I have a problem getting to know people. I am in my final year of university and I still don't know anyone from my course.
I had a job but i was fired because I didn't speak to anyone.
I normally have nothing to say in a to people in a social situation.
How do I make friends, meet women etc...?
2007-02-08
03:26:09
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20 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Social Science
➔ Psychology
The job I had was in telesales.
2007-02-08
03:53:53 ·
update #1
I got it to try and improve my social skills but it didn't help.
2007-02-08
03:54:24 ·
update #2
join groups that interest you to meet like minded people then you have a starting point in common
2007-02-08 03:28:52
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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It sounds as though you feel a bit awkward in social situations. Perhaps the best thing that you can do is to find something that you can talk about that is of interest to you and the other people. Try finding another job, or looking to volunteer for some charity work. Or if that is too big a step, try talking to one of the people on your course, you have things in common with them, after all. If you are still struggling, and its because you get nervous, try getting a job in telesales. They are always looking for people, and you are on the phone so the other person will not be able to see you. Some of the people you talk to will be really rude or put down the phone, but don't be put off. Its OK. Use the time as practice. Social skills are just like any other, if you don't practice then you lose them. The thing we fear about speaking to other people is rejection, so I recommend that you face that head on, and phone people up while they are having their dinner and talk about double glazing or alarms or whatever (you won't have to worry about what to say they will give you a script), and I can guarantee that you will get rejection - loads of it, and you will realize that its not such a bad thing!! When you can laugh at the idiots who put the phone down on you, you are ready to make the next step and talk to real people about things that interest you - not double glazing!!!! Incidentally, you and I just had a conversation too - see, its not so hard!!!! Good luck
2007-02-08 11:51:39
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answer #2
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answered by deee999 2
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I know this sounds mad but try it and I bet it works for you. Practice smiling. In the privacy of your own home, do some smiling exercises. Smile as hard as you can until all the muscles in your face are aching. Do this for a week. Once you have done this try it out by saying for example to a female shop assistant that you like their hair (I know this sounds nuts) and watch the response you get. You will not regret it. Once you are past this barrier things will get easier and easier. The smiling exersises will change your face in a way that is more approachable and friendly. Hope you like the results, I dont like to see anybody lonely.
2007-02-12 11:31:49
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answer #3
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answered by Davy K 1
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I am antisocial myself. I went through two years in college before I talked to anyone. I woke up though. Just introduce yourself and ask if they want to study sometime. I have made a few good friends this way. As far as women go I can catch them on the bus, in a cab, at the store, or at the mall. I don't fraternize with female co-workers or classmates anymore. If you hit it and something goes wrong then you have to see them every day. Just open up and say "hi" to people. You too can blossom into a social butterfly ahh.
2007-02-08 11:33:28
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answer #4
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answered by eellixxerr 2
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Has no one ever mentioned to you at university that you dont talk to anyone? You would think that they would notice.
Join a club that interests you and then you know you will have at least one thing in common with everybody else there. Or talk to people in your class about what they are doing after they leave university what kind of careers they are going to do etc.
Good luck xx
2007-02-10 08:34:42
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answer #5
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answered by Lady Claire - Hates Bigotry 6
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First thing is to be interested in them, then ask them questions. Most people like talking about themselves and are flattered if others take an interest in them. So you could ask where they got their shoes, what is that funny colour drink they are drinking, wwhere are they from, just simple little questions to get them talking. The trick is, you really do need to be interested. People who are totally self absorbed, whether or not they chat a lot, are always boring
2007-02-08 11:37:13
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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go to a club and just go up to a woman and say
"fancy a drink"
there are 3 possible outcomes
1. she says yes and and the conversation will just flow.
2. she will say no then you explain that she is in the wrong place if she dont want to drink.again a conversation has started
3. her boyfriend will kick you *** in which case you have just met 2 people.
2007-02-08 11:36:25
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answer #7
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answered by Gary F 3
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start slowly and invite one person in your class for coffee/tea, in a public place. If necessary,prepare beforehand and plan something to talk about. Maybe they have a group of friends and in time you will be invited to meet them.
you could start with making eye contact with people and giving a smile when you see them.baby steps...
Good luck.
2007-02-08 11:41:50
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answer #8
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answered by tubby 2
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You could start by telling yourself talking to people is a usual routine. Just saying hie would'nt harm. You could find that the people you say hie to start the talking. Go 4 it!
2007-02-09 02:06:35
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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I'm affraid you have to stop being a doormat and put yourself out there.Approach people, say hello now and then, get out and do something to make your life interesting.Then, you'll have a lot to talk about and it will be easy to meet people.
2007-02-08 11:31:35
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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