My Heart says marry. whereas my Brain says DONT marry. Whom to listen and Why?

Answer 1

Your head. Your head is capable of analyzing and figuring out emotions (which can be really complex). Your "heart" or rather...emotions are just that. Emotions. They are automatic responses (feelings) that you feel as a response to stimuli in your environment and in things you are thinking. Emotions are like automatic summaries of stuff in your head and environment. Sometimes emotions need to be checked by thinking about why you are feeling them. Knowing the source (or thinking about them via introspection) can help you change the way you feel by giving you more understanding or perspective.

Answer 2

This is going to be long...be patient!
Somewhere between your heart (emotions, hormones, infatuation, etc.) and your head is the answer.
Your heart speaks the loudest, depending upon the level of experience and maturity you have. I know kids in grade school who believe they are in a love that "will never end." The next week they have someone else. Of course, I know adults who do the same kinds of things.
Your head can, at times, be too rational and you can think of 100 reasons not to marry this person. In between, in the core of your being, your spirit or soul, if you care to use those terms, is where you must sort this out.

Make a list of all the reasons why you should marry...no more than the top 10.
Make a list of all the reasons why you should not marry...at this time...again, the top 10 and be really honest.
Be sure you have considered the reality of income needed to live, common interests, including having or not having children.

Are your reasons for marrying this person all, or mostly emotional?
Are your reasons for not marrying this person actually real? (In this area you are looking for things they do when you are not around...flurting with other people? Kind or hurtful? Generous or stingy?

Finally, look at your two lists and the reasons for each. By this time you should have clarity. If not, seek out another trusted person who is in a good relationship and show them the list. Honestly, I would tend to trust their point of view if I am to emotionally caught up in the relationship to see clearly.
Remember...50% of all marriages end in divorce. The experts say that half that stay married should get divorced. They further say that of that last 25%...only one couple in 10 have a marriage that is one that is what marriages ought to be.
Don't you deserve to be among the one in ten?

I do wish you the best.

Answer 3

Symbolically speaking, the heart refers to emotions which come and go the brain refers to logic, which is based on reason. So i would listen to your brain. Also i have a question for you do you get sweaty palms around this person butterflies in the stomach, heart beating fast? If so the answer to your question is no don't marry. The brain secretes three chemicals that make up love dopamine serotonin and one other one that has to do with adrenaline. These combined give the effect of "love". But once the effects wear off is where the importance of love comes in.

Answer 4

Is this what your really saying :"I sure would like for him to be the way I need for him to be! "But it's sure obvious there's some serious issues that may lead to misery!"......Don't enter into any long term relationship until you've both had marriage counseling and discuss every issue both are carrying, dreams, goals, raising children, finances and how you will coordinate your efforts together is these areas. Also, bring out into the open the things that bug you about yourself and each other, dealing with it now in a loving constructive way will head it off at the pass, remember, all the details are revealed after marriage and usually a shock of reality that we handle with unrestrained emotion instead of patient ,council,and respect for each other as co-heirs together with Christ, (hopefully) . It's never 50-50, but 100-100. Marriage is a covenant, not a white dress,license,and a party. True love gives , it weathers storms together,growing into deep seated trust....Does this one measure up? Remember your the only person you can change(guaranteed) Are you both willing??

Answer 5

it means you dont like this person and so confused.when you like your heart and head will be in unison.
for every person ,it happens,they feel they are in love,later they know its not.maturity-some mature early ,some late.i
its waste of time to think a lot.move on confidently.a time will come when your heart and head will say yes.but for that you to actively look-out.then you will definitely meet the person.other option is to love whom your head likes.if you are not too perfect type ,then you will be happy.but if you dont compromise easily ,then even your head decides all good for you,you will not be happy.then you may try to break-up and start again but it will hurt.finally it depends on your personality,if you are compromising type-you should go with your heart.if your perfect type-then wait for that perfect,it depends on persistence of your will and your confidence,but keeping in touch with reality.
in the case of type-a personality,they constantly search for the perfect.in the end they know the truth.they will not listen to anyone.time is important.go on searching,and do it soon and learn by yourselves.
your brain is saying no because you dont like the person with all your heart 100 percent.move on

Answer 6

Your heart (emotion) is giving you a "feel good" answer. Your brain is weighing all of the information and giving you an intellectual answer.
There are so many broken relationships out there, probably the good majority are people who listened to their hearts, not their brains. Learn to trust your brain and although your heart may hurt temporarily, you'll make better decisions.

Answer 7

Follow your brain, as this is usually the organ that is used in logical decision making, there is obviously some reason that you do not want to marry the other person, listen to the voice of logic (your brain) and you will find the person that both your organs tell you to marry.

Answer 8

First you have to take a decision according to your brain analysis. If you are not getting any answer, you should lfollow your heart. Still you are not able to decide, put heads or tail and take the decision. The decision given by putting head or tail is god's decision, which will always be good for anybody.

All the best and don't delay your decision.

Answer 9

Ask your brain WHY it says 'Don't Marry'.
Imagine that your heart and your head are sitting at a table and discussing the potential of marriage. Allow your heart to make its presentation to your head and vice versa.
If a decision cannot be reached, decide to postpone your decision.
"Explain" to your heart that getting married 'tomorrow' is perhaps a better idea.

Answer 10

If your brain is telling you not to marry, that must be for a very good reason. Perhaps you know, deep down, that this person is not in it for life. Maybe you know that you can't really trust this person.

I know it's difficult to distinguish rational love from romantic love, but you really need to get away alone for a weekend to think about it. Once you marry, it will be much harder to change your mind.