Undersage sex...No protection...Help ?

Question

I have sent one before for same reason, not sure if it made sence.

I am 14 years old and I had sex with my boyfriend about 4 weeks ago without protection. My period was due about 4 days ago and it still hasnt come. I am not sure if its just late or im pregnant. I know firstly I should use a pregnancy test and I will get one.
I have told a friend and she has told me you can get secret abortions, and the doctor wont tell your parents. Is this true?
Also, if i am pregnant and planning an abortion, should I tell my parents or will they totally freak out? What should I say to them?
I totally trust my boyfriend, he has told me he will do anything for me and be with me all the way.
Can anyone help? A parent maybe?

Please no dirty remarks :) And thanks to the people who reply x

Answer 1

Oh really? Your hopefully below the age of 18 year old boyfriend has told you he will do anything for you! hahahaha im sorry but you should really be smarter next time.

Answer 2

you will have to have a parent aware of your abortion because your under 16 classed as a minor .

take a pregnancy test because you may just be late naturally and have your period within a week xxx take a preg test to put your mind at rest or to start thinking about how your going to go about your pregnancy ,

ive had a late period that didnt come for 2 weeks , i had neg tests and it was just the fact that i stressed about being pregnant , that my hormones went wild and made my period late,

be happy that your partner is there to support you , a baby is hard but its yours and you'll find yourself a routine you and your baby can cope with, your parents and friends will support you too. and you'll be quite happy x

dont metion to your parents until you've done a test , you dont want to worry them just yet ., x

an abortion is a big decision , that you will remember till your old and grey xx even though your 14 now , 9 months you'll be that little bit older, more used to the idea of the change in your life,

if you was to have an abortion now, then 2-3 months time you fall pregnant again would you have another one , it might set a high risk of infertility x

please hunny think about abortion seriously and dont feel pressured into it , its your body and your life , you will love your baby no matter what x so look to the future hun ,

have a soak in the bath xx and take a preg test in the morning x

good luck with your decision and if you are pregnant CONGRATULATIONS x xxx x x xx

Answer 3

First off, just remember that, no matter what happens, you'll be fine. I know this is probably stressfull, but you'll be ok.
Ok, now, I believe you can get an abortion without telling your parents (doctor/patient confidentiality), however, can you afford it. It's not very cheap. No one can answer this question for you unless they know your parents. If they're normally calm and open-minded, then yes, you should tell them. Remember, honesty is the best policy.
However, if they don't approve of your bf, or they're uber pro-life, I would try to hide it, you don't want them to make you have the baby if you are pregnant, you're too young and would not only ruin your own life, but your bf's and the babys.
I'm not going to lecture you on safe sex, but if you tell your parents, expect them too.
I suggest getting a box of many tests, and read all the instructions. My friend recently had a pregnancy scare, but it turned out to be a false possitive (which is EXTREMELY rare) because she did it wrong (who knew you could pee on a stick wrong). And remember that false negative happen too. If you get a negative (and I hope you do), take another test again in a few days. By then, if you are pregnant, your HCG (or hgc, I can't remember) levels will rise, which is what the test detects.

Answer 4

Talk to your parents (most times they will find out anyways), tell them that you made a mistake, you may be pregnant and have come to them for their help. Do not listen to your friends about secret abortions (these are dangerous people who are not recognized doctors and they do have legal or sanitary practices), a reputable doctor will not consent to doing an abortion on someone under sixteen. You made one mistake with your life don't make another one, talk to your parents as soon as possible.
As a parent (who has a fifteen year old daughter), let your parents in and give them time to overcome the anger, sadness, confusion and the shock of what is possible (baby). The trust they had in you is probably gone but can be rebuilt, unfortunately you have to make it happen. It's a long hard road and it's not going to be easy, if anything learn from this mistake. Vow never to be put in this situation and be responsible.
Remember though teenage girls are very fertile, most times no amount of protection will ever prevent unwanted pregnancies, having no sex is the only way to prevent them. Be smart and stop playing Russian Roulette with your life, you will lose in the end, it's just a matter of time.

Answer 5

Wow, well I think you should tell your parents. They might freak but you really should get them involved in this....I would wait it out a little longer though. Has your period ever been late before? 4 days is not really that long yet. Wait for about another week before taking a pregnancy test. If it comes out positive please tell your parents! If your to scared to tell them then tell an aunt or your counsler or school nurse. I know you said that your boyfriend will be there for you but you guys are sooooo young and people change. I'm a young mom, I had my son at 18. Me and his dad are still together and it is still VERY HARD!!!! If you aren't pregnant or plan on having an abortion, just make sure that you use protection!!!!!!!! You also might want to think about still talking to your mom about getting onto birth control.

Good Luck!

PS: I believe its against the law to give abortions to minors without parental consent

Answer 6

I am so sick of teenagers on her asking if they are pregnant what to do. I don't care how mature you think you are, You are not grown up for something w/ such major consequences. I don't think any 14 year old (in your case) Has any right to have boyfriends never mind having sex w/ them. They have free family planning clinics everywhere you don't need a parents consent you don't have to have money, you just make an appt and you go and get your Birth control pills. honestly I hope if you are pregnant you do have an abortion, no 14 year old can take care of the needs of a baby. If that baby has any chance at a decent life it would be raised by someone else and thats not fair to the family member that would take on that responsibility. Adoption is an even better option there are so many deserving people that can not have children, but then I worry that you wouldn't take care of the baby while you are pregnant.

Answer 7

your young and your period could be off track so make sure befor eyou plan anything out.
its wierd. ive always been against abortion and all for sucking up and dealing with what choice you made. But your soo young.
so so young. you have your whole life ahead of you and your not even in high school are you!?
having this baby which by the way you sound isnt even an option but think about what you have to live with for the rest of your life if you are pregnant and do get an abortion! i know you said no dirty remarks or be rude and im not saying this to be rude or mean or anything but you did this to yourself. you and your boyfriend. you had sex unprotected and now if you are pregnant you have to deal with what cards you dealt yourself. Im not sure what kind of doctor would give a 14 year old an abortion but im sure it couldnt be a good one. and do you want to take the chance of ruining yourself for the chance of having a baby when you met the right one? cause it could happen if the doctor messes up or does somehting wrong.
what it all comes down to is personal opinion and the choice you have thought about and can live with. could you live with killing a baby that didnt do anything to you? all because of your mistake.
there is always adoption.... have the baby give it up....
its all upto you just make sure you think long and hard about it.
its a serioud deal. get on birth control after you find out whats happening or stop having sex cause you obviously cant handle this situation.
I REALLY HOPE YOU START YOUR PERIOD.

Answer 8

Speaking as a parent, I would suggest that you talk to and tell your parents what's going on. Your friends notion about a secret abortion depends upon what state you are in and I think only one state allow abortions to be performed on a minor without parental consent. In most cases I think abortion clinics will error on the side of caution and demand parental consent.

Your parents might "freak out" at first but I think you will be glad you told them later depending upon wether or not you're pregnant and what you decide to do with that pregnancy. If your boyfriend is also 14 I wouldn't depend upon him too much. I know a couple 20-30 year old boys who can't handle fatherhood.

Your parents are going to give you the best advice/help. I would sit them down. Tell them what you are about to tell them is difficult for you and ask them to not "freak out". Now once you've told them don't expect to get away without some form of punishment (If you were my daughter you would be grounded for sure). But being grounded for a few weeks might be better than trying to navigate a relationship, pregnancy, and childbirth alone. Even if you decied to have an abortion you'll still have some recovery time and you won't "be back to normal" right away.

These are difficult things to deal with an any age. talk to your parents.

Answer 9

Definitely get a pregnancy test first - they are very accurate and should tell you what you need to know.

Trust me - IT IS POSSIBLE to have an abortion through organizations like Planned Parenthood without your parents' knowledge and consent. It might depend on where you live, but I know for a fact that a minor in the state of Oregon can have an abortion "secretly" for around $400. Voters here just rejected a bill that would require parental notification - so I don't know where these other people who say you can't are getting their info, but it is possible.

I would urge you to open the lines of communication with your parents. Abortions have physical and emotional ramifications and you will need all the support you can get.

Your parents might be upset at first, but I think that they will love you and support you either way. If my daughter came to me and admitted that she had made a mistake and was pregnant I would not love her any less - I would be glad that she trusted me enough to help her figure out her situation. That's what parents are for. I can't say that I wouldn't be disappointed - but that is just a side-effect of a not-so-good decision. I wouldn't be mad at her.

Good luck sweets - and please keep your parents in the loop.

Answer 10

I have never heard of secret abortions, and if they are out there you should not go that way. I think you should tell your parents, and of course they are going to freak you are only 14, but I think that is your best option. Legal abortions are alot of money that you or your boyfriend probably don't have. You will need an adults help if you are pregnant, bottomline. I know he says that he will be their the whole way, but raising a child is for most part on the mothers part. Tell your parents, get the anger and the yelling over with, so that you and your parents can make a good decision on what to do next.

Answer 11

I know exactly what your going through as i experienced the same thing. My boyfriend and I are both 18 though. And even though we are a few years older than you we were still petrified. I went to a health clinic and was informed that after your first time you can be up to 10 days late and that can last up to 3 months of late coming periods. Andthey say that you should only really worry about it then. But in any case get a test done they cheap and easy to do. Most are accurate from the first day of a missing period. My test was negative and my period arrived 6 days from my due day.

About your parents, maybe it would be best that you speak to them only once you've done the test. Even if your not pregnant talking to them may have it's positive outcomes.

Well Good Luck, let me know what happens, I'm holding thumbs for you