Not receiving love as a child, from family.....?

Question

not really having any friends,,Do you think that it effects the way you can/can't love people/family in your adult life?

Answer 1

Yes it can but you can get past it. You probably got issues from it but if you work on those problems, then you don't have to fall victim to it period.

I have a friend who does not have any friends or a lover because this person sees theirself a certain way and does not want to move past it. This person would rather fantasize about being with people than actually finding someone and living life because they have allowed themselves to be a victim.

Instead of going around and seeing yourself as hopeless cause because your family didn't care and you have no friends, you have to learn that not all people are that way and that your parents were probably just self centred.

It can cause depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder,
delinquency and later adult criminal behavior, drug and alcohol abuse, and a greater likelihood of growing up to repeat the cycle of negative behaviors as a parent). interfere with normal social, cognitive, and affective development, including the development of language, social relationships, and academic skills. This is what it can cause to happen, it does not neccesarilty mean it will.

Counseling can help or finding an understanding friend to talk to.

Answer 2

I grew up in a family of three girls, being the middle. My mom hated me, hated the way I laughed etc... She said I had cholic and cried when she sang to me. So she never bonded with me. My grandmother recently told me my mom used to leave me in the back of the house all day long cause she couldnt deal with me. My mom pretty much raised us alone because dad worked all of the time. And she developed alcoholism as we grew up. When I was 12 she sent me to a Baptist boarding school for rebellious children. She said I had to go or she would divorce my dad. So i went so the family didnt have to be torn apart. I got to come home when I was 17 but then got pregnant by the neighbor boy and was in an abusive relationship with him for 17 years. I finally got away from him and started seeing a counselor. she really helped me alot and showed me that I can never make my mother happy. I havent talked to her in 4 years and I have to say, I am so relieved that I dont have to try to make her love me anymore. Onus on her, she is the one missing out.
But am I f*cked up? Can i have a decent relationship? I dont really know. And I am 38...

PS. Dr Laura isn't even human. Listen to your heart before you listen that bag.

Answer 3

HELL YES, you grow up trying to Find that Special someone and All you want out of them is a Mother you never had, Believe me, I've been in that situation with this Crazy *** guy that was Adopted and Let's just say that One didn't end Pretty....Im still in Theraphy from the Number he Did on me PLUS I have Trust issues cause I Now think all Guys are that way!

Answer 4

As a child my dad never really did anything with me or my sister. He'd talk about us, call us names (from ugly, to stupid and on), complain about the way we'd dress, (my sister dressed to sleezy, I dressed to much like a boy) and then he divorced my mom after she'd started his business for him. He basically told us he didn't need us anymore. Because of that I always had a hard time with relationships. I never wanted them to get to serious and then I could never completely trust the boy, because I felt he was going to leave me. My sister refused to get serious with biys so she only dated them for about 2 weeks before breaking up with them. Now I'm in my 1st serious relationship. We've been together for 2 1/2 years, and we're having a child. I deal with self reassurance everyday for things that happened over 10 years ago.

Answer 5

No, when you become an adult you can choose to be whatever you wish. You can decide to nurture loving, close relationships, you can choose to pursue friendships, you can choose to behave in a loving way. Blaming your childhood is an excuse.

"Too much time is dedicated to repeating the ugly dynamics of childhood in a vain attempt to repair or cope with deep hurt and longings. Too often they use their emotional pain to control others or excuse their own inappropriate and destructive behaviors. Some turn to therapy, only to find themselves trapped in their self-pitying victim mode, robbed of optimism, confidence, and growth."-- Bad Childhood, Good Life
http://www.drlaurashop.com/product.php?id=104&PHPSESSID=e0d49c953427dd3deb543f1f53f378d7

Answer 6

I believe that anyone can overcome most anything if they try. It can have some affect on you, but you can learn as you grow up.

Answer 7

it may be one of the reasons. most people overcome it when there grown and on there own. i belive it can change and you do have feeling to love when your older......