Do you rely on your heart or your brain in relationships?

Question

I have always been a die-hard "follow your heart" kind of person when it comes to relationships. But, I've noticed that as I get older, my brain is starting to do most of the talking. What do you guys think?

Answer 1

I agree with you. When I was young, I followed my heart more. Guess it's part of being young and nieve. But I have found that following my mind and making logical decisions makes the relationship alot better. Once I felt "safe" in the relationship, THEN my heart could take over.

Answer 2

in reality it takes both because with out your brain you heart cant feel and with out your heart you cant live so you need both to be in a relationship you cant have one or the other you know it just cant work like that well in a relationship you must think before you act and sometimes your heart is telling you yes but you head is telling you no so you have to look at the situation and think should i do it or not basically use you common sense

Answer 3

Your heart isn't very smart. It will get you into trouble and doesn't learn from past mistakes.

Your brain making more decisions is a sign of growing maturity.

Your heart should have a say, but the final decisions should be made by your brain.

Answer 4

I relied on my heart and was married to a severe alcoholic for 27 years. then my brain took over, I filed for divorce, moved and changed jobs and I'm happier than I've been in a very long time. I vote for the brain to lead!

Answer 5

Listen to your brain!!! I wish i would have.I ignored all my intuitions and the things my Brain was telling me cause I was just too in love and ended up Very very screwed and now I am alone anyways with way more heartache then if I would have just done what I knew I should have in the first place.Trust me on this one Think dont react.

Answer 6

Feelings are just that.
Impermanent, a state, an intuition.
Based on subconscious beliefs of beauty and health.
Beauty which is also impermanent.
And as time passes, declines.
But wisdom, if developed rightly.
Survives even the passage of time.
And is passed upon from generation to generation.
And would give one supreme security and bliss.
Security that you would not be cheated, security that you would still be loved, security that s/he will remain true to you, etc.
That would be valued higher than even 100x the happiness gained, from following your feelings and getting instant gratification.

Answer 7

Use them in unison my friend. Our bodies only run when all our organs are in play, including the brain. So should the psyche. Harmony means things are running smoothly. If there is discord, something is out of sync...evaluate with distance and intelligence but listen to all "parties."

Answer 8

Of course. As you get older, you have more to lose and less and less time to get it back. You also have gained experience in judging people's character and compatibility as your mate, Do you want love without security, or do you want security and family with someone who is stable but no Don Juan? And you have a better assessment of yourself and be realistic about what you "deserve".

How long can one stay in the fast lane of hot cars and parties?

Answer 9

This is the silliest dichotomy I can imagine, yet it is persistent. it's pure superstition and not bourne out by modern neurology: both emotional and rational reasoning are manifestations of the whole cognitive process.

You emotions are no different than your reason: it's all cognition, and you must develop your emotional learning just like your rational reasoning. It's silly, superstitous, mumbo jumbo primitive reasoning to think that cognition is anything but cognition.

Or as the Budhists say, "awareness".

Answer 10

The heart can sometimes keep you blinded start listening to your brain.