My parents have been divorced for about 5 years now. My dad has remarried and my mom has not. My mom and brother are still kinda bitter about it. I don't blame them. At times I feel the same way. But for a long time I've had this feeling that I have to choose sides. They will make jokes about my dad and his wife's weight problems or complain about them, and I end up feeling bad for them and defensive. If I act like it bothers me, my brother will claim that I love my dad and step-mom more than my mom. Which I don't. I love them all the same. I wouldn't even think of joining in on it. Sometimes my brother's friends will pitch in their idiotic remarks too, because they think if my brother does it that it's ok. But that bothers me even more, because all they know is what my brother tells them.I understand that they haven't gotten over the divorce. I try to stay neutral in it all, but it's hard sometimes.
2007-02-07 05:31:39 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
just tell them theyre not helping the situation....sometimes their silence could be golden if they would listen...i dont discuss my X with my daughter cuz its her Dad and she cant understand that he stunk as a husband!
2007-02-07 05:35:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really can't win in these things.
They are divorced. You should not tolerate them bad-mouthing the other. My parents divorced years ago. My father simply does not discuss my mother unless he has to, and even then he does so in civil, respectful terms. If my mother is upset about something she will still call him terrible names and things like that. I just tell her I don't need to hear it. They have been separated/divorced for 10 years and they cannot blame each other for anything anymore.
2007-02-07 13:36:55 · answer #2 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe 1st talk to your dad about it, tell him whats going on, be honest, he can take it, I'm sure he knows already. Ask him what you should do, ask him how you can get past this and still keep peace. But really your brother and mom really need to get over it!
2007-02-07 13:36:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why explain anything. If they ask, answer, if not, then don't worry about it.
If they don't listen or don't believe, then they don't.
Relax, and try not to allow others to bother you.
People are all different, so you can love your father without loving the circumstance.
2007-02-07 13:36:09 · answer #4 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say straight out to each of them, "I'm not going to be caught in the middle of this and I'm not taking sides. I won't tolerate anybody bad-mouthing anybody else. Don't do it when I'm around, period."
And if they do it anyway, you need to get up and leave. Show them that you won't listen to it. Good luck!
2007-02-07 13:36:06 · answer #5 · answered by Gen•X•er (I love zombies!) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them to grow up and stop making fun of them. they are obviously acting out because they are not over the divorce. just tell them to stop it and that what's done is done and there is nothing they say or do that is going to change that.
2007-02-07 13:36:15 · answer #6 · answered by Coolltw2003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your mum to stop disrespecting your father and his new wife when your mum stops then your brother will stop because if your brother sees your mum behaving like this he thinks its right, and who is he going to repect then if he doesnt repect his own father?
and your brothers friends do not have anything to do with this situation and tell them to keep out.
2007-02-07 13:36:59 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you got over it and are mature enough to accept it. Making fun of other people, now that's real mature, eh?
2007-02-07 13:37:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
simply say nothing and don't allow yourself to get in the middle...5 years and still bitter...they need to move on with life...life is simply too short...however, it is their choice
2007-02-07 13:41:50 · answer #9 · answered by sunbun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋