ive been in a relationship with my current BF for over a year now, lately im getting tired of all the time i have to spend with his friends, we hardly get to see eachother as it is as i work and go to uni.
ve been getting fed up for quite a while now - its always me that has to drive to his house, he never comes to mine even though he knows he is welcome. He never even offers to pick me up.
Last night he really annoyed me as him and i were supposed to be going to this new restaurant, then he decides to invite all his mates, and didnt even bother to tell me until the last minute. So i walked out on him, and told him im leaving him.
Last night he told me that he wanted to be with me for man years to come and that he was willing to wait until i finish uni, i guess to start our lives properly thogether.
He never makes the effort with my family or friends, now he is making me feel guilty, but my family say i did the right thing as they could see he was taking me for granted.
2007-02-07 02:06:59 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Have i done the right thing?
2007-02-07 02:11:27 · update #1
It was to be just me & him going to restaurant - then he invited all his mates btw.
2007-02-07 02:19:09 · update #2
Just wanted to say thanks to you all, its good to have some other people to talk to and give me advice :-)
2007-02-07 02:26:48 · update #3
im free
2007-02-07 02:45:00 · answer #1 · answered by traveller 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
yes you've done the right thing and stick to it girl! Firstly i'm well proud of you for looking out for yourself and making sure you great treated the way you want, nothing less. He's now going to say everything he can think of to pull on your heart strings and get you back, but please dont fall for it because he will not change. If you go back he will sooner or later slip into his old ways and you will feel silly and low for giving him the chance and then when you end it again wont take you seriously cos he won you back before. Move on girl with your pride intact, you will feel far better in the long run! I'm speaking from experience.. i followed this pattern for 4 yrs with an ex of mine, it was ridiculous! i wish i stuck to my word at the time cos i would have had a lot more self respect! You will meet someone perfect soon that will treat you just how you want to be treated and then you'll wonder why you were with that loser! Good luck! Be strong!!
2007-02-07 02:17:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing!! By the sounds of it you are not more important than his friends. If you were to get back to him I would suggest that you make some ultimatums. Like tell him that you want a certain number of days where it is just you and him, and if he want to spend time with his friends then he does it on days when he is not seeing you. That's not to say you do not ever have to spend time with his friends occassionally, but it has to be balanced. Also tell him that he has to make an effort to visit you rather then you always visit him. A relationship should be equal, it should not always be on his terms. What ever decision you make though don't feel guilty - you have the right to be happy. Put your happiness and your priorites first. Under no circumstances get back with him out of guilt or pity for him!
I would though just move on!! It doesn't sound like he will change to me!!
2007-02-07 02:14:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feeling guilty is not a reason for keeping on a relationship. You must have done the right thing as there is no mention of regret for reasons of deep love etc. Had you worded the question as you have then ended up saying something like "Despite the way he has been treating me I still love him" then is would have been questionable if the relationship was over for good. Just now get your life back again, study hard and play hard!!!
2007-02-07 02:58:17 · answer #4 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know if u have done the right thing ... but being together for a year and just because he did not invite u to the restaurant u told him that its over ? have u talked before with him about the things that bother u ?
well what can i say ? its not good to take this serious decisions just because of a mood
how do u feel now but i guess i dont need to ask , u now have doubts ..... well , if u really love him talk to him and tell him what u think
good luck
2007-02-07 02:17:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Emma
I am not exactly sure what it is you are asking?
I guess it is if you have done the right thing?
I think only you know the answer to that.
It is hard to work & study as it is very tiring & makes it hard to find any time for 'special times together' which you obviously would like to have with him.
He should think himself lucky that you are there when he wants you to be.
He dosnt seem to be aware of how important it is to you, to make time to be alone with you.
You must not feel guilty for wanting time alone with him,
I am sure there are plenty of men who would love to have a woman like you & who would love to share special times with you & treat you right.
So dont settle for less
2007-02-07 16:21:01 · answer #6 · answered by healer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is perfectly normal! Just rememer that you bf is your lover and your best friend! Being normal, funny and open is part of a healthy relationship. Even tho money is an issue, things will work out fine!
2016-05-24 02:52:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell him what you told us. Tell him you want to take some time apart and date other people. If he really loves you he will understand and try his hardest to get you back. I think that you can do better, but just see how things go from there.
2007-02-07 02:13:31 · answer #8 · answered by Chrissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So your single now... great, i know you can go out with me! lol
No but seriously, if you feel like that maybe you should have time apart and do your own things for a while.?
If two people truly want to be together, they will no matter what!
2007-02-07 02:15:00 · answer #9 · answered by roberto 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Taking him back is easy but trusting him by wat he says is a different thing. All u can do is think about it 4 a little while. Don't go running back 2 him though because it makes u look 2 eager. This is just 1 of them things where only u can decide. Leave him 4 a little bit though because it wil make him realise wat an important part u play in his life.
2007-02-07 02:13:47 · answer #10 · answered by x x Sxc gyal x x 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No doubt that you did the right thing. His behaviour suggests that he probably wanted to end the relationship but did not have the courage to do so.
2007-02-07 02:15:43 · answer #11 · answered by Clive 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋