Is it possible to be in a successful multiple person marriage?

Question

If you all love each other equally what is to keep a multiple person marriage from working?

Answer 1

Only if your Mormon and not many of them practice polygamy anymore. One is bound to get jealous of the other or feel left out. Don't marry just live together as long as possible.

Answer 2

I can list a whole bunch of reasons why I cheated on my partner, but none of them are good enough excuses to cover up the disgusting act of infidelity. When my boyfriend and I first started dating, I was a drunk and a drug addict. I was often taking cocaine and ecstasy/mushrooms whenever I could, which was fairly often. Being a young and alright-looking girl, I got hit on during these parties. One thing lead to another and I was sleeping with other men even though I had a boyfriend working across the country. You see, he used to work at an oil company in British Columbia (Canada) which caused him to leave every two weeks for two weeks. My boyfriend knows the truth of my cheating experiences now. After we quit drinking six to seven months ago (completely sober except for an occasional joint here and there) none of that stuff happened anymore. Before we quit I had an epiphany, prayed to a god that I do not believe in, and smartened up. No longer would I live the way I had been living. I thank my boyfriend everyday (whether I speak it out loud or think it to myself) for changing me. The man saved my goddamn life. Without his forgiveness and patience, I could be selling my body for the next high. Anyway, that story is for another time. The point is, I cheated because I was young and reckless. I cheated because I was intoxicated and not in the right state of mind. Most of all, I cheated because I did not care about him. I could not have cared for him even if I wanted to, because I did not care for MYSELF. Such is the story of any addict. All of that is over now. I am proud to say that I am one of those rare people you find that can change. They say "once a cheater, always a cheater" but that is not the case for me. I suppose I was never a "cheater". I would never have called myself that, even if others labelled me as so. Yes, I have cheated, but it was never who I was inside. It was the drugs and everything else that made me the sick person I once was.

Answer 3

It is "possible" but there are a lot of odds against it succeeding.

First of all, it's hard enough for two people to find each other who are emotionally mature enough to go the long run.

Couples need a sufficient amount of common interests, mutual respect, compromise, and forgiveness.

When you start adding one or two more people to that equation, the risks increase exponentially.

What are the odds that 3 or 4 people can ALL have the qualities I outlined above? Pretty darned slim.

Then, of course, there are feelings of jealousy and things like performance anxiety.

I know more than a little bit about polyamory, so take my advice for what it's worth.

And good luck to you.

Answer 4

Things that will keep it from working:

1. One person will end up growing up and come to find that she/he is not happy and wants a spouse to himself/herself.

2. Jelousy.

3. Lack of privacy when trying to romance one person.

4. What are you going to tell your children, if any?

5. Illegal in many states (if it's in the US)

6. Anger that will lead up to possible homicide or lovers quarrel.

Answer 5

usually the law is whats keeping multiple spouse from occuring. Of course in some forth world countries you can try it and maybe even like it but at what sacrifice to the way you are accustomed to living?

Answer 6

You have to ask yourself this... In entering such a relationship are you doing what is best for the other people or just yourself?

is everybody happier because of the 3rd person... or is there somebody who wishes the 3rd wasn't in the relationship...

If all 3 want the 3rd and would be less happy if the 3rd person wasn't there then I say go for it...

if not... then somebody is being selfish...

Answer 7

I would imagine Jealousy would be the number one thing that would keep a polygamist marriage from working..I don't know any polygamists so I can't really say..I have always found the idea intriguing tho...

Answer 8

Jealousy is the main problem. I am in a pologamous marriage and that is the only problem. I love my husband and I love my co wife, but I feel I always need to compete with her.

I made a Yahoo group on this subject if you want to join. http://www.groups.yahoo.com/group/muslim_polygamy

Answer 9

The other two people.

Answer 10

Your question is very interesting but is open for myriad interpretations, some of which I am sure you are not looking for. Please be more specific and I'd be glad to give you my opinion on the matter.