he wants me to make sure I wash his clothes everyday or else its over! If I did not have time it means I am lazy.
2007-02-07 14:58:23 · 8 answers · asked by dragonlover 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No, I am not lazy. I go to school full time, I wake up at three-thirty in the morning to make lunch for his work and he sells to make extra money to pay the house, I babysit afterthe kids get out of school, and cook dinner, and try to clean-up around the house and whatever else needs to be done (bills,groceries,etc . But unfortunatley, there is only one of me.
2007-02-08 13:24:32 · update #1
Your husband can only be as controlling as you allow him to be. Women often teach their husbands how to act by what they put up with. Tell him in a nice way that you will be sure he always has clean clothes to wear but you do have many other things that take your time and if you can't get to the laundry, he can feel free to do his own.
2007-02-07 15:07:10 · answer #1 · answered by missingora 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Too late to set up ground rules. Ultimatum/decision time. If he was like that when you married him, did you expect that you'd change him? Never works. Find happiness in yourself...go out with the girls to lunch and talk about his behaviors with them. Ask their advice. Then.... have them and their significant others over for dinner a week later - by that time, their husbands will probably have the dirt about him by then and probably help you put his ego in check - Be coy. Make sure you cry once during this event if he hurts your feelings. A week later plan a vacation and run off with the girls (just the girls). Dance, flirt and have fun when you get there. Come back and then decide. If all your clothes are washed, dry cleaned, whatever AND put away -Money. If not move on to greener pastures. Good Luck
2007-02-07 23:27:35 · answer #2 · answered by regmanii 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is more to this story than you are telling us. I'm guessing that you are leaving out that parts about how you treat him. Or that maybe you've cut him off from sex, or you really are that lazy. Just because a man wants something done around the house, (assuming you are a housewife and this IS your job) doesn't mean he is "abusive" or "controling"
I'm sure he is not going to divorce you because his socks aren't folded, men are a little smarter than that. But there is something DEEPER and BIGGER going in your marriage that you aren't ready to own up. Like perhaps you have have emotional outburts and take them out on him, and it makes him feel like you are controling him.
Or maybe you never really do anything around the house and he is just sick of it. Maybe he figures if he can add a few idel threats you will shape up. But you see it as controling, where as he sees it as something else.
So, I know you aren't going to pick my answer as best, because none of waht I've said you want to hear. But I want you to look at your marriage and see what you could be doing wrong. And once you see what you're messing up on (nagging, being a b itch, making everyone make you the center of the universe, nagging, using sex as a controling tool, not having sex with him, arguing over minor issues, accusing him of cheating) then maybe you can find the REAL reason he is "making" you do a simple chore....
2007-02-07 23:14:09 · answer #3 · answered by Pandora 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's obvious that you're being abused. If he loved you, he wouldn't make you do all the work, and certainly wouldn't end things with you, over a simple, household chore. He is using you and abusing you, and you need to get as far away from him as possible.
In a normal relationship, a man would care about your feelings, and not belittle or degrade you. No one should ever try to control you, your life matters, and YOU deserve to be the center of attraction.
Can you stay with a family member or close friend? You need to pack your things and GET OUT as soon as possible. Things will never get better.
2007-02-07 23:05:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
This is an easy one. Divorce him. You do not deserve to be treated like dirt and his personal slave.
If you let him do this to you, he will keep doing it. Stand up for yourself.
If it means leaving him, what are you really losing? You can find someone out there that will respect you and treat you better.
I know it's hard, but it's worth it. Been there, got rid of him and found someone who really loves and respects me. He also treats me as an equal.
2007-02-08 02:11:04 · answer #5 · answered by Karen H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U have to suffer for what u have made out of him. U can change him slowly but not radically. Compensate him with some thing for the good work that he does under ur instructions.
2007-02-07 23:24:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good Lord, I have never been so tired of hearing about women who take this kind of abuse, and that is what it is, and just keep taking it and taking it, and not making a decision and get the he77 out of it.
Do you want you life to be like this??? Would you want to see your sister, friend, daughter to be in this life????
Kick these dime a dozen a@@holes to the curb, or get out yourself.
Life is what you make it.............life it what you make it!
2007-02-07 23:08:36 · answer #7 · answered by outtahere2day 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't wash them or i would bleach the crude outta them...Tell him to wash his own clothes...
2007-02-07 23:17:59 · answer #8 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋