still love him the way that he is? Probably, right!
Remember that there is more to a marriage and a mature relationship leading into marriage. It is not just about looks-he obviously loves you for who you are and the way that your relationship is.
Be thankful that you have a good man in your life, and be thankful that you have substance (in the sense that you are real, and have a personality). I'd rather be smart and real and know that my heart is true and right and to be a good friend and have some problems with my appearance and feeling about myself. Than to be a complete air head and know nothing and not be independent but have the best body in the world!
You can always change your appearance, but who you are is unique and real. You are special and that is how he feels about you. Try to be thankful for the things that are good in your life.
And pray about it, it helps. Try to help yourself get to where you want to by physically-but remember that it is not the basis of your relationship-and that is a good thing!!
2007-02-08 23:28:03 · answer #1 · answered by sweetybaby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way the entertainment industry portrays to us what the "perfect" woman is, it is no wonder we all feel the way we do. There is a bit of insecurity in all of us although some seem to carry it to a further degree than others. It sounds as though you have found a great man...one that can love you for who you are as a whole package. You need to learn to accept this love on a personal level, which means learn to love yourself. It is not as easy as it sounds, but it CAN be done. Insecurity is a personal demon that usually ends up destroying relationships if carried out too far. So this is something you need to get a grip on soon.... Whether it be councelling or finding the strength within yourself to finally beat it.
2007-02-09 07:23:48 · answer #2 · answered by RetroChick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecurity is a personal demon, you have to get counceling, it is the best way to deal with it. I suffered for many years thinking I was not worthy and not good enough, after 13 years i finally got counceling and am free of that kind of thinking. I don't go around thinking I am hot stuff but I feel pretty good about myself now.
2007-02-09 06:43:24 · answer #3 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A fiancee is someone who is not yet married ie still single. Means that IF he werent into you he would have left. So think of this from now on! He is with you cos he wants to be - cos he loves you - cos he cares for you - you are special to him. So thank your stars that you were lucky enough to find your true love:)
2007-02-09 08:25:32 · answer #4 · answered by chasey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consider your feelings for him. Are they based on the superficial details of his appearance? Can you accept that his adoration of you is also deeper than your looks? Continue to accept his love and I don't believe that therapy is an answer to everything. Living is the answer, and telling yourself every chance you get that each of us is worthy of love and acceptance, no matter the size of our parts or even our disposition. We are worthy simply because we exist. We need do nothing but BE. So, love him, be loved. Do it over and over. Be open and let yourself change.
2007-02-09 06:52:56 · answer #5 · answered by Ande 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r beautiful.face it.maybe u have set higher standards.but wise men look beyond physical beauty.u r very lucky.enjoy every moment of ur togetherness.surely u have many other qualities he loves.but bit doesnt mean u should neglect ur appearance.be well groomed all the time and shower him with all the love u can.most important if u think u r beautiful u look beautiful.
2007-02-09 06:47:18 · answer #6 · answered by natasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being beautiful is so much more than being physically attractive.
You have a man who loves YOU. That doesn't mean let your body go to total hell, but he is more interested in the person inside.
Just accept it. It's great. Be happy.
2007-02-09 06:41:52 · answer #7 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He loves you for you and it goes way beyond just looks. You need counseling and help to get past your insecuritys about yourself. you need to get better and stop questioning his love for you or you may end up losing him because of it.
2007-02-09 06:43:15 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
may be he is just doing a commitment
but i feel that he really does loves you seeing in detail
as love is a feeling for feeling and not just a physical satisfaction
2007-02-09 06:43:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very lucky. Stop being insecure and think that if he doesn't love you he would not be with you now.
2007-02-09 07:04:59 · answer #10 · answered by gigi 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋