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sue does not have any children of her own and wants to play a active part in my childs life(attend teacher conferences,volunteer at joey's sports events ect).the problem is my exwife,shes very jealous of sue and wants her to have very little to do with joey(casual freinds at best).i have joint custody so i have as much say as my ex but she has been known to put up a stink and i'm afraid joey will be the one to suffer to see his parents go at it.joey in 8yrs and i have been divorced for 5yrs.stepmoms/divorced dads how would u handle this?should i tell my wife to back off for now on the mother thing? or should i tell my ex to back off and just hope it will not cause ant problems for my son.

2007-02-08 13:02:34 · 5 answers · asked by lorianneperry12 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

5 answers

WHY WOULD YOU TELL YOUR WIFE TO BACK OFF. HER INTENSTIONS ARE HONEST. SHE LOVES YOU AND SHE WANTS TO KNOW YOUR CHILD.

YOUR EX SHOULD BACK OFF A BIT. IS GREAT TO HAVE A WIFE THAT IS VERY INTERESTING IN BEING IN THE LIFE OF YOUR CHILD. YOUR EX, SHOULD FEEL NO FEAR FOR HAVING AN EXTRA PERSON INVOLVE IN THE LIFE OF YOUR SON.

YOU SEE, MY PARENTS GOT DIVORCE WHEN I WAS 12, SO MY PARENTS HAD JOINT CUSTODY OF ALL 5 OF US, LATER 3 OUT OF THE 5 KIDS WENT TO LIVE WITH OUR FATHER. MY FATHER HAD MARRIED AGAIN AND SHE WAS VERY COOL PERSON. MY MOTHER WAS VERY JELOUS OF HER AND SHE DIDNT WANTED HER TO BE PART OF OUR GROWING UP. I MYSELF GOT REALLY CLOSE TO HER. AND LEARN A LOT FROM HER WHILE I WAS LIVING WITH DAD.

SOME TIMES IS HARD TO SEE OUR CHILDREN BE INVOLVE WITH ANOTHER WOMAN, WHAT WE CAN HOPE IS FOR THE BEST.

2007-02-08 13:31:06 · answer #1 · answered by ♥*~ღ~NYSunrise~ღ~*♥ 4 · 1 1

You need to sit down--you, your ex, and your current. This should not be what adults want, this should not be about what mom or dad want. This should be absolutely and only about what is best for your child. In addition, depending on the child's age, would I also involve the child. Children know a lot better what's what than we sometimes think. The three of you need to find a workable solution where each has a certain amount of responsibility. The child is entitled to love each and every one of you, regardless of how you get along with each other. Maybe if you can talk to your ex in a calm manner, pointing out to her that there was no way that you were trying to replace her as a mother, but that you would like to be able to provide the best environment for your child, meaning that the 3 of you work together, maybe your ex will calm down and agree to a workable solution.

2007-02-08 13:12:18 · answer #2 · answered by rvrmldnd 2 · 1 1

Your child has a mother and 'parent - teacher conferences' are for parents and your new wife is not one of them. A child needs one mother and one father, the remaining adults can be a friend to the child and good role models. Respect your ex-wife by making certain that your new wife does not try to take any of her roles. Your son needs to have respect for his step-mother, but she is not his mother, she needs to back off and you need to be the one to let her know. How would you feel if the situation was turned around? Imagine you were single and your ex-wife remarried and her new husband wanted to be your son's brand new dad! Hurts eh?

2007-02-08 13:17:10 · answer #3 · answered by Littlesby 3 · 1 1

ok how much involvement would you like her to have? The three of you need to sit down, talk. Your wife has every right to be involved with your son. Joint custody. If your ex has a problem with it, thats her problem. I vote for the wife... let her be as involved as she wants to be.

2007-02-08 13:11:19 · answer #4 · answered by zsaffireblue2003 4 · 1 1

the more love...the merrier! how could your ex disagree?

2007-02-08 13:16:50 · answer #5 · answered by dali333 7 · 0 1

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