Need opinions!!!?

Question

I have a 19 year ols son from aprevious marriage and my husband has sort of kicked him out of the house. It was inadvertantly, but the fact remains that my son is gone. He has a full-time job so he isn't lazy in that respect but he kind of got a smart *** attitude and refused to clean his room. I asked him in the past to pay a little for rent, utilities and food but he hasn't. My husband put a truck and insurance in his name so my son would have a way to go and when he left my husband took the truck. My son was making the payments on that and paid the difference on the insurance every month. Am I wrong for thinking that my husband was wrong? And does it make any difference that my husband gave his son a truck when he was 15 and didn't make him pay a dime? Also, my son has put a significant amount of money into the truck so should my husband pay for the upgrades such as tires? Down payment? My son's February payment since he paid for February and doesn't have the truck?

Thanks to those of you so far but please someone answer the last few questions too. I really need help with this one.

Answer 1

I wish I could tell this to everyone in this situation. NEVER let any man come between you and your child. Your child will always be teh most important person. I don't care if you have been with your husband for 20 years or 20 days, you should not allow him to run your son away.

Answer 2

Since your husband beef is with your son have him transfer the title to your name (sell you the truck for a simbolic amount $) and then you decide what to do with it.

Sugestion: Have your son provide with proof of insurance before you give him the truck.

Your husband shouldn't pay your son for upgrades because he was using the truck.
He should not have kicked your son out without talking to you first. He could have at least gave him a written notice and you should have cleaned his room if you didn't want this to happpen, obviously it was bothering your husband enough to kick him out.
Your son is 19 he will find someone get married etc. Also tell your son that his attittude is putting a strain in your marriage and he needs to respect your home and your husband.

Answer 3

Sounds like some impartiality going on here. Or perhaps a personality conflict. At any rate, you need to stand up for whatever you believe to be right.......on both sides, your husband
.....AND your son. He's 19, and if he's not a full time student, living at home, he needs to contribute to the household in the form of rent. And the truck should be HIS and HIS responsibility.

Answer 4

Unless you want a divorce you'll keep your nose out of the situation. I know that you being the mother have a hand in whats happening, but, it seems your sons smart mouth got him in big trouble. That's the lesson he needs to learn here! Not that Mommy will divorce this dude cause I have a problem with him, and feel he's not treating me fairly. Tell your son what goes around comes around. He didn't treat his step father fair even though this guy seems to have bent over backwards for a son that biologically wasn't his. Tell him to join the armed forces! He needs to grow up!

Answer 5

The truck should be your sons and your son should pay for the insurance. Your husband needs to think of you and what all this does to you. Tell him...

Answer 6

your husband was wrong to take the truck back because it has always been your son's responsibility. now, as far as kicking your son out, maybe it was necessary because he was not really helping around. if he works, either he gets his own place or stays with you while making a financial contribution. but definitely, the truck must be returned to him.

Answer 7

The sooner you treat your son as a man, the sooner he will be one.
Amazing how some parents obey their children well.
Where parents do too much for their children, the children will not do much for themselves.

Your son is a man. You don't need to get involved on that one. He needs to know that his actions will cause a reaction and take responsibility for being messy, Have him pay $ 50 to a maid and have her come twice a month to do the hard cleaning, if he's not willing to do it himself.

Answer 8

You should tell your husband how you feel (if you haven't already) and you are absolutely correct to feel your son was slighted in this situation. Your husband is being disrespectful to you and your son. Good luck

Answer 9

Your son should have had more respect for your husband. Tell your son that you love him but his attitude is costly. Your husband may not be merciful but you must stand by him in his decision.