Why are a lot of nice people lonely and unpopular, and a lot of mean, rude people are well liked?

Question

I mean this kind of behavior makes absolutely no sense what so ever. You would think that people who are nice are more likely to have a lot of friends and be popular but the majority of the times that does not seem to be the case. If you think back to high school, who were the popular kids the mean, rude ones. And it still continues on in college, the workforce and places like the entertainment industry. I mean why.

Answer 1

many time these people are really not genuinely liked they are feared.

Answer 2

I don't believe people who behave selfishly, entitled, and rude are well liked at all. I think nice people fear mean people and are too "nice" to do anything about it. Nice people don't rock the boat; they maintain the status quo because it is their job to get along with others. Furthermore, concerning "popularity," what do you think makes rude, entitled people so popular? Getting away with it for starters. However, in time, behavior like this is intolerable. It gets old fast. Most popular mean people will alienate others, who tire of the behavior and move on to more functional people who can actually fulfill their side of a friendship. The larger the social circle, the longer it will take for the mean popular person to burn his/her bridges, but eventually word will get around and Mr or Miss Popular will be known and Mr or Miss spoiled brat.

Nothing lasts forever. Remove the audience and the actors will leave.

Concerning the first part of your question on nice people who are "lonely" and "unpopular", I find it interesting how the labels you use to describe nice people are so negative. While it may seem that being nice is negative, changing your perspective could help you feel better. While it is true that we all crave and love intense, blood curdling experiences, the truth is such experiences are short lived. It's like running really fast during a marathon. For how long can you keep that up and still finish the race? At mile 10 your body could start to tire quickly and you may not make it to the 26th mile. The same is true about life. The daily grind of routine and hard work, both on the job and with friends, will keep you functional and stable for a long time.

Answer 3

From my observations it's because nice people care about other people's feelings - when they make comments they don't want to hurt others. They are sincere in their statements and their affections. The rude people want a laugh at anyone's expense and they usually get it. It goes on through life. But if you're only looking at quantity you'll be disappointed, the rude and mean people tend to have a lot more friends, and people around them. But they also go through people a lot quicker. A nice person isn't necessarily lonely but they might not have as many friends. Look at the calibre of their friends though, they'll have friends since kindergarten - they care about people and they stick with them. It's a personality issue. And sometimes people who act out aren't mean, they're insecure. It's not popularity, it's having someone you can trust.

Answer 4

Wow, funny you should ask, I was actually wondering the same thing this morning. I started to ask it on here but I didn't.

Take me for example, I work my a55 off 10 hours every day at my regular job, then I go home clean, cook, do laundry, etc. Then I have several more hours of volunteer labor for my boyfriend's business - book keeping, invoicing, etc. That keeps me busy until midnight or so. I have 2 teenage daughters to tak ecare of. Several nights a week I also volunteer some of my time helping with sports, booster programs, and other school things. I am as nice and kind to everyone as I can possibly be. I go WAYYYY out of my way to help EVERYONE I CAN!

Do you think I get any thanks or recognition for it? Hell no. No one appreciates me or the things I do for them. I am not a popular person either. Maybe I need to stop all the nice things I do?

Answer 5

Because the world is not perfect. I think you've been pushed around by mean people, and the experience has clouded your perspective. The reality is a little less sinister. If you smile at the world, the world smiles back at you. If you expect others to be mean, they'll rise to your expectations and be mean. Think of the people who have been nice to you. Were they suffering from their own loneliness? Or were they generally happy? Usually, happiness is a requirement for friendliness. As for the mean people, they are usually trying to cover up their own personal suffering. Don't pay too much attention to popularity. It's an empty bag.

Answer 6

I think that is related to human nature. People is evil and like evil people. If you are a nice guy, most people will not like you. On the other hand, rude and mean people are heroes for the majority of human race.

Answer 7

A lot of nice people are too busy being nice people to be concerned about superficial things like popularity.

Answer 8

Women do not find nice men attractive. They find men who are successful with confidence and power attractive. They find the alpha male attractive. They find the guy that is going to stand up to the world if he were to have her baby and support her and her baby. Being nice doesn't accomplish this. Doing everything someone asks of you doesn't get it done either. There is all kinds of testing that goes on when two people interact.

Answer 9

i do no longer think people who behave selfishly, entitled, and impolite are properly enjoyed in any respect. i think of extraordinary human beings worry advise human beings and are too "extraordinary" to do something approximately it. extraordinary human beings do no longer rock the boat; they save the status quo because of the fact it rather is their interest to get alongside with others. apart from, on the subject of "attractiveness," what do you think of makes impolite, entitled human beings so familiar? Getting away with it for starters. although, in time, habit like it rather is insupportable. It gets previous quickly. maximum familiar advise human beings will alienate others, who tire of the habit and flow directly to extra clever people who can surely fulfill their area of a friendship. the better the social circle, the longer it is going to take for the advise familiar individual to burn his/her bridges, yet finally be conscious gets around and Mr or omit familiar would be familiar and Mr or omit spoiled brat. no longer something lasts continuously. get rid of the objective audience and the actors will leave. relating to the 1st area of your question on extraordinary people who're "lonely" and "unpopular", i discover it interesting how the labels you employ to describe extraordinary persons are so detrimental. whilst it could seem that being extraordinary is detrimental, changing your attitude could want that can assist you you experience extra effective. whilst it rather is authentic that all of us crave and love extreme, blood curdling stories, in reality such stories are short lived. that is like working rather quickly for the time of a marathon. for a fashion long are you able to hold that up and nevertheless end the race? At mile 10 your physique could desire to start to tire rapidly and you won't make it to the twenty 6th mile. the comparable is authentic approximately life. The every day grind of recurring and not worry-free artwork, the two on the interest and with friends, will save you clever and robust for a protracted time.

Answer 10

because life is backwards at times,the nice ones are not liked cause they don;t have the 100.00dollers for a pair of jeans..if people could except what people were from the heart 'not the pocket book.but for thousands of yrs it;s the people with money that get everything but us poor folks don;t get anything cause we don;t have millions to buy it or have it made,,LOL

Answer 11

Cause nice girls/guys finish last!!
Don't know why but it seems the nastier and uncaring a person is towards another feelings the more they are adored..Backward **** Society!!!