Nancy Pelosi. How would you finish this joke about her?

Question

Nancy Pelosi, Al Gore and a talking duck walk into a bar......take it from there and give me the best you have from both the left and the right. C'mon you know you want to!!

Answer 1

A drunk in the corner yells ""hey,look! A duck with two a$$holes!"

Answer 2

Nancy Pepsi, Al Gore and a talking duck walk into a bar and order drinks

Nancy order a Pepsi

Al Gore order an environmental friendly drink

The duck couldn't pronounce his drink " I would like a Dee, doo, daam thee ada...(?) " : smirk on face

Who is the duck? Bush!!!

Answer 3

The Duck says: "Well I can see why you two were so delighted about this new Bar! I can see my Pastor Haggard likes the place too! Excuse me while I refrain from buying anybody any drinks or picking up any dropped change! And yes to everyone, I am happily and "Legally" "Married"!-And no, I would not like to "Dance"!"

Answer 4

The duck says - I'm George Bush, howdy!
Nancy and Al say - You're a duck.
the duck says - I'm the Decider.
Nancy and Al say - You're still a duck.
the duck says - Just try and stop me.
Nancy and Al say - Better duck, duck.

Later that evening Nancy and Al say - Yum, that sure was a good duck.

Answer 5

And the Talking Duck walks out with all the votes.

Answer 6

"...and the duck's name is Dubya, the Republic Party Texican rodeo clown who farts and chases after the odor as he wobbles on one foot because the other foot is in his mouth! Al Gore turns to Nancy Pelosi and says, "Nancy, you like dumb animals, you better warn him that Veep Cheney has a shotgun and he's somewhere around here..." Dubya the dumb duck orders a drink and says, "Lookee here, yuh put that thar drink on muh bill!" The bartender asks, "Why, because you're a duck...?" and Dubya says, "No, I'm a BUSH..." and the bartender says, "You're a duck!" and Dubya says, "I'm a BUSH!" and this goes on and on... Finally, Nancy turns to the bartender and says, "Oh for crissakes, leave him alone... if he says he's a BUSH, let it go... let him be the 'Decider'... that poor dumb birdbrain duck! Haven't you any compasson for the mentally disfunctional?"

The dumb duck says, "I have two a@sholes!" and both Nancy and Al turn him upside down and spread his feathers apart and notice only one pair of lips blowing kisses at them..." They turn him loose and again the Dubya says, "I have two a@sholes!" and sure enough, through the bar's swinging doors enter Veep Cheney and Rumsfeld, both of them smiling! Nancy and Al look at one another and both say, "Yep, there are his two a$sholes!" Al turns to Nancy and says, "Oh, boy, poor duck... Cheney's got a shotgun! Let's say a prayer for Dubya, that poor dumb duck!"

Answer 7

and the Duck says, "Hey, what about Jim from the Midwest? Is he coming?"
And Pelosi says, "Naw, I wouldn't lend him my plane. Offical business only, you know."
And Al says, "Did you know I invented Jim from the Midwest and he is the prime cause of global warming?"
And the Duck says, "Jeez what a couple of whackos. I'm outta here."


(And shotgun, even though I am a Democrat through and through, that was pretty damn funny!)

Answer 8

hey bgood, you stole mine. Anyway...

Pelosi says 'Hey I wanna go to Mickey D's. Wait, no Wendys, wait no. Oh the President hates Mickey D's? Yeah Donalds it is.

I know it's lame, but it's true, too.

Answer 9

They ask for a beer, but the bartenders tell them the Bush daughters just left and had drank them all. Giggity, giggity....

Answer 10

And the talking duck says "George W Bush is a gigantic douche".

So the entire bar roared with laughter and approval and spent the rest of the evening buying drinks for all three of them.

The End