my girlfriend and i have been dating for 2-3 months. we have a strong emotional connection and we have a good thing going right now. we're contemplating marriage in a few months. she is an extrovertish personality and has been in relationships in the past, which according to her, ended against her will. she appears to be over these relationships, but i can't say for sure. she has also confessed that she is not a virgin. on the other hand, i am a virgin and more introvertish in nature. however hard i try, i find it hard to accept that she has been with other men..i really like her and i think she complements my personality quite well, but her past (known and unknown to me) bothers me. how do i decide whether to make a lifelong commitment?
2007-02-07 03:06:26 · 7 answers · asked by gametime 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get over the fact that she has been with other men. If you leave her then you will face this problem with the next girl you meet. It is rare to find virgins this day in age so you need to get over yourself. 2-3 months is to short to be planning marriage anyway. You need to just give the relationship time and eventually you will love her and forget about her past. She did nothing wrong. It was her life and her decisions to make and it is not your place to make her feel guilty about that. If you are secure in yourself then that would not bother you. I think it is admirable to wait until you are married, but it is not right to condemn her because she did not. If you really like her then you should give her a chance and get over yourself. Like i said earlier, 3 months is to soon to be making this decision. After you guys have sex then her past will not matter to you anymor
2007-02-07 03:22:28 · answer #1 · answered by micah z 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you give this relationship a little more time before you think of marriage. You are already haveing a hard time with the fact that she has more experience than you. It is 2007 and most women have had past experiences with men. If you love her and she loves you, what does it really matter if she has been with other men as long as it hasn't been hundreds of them. You can always go to church and find a virgin if that makes you feel better.
2007-02-07 03:13:42 · answer #2 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need to get to know each other more before you even think about getting married. 2-3 months is not a long time, not nearly long enough to get to know each other. I think that you need to give it another year or two before you even think of the marriage idea. If you find it so hard to accept her past, that is a good reason why this may not work. Take your time and don't rush into anything.
2007-02-07 03:41:43 · answer #3 · answered by Jess_DH13 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her past is her past and neither you nor she can do anything to change it. If you truly love her and are thinking about marrying this woman then you have to let go of her past. If you can't find a way to do that then you won't be able to commit yourself to her completely and you shouldn't be talking marriage at all. If she is over these relationships they shouldn't be an issue.
2007-02-07 03:11:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should stay dating for a while longer. if you "really like her" and don't use the word love, you are not ready! and you've only been together for 3 months? you've got the rest of your life! relax and enjoy the ride! don't rush into anything you may regret later
2007-02-07 03:14:27 · answer #5 · answered by Carrie H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should date for a few more years before you think of marriage. Seriously.
2007-02-07 03:10:59 · answer #6 · answered by Zimone78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever her actions were in the past have absolutely no bearing on you. Her past is what makes her....her. So drop it.
2007-02-07 03:13:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋