I have 2 kids but you cant even tell, my Fiance is 42 and lately he has acted like he dont want to have sex with me.. his excuse everytime is that he is tired.
However when I pretend that I am asleep he silently lays there and masterbates, if I pretend to start waking up he stops pulls the covers over himself and pretends that he is asleep. when I roll back over, he quickly finishes up. I never bothered saying anything to him about it at first then I brought it up to his attention and he always keeps the same story "he claims he trys to wake me up" I know he dont cause I am not asleep!! I finally got a job working 1st shift, he will not get up with me to say goodbye, but I check the computer history and he gets on and surfs police stuff (hes a cop) right after I leave. Today I came home and checked the history and he had several porn sites he visited including adult friend finder.. what is going on? PLEASE some body help me..what can I do? what am I doing wrong? is he cheating on me?
2007-02-08 13:24:53 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sorry honey...your guy has very deep seated problems. This isn't an issue about you. Don't get hung up on thinking bad things about yourself.
He is being dishonest. Do you want that in a husband/mate? He can't even tell you the truth and is playing games with you. He is betraying you every day by lying to you about his needs, what he is doing and his lack of desire for you.
There is such a thing as an addiction to porn. So much so that they are unable to perform sexually with a real live person. You can't help him on that one sweetie. He most likely will not get help for it at this stage.
He is not showing he loves you. He is rejecting you every day. Are you happy? Is this what you really want your life to be like at your beautifully young age? Honey...he really IS too old for you. Even if you love him...21 and 42 is way, way too old. Don't you want to feel adored? To have fabulous sex with someone who is so into you all the time? To know you can trust him completely and build a life together?
He has not shown any desire to change...and he is a liar. Period.
Make choices that while temporarily might hurt...but in the long run bring you deeper joy and contentment.
Far too many people screw up their lives because 'they love him/her'. Please do not make the huge, huge, huge mistake of hoping it will change if you marry him!
Sometimes you have to love someone enough to let them go.
Take good care of YOU.
2007-02-16 07:08:26 · answer #1 · answered by kallie m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am soo sorry but these kind of questions tend to tick me off a bit. I realise that skinny girls tend to think they are overweight sometimes and it grosses me out I have a friend who is an inch taller and the same weight and she looks sick so based on that and based on your BMI you are underweight and you should be gaining if anything. I am 4'9 (and three quarters.. lol) and I weigh 120. I look healthy but its because I hold in in the right spots and I have started working out so some is gaining into muscle, but according to my BMI I am actually 20 pounds overweight. For my height and my age I should be between 100 to 115 tops. I have been 100 pounds before and about 10 yrs ago I lost 50 pound and went to 95(withen a three month period)... even at 105 I looked sick my hips in the back stuck out and the front you could count my ribs.. I went from a c cup to an a cup from size 9 pants to 0 it was DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!! not to mention the fact my face sagged worse then an 80 yr old man. DO NOT LOOSE WEIGHT!!. Besides, god forbid, what happens if you get seriously sick you have no weight to afford to loose as it is. that's what happen to me so imagine where I would have been if I had have already been at my healthy weight. I would have been a 50 pound 15 year old girl and probably not around to write this to you.
2016-05-23 23:24:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well thats not right. Next time just ask him flat out if hes masturbating and why? I think porn sites are very addicting and have broken up more than one family. That needs to stop, you could put a block on the porn sites that hes going too.
2007-02-15 13:56:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's the 1 w/the problem.Not u.Try 2 talk 2 him.Tell him 2 b up front w/u.Hell 2 can play that game.The last thing u want 2 do is sit at home doing w/out.Or,waiting on him.If he's not going 2 do the same.Good luck girl.
2007-02-16 11:13:30 · answer #4 · answered by Joyful 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think your best option is to talk to him about your problems, when u check the porn sites are they fetish sites or are they normal sites. DO NOT think that it is you. ITS NOT. the problem is probably lack of communication and him not wanting to hurt you, but at the same time he doesn't know that he is hurting you. maybe try this. as you two are laying there and he is doing "it" just lay there as you are sleep and ask : Why are you doing this? just a suggestion. i kind of went through the same thing because i am pregnant
2007-02-13 17:46:21 · answer #5 · answered by jai1603 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any man who lays there and masturbates next to a young and attractive woman who would bang his brains out, waits till she leaves, and goes to computer porn has serious issues.
I doubt confronting him and demanding he get treatment would be successful. His problem is too deep seated. Get yourself out of this unhealthy situation.
2007-02-15 08:27:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TRY TALKING TO HIM ABOUT IT AGAIN AND WHEN YOU CATCH HIM IN A LIE CALL HIM ON IT. YOU MAY WANT TO ASK HIM WHAT YOU COULD DO TO IMPROVE YOUR SEX LIFE.I WOULDN'T SAY HE IS PHYSICALLY CHEATING BUT MAYBE MENTALLY CHEATING, IF HE HAS AN ADDICTION TO PORN. I DO NOT KNOW YOUR HISTORY TOGETHER, SO IT IS REALLY HARD TO GIVE CLEAR ADVICE ON THE SUBJECT.
2007-02-12 14:02:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure it's not you. You should go to a toy shop and get some things out of the ordinary. Try like whips, chains, hand cuffs, etc...
get out of your element, cause it sounds like he's just bored. We all get bored of things at times. You just need to spruce it up!!!!!!!
2007-02-16 03:26:14 · answer #8 · answered by Shay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is addicted to porn...I have read that when this happens you dont need contact with a "real" human...If you want to work it out, he needs rehab.....
2007-02-16 01:04:58 · answer #9 · answered by xchefsjl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say hes jerkin off next to you in bed,man that is f--ked up,get rid of this creepo.
2007-02-15 23:02:31 · answer #10 · answered by dcam47 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋