I am 36 weeks pregnant with my fourth child. With the delivery of my other children I felt overwhelmed by "company". I was talking to my husband about it and would like for this to be a somewhat private moment between us but don't know how to tell my mother. She was present at 2 out of 3 of my other deliveries.
2007-02-08 17:07:10 · 19 answers · asked by allgirlz1stboy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I am sure you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings so why not just not tell them. When you go into labor have your husband take you to the hospital and wait until after you have delivered the baby to actually phone your family to tell them about the joyous event.
2007-02-08 17:22:27 · answer #1 · answered by Elizabeth 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My mom doesnt think that the delivery room is her place to be. She feels that she wasnt there when we made the baby, why should she be there when we have the baby. I am not decided about what I want, and I know that she would be there if I wanted her to be, but at the same time I want just my husband there. I am bringing my mom with us to our u/s next month. My mom never got to have them with me and my sister, so I figured it would be neat for her to see her grandbaby this early. If this is going to be your last baby, you could let her know nicely that because this is your last chance to have that moment with your hubby you would like her to help out with the other children, maybe she can keep them for you for the day/ night or at the hospital.Im sure it would be very hard to change the delivery "routine" now, but best of luck.
2007-02-09 01:20:58 · answer #2 · answered by krickee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I felt exactly the same way and let me tell you it was not easy (especially because it was my first pregnancy and I am the youngest daughter in the family). Everyone, including my mother, just assumed I would want her there. I did not! I had to just come out and say, "I only want my husband in the room."
The really tough thing was that my mom showed up anyway!! She and my dad were supposed to go to our home and wait with my husband's parents, but they came to the hospital! I was still in the early stages of labor so I let them stay a little while and when my mom tried to stay when my dad was leaving I had to tell her to go, saying I wanted to be alone.
You have the perfect explanation though...tell your mother the truth, that you felt overwhelmed and really tired out. Then tell her you really NEED her to be with your other kids and take care or help take care of them until the baby is born and they can come visit. Good luck!
2007-02-09 01:35:02 · answer #3 · answered by C.D.N. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand the touchy situation...however, if you are set on not having anyone in the delivery room with you, just say so. If it is that important to you, you will be able to say it.
I do not want my mother-in-law to be in the delivery room, but it's not so important to me that I want to risk damaging her relationship with me or her son...so if she can find her way to the hospital and make it there in time, she can be in the room.
Maybe that would be an "easy" way out for you. Just don't call until after you've had the baby. Then there isn't any discussion about it. It really is your decision anyway. Good luck to you!
2007-02-09 01:14:24 · answer #4 · answered by Amber R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you already know about childbirth and how very special those first few hours are I would just come straight out and say it, if they are a supportive loving family they should understand. It is a beautiful time that you and him should be able to share on your own. Anyway they should be there for your other children maybe tell them if they do want to participate or help that's the best thing they could do for you.
2007-02-09 01:16:51 · answer #5 · answered by mel_leno 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is how "I would not like anyone but my husband to attend the delivery." Then when you are admitted you tell them at the desk that you don't want anyone else in there during the delivery and they will keep everyone out.
2007-02-09 01:11:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell everyone you only want your husband there. If anyone questions that, tell them you would like for this to be a somewhat private moment between you and your husband. If they try to argue tell them it's not up for discussion. Simple as that. Your mother doesn't have to like it, but you do need to stand up for yourself. What's the worst she's going to do? Not visit?
2007-02-09 01:19:35 · answer #7 · answered by Thegustaffa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either tell them you want this delievery to be just you and your husband or you could tell them the doctor would prefer only one person attend the birth and that be your husband. I was the same way I didn't want a party sized group in the room while I was laboring and giving birth. Good luck on the new baby.
2007-02-09 01:12:09 · answer #8 · answered by jewell2578 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can tell you how my daughter and her husband did it and it was very effective. She told me and I wouldn’t let anyone in I told everyone that they wanted it to be a special moment between the three of them and no one else was to go in and if anyone tried to go in I was going to tackle them, and you know what not one person even tried to go in, everyone in the family totally respected there wishes just like I am sure your two families will do the same. Just tell her you want this to be a special moment for you and your husband I am sure she will understand.
It really is a moment for you and your husband and no one else.
2007-02-09 02:50:47 · answer #9 · answered by Male_42_us 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would she even pressume to be there?????
i think thats appaling.
i always thought i would want a frind to attend along with my husband......for extra support etc. but the closer i get to delivery, the more i feel that its probbley a very intiment moment for the two of us.
if i still deciide to have my frined there.........she can stay for the labour but actual delivery i would rather her not be there.
2007-02-09 06:23:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋