my husband text a lady that he loves her. 'What can i do?

Question

i confrontted him and he tells me i shld forgive and he will nebver communicate with her. Later i discover he use to phone her after the incidence what can i do

Answer 1

Make sure he is getting what he needs at home, then maybe he would not be tempted to stray. Give this a good shot, if you want to keep your man. If this does not work then he will have to make a choice.

Answer 2

Do you know how long this has been happening? If is the beginning stage, you might still be able to convert him back. Maybe you can talk(calmly) to him and find out why he needs to do this? If is something about you that he doesn't like, then maybe you two can agree on a solution to meet half-way. But, if he is BSing you and unwilling to explain his action, then he is probably doing it for thrills & adventures. If that's the case, there is no point for you to stay with him any more. He will continue doing it, until, one day he is enlighten by some type of extraordinary/life-changing event. Collect evidences(hire private investigator) and take him to court. Do not feel guilty if you did nothing wrong...but don't be in denial if you know you made a mistake.

Answer 3

I had a similar problem with my husband. He was having cybersex with an old relation. He said he would never do this again. Damage done, trust is broken. It is cheating I do not care how you add this up. Also, I did check his mail for awhile. But when you reach the point of I just do not care, well. Trust is earned, once broke it takes along time to regain.

They just do not know how much they can mess up doing this.

I know what you are going through.

Good Luck!!

IT is not You it is him. He has the problem!!

Answer 4

You need to definetly confront him. Ask him what was the purpose of the text. Tell him to be totally honest. Ask him how he would feel if you did the same thing. Try not to holler but just talk to him calmly, if he can't get his facts straight then do like Beyonce and say "to the left, to the left everything you own in a box to the left" and kick his butt out...and get your alimony.

Answer 5

he is cheating on u and also lying about how important she is to him. he made u a promise than went back on it. there is nothing u can do u gave him the ultimatum to stop this relationship with her, and he hasn't so u kind of know where u stand. if the marriage were his priority he would have stopped this immediately not tried to go behind your back by calling her again, his heart is not with u, and u need to accept this, and figure out what it is u want to happen here. personally i would rather leave someone and get hurt than continue to live with him and keep getting hurt over and over again. he shows nothing that suggests he is willing to give her up. sometimes we just have to cut our losses and divorce him, because this is so disrespectful to u, when we are married we have a right to expect to be the one and only in the relationship if we are not we need to leave it and maintain our dignity.

Answer 6

I would lay it on the line for him. Tell him you will not tolerate this. Suggest counseling, or have a heart to heart talk with to try and find the reasons he feels he has to go outside of your marriage. If it doesn't stop, you have to act on it, otherwise he will continue to betray you. Just don't take this inward and blame yourself....like a lot of women do. He is the one who is betraying you, and he must pay the consequences. If he doesn't change after counseling, or your talk...then I would let him know that you are serious by either making him leave, or you leaving...even if it is on a temporary basis. This will show him that you are serious, and that you deserve his TOTAL love and respect.

Answer 7

Make him choose and tell him to move out until he is sure that he knows what he wants. In the meantime sue her fro alienation of feelings. That will get rid of her quickly, oh and sue for a large sum of money too. THey run like the hounds when that happens. Guarenteed she has no money! Maybe your husband has male menopause (mid-life crisis) better termed PENOPAUSE!!!!

Answer 8

Hi Dear , FIGHT FOR YOUR MARRIAGE FIRST (IF YOU LOVE HIM) IF YOU DON'T LOVE HIM LET IT GO...................
If you love your husband girl ,you can't just let him what ever he wants to do ,listen to me please don't ever trust a maN they're unfaithful must of the time, you need to know how to play them.Confront him it's one thing ,you need to show him that you don't play . First of all ,you're is wife not his girlfriend which is mean you got the power ,the other woman might not know if he's married or not ,remember they lie most of the time , he might say that he married and he doesn't get alone with you . Please don't call the girl . why ? because you need to deal with your husband the girl might think that you don't believe in yourself, and that can make thing worst so :
-don't make love with him for a little while
-you have the right to answer his cellphone (why you're his wife for)
-don't simle to much
-try to make yourself more pretty than usually
-act mysterious
-but be nice , keep taking care of him if you do
-don't let him go out without you
There's so many staff that you can do to save your marriage if he loves you and if you love him.....SSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BE A WOMAN- BE A WOMAN PLEASE

Answer 9

Get ready for the breakup. If you can't trust him then it's time to prepare yourself for the next phase. Let him know that you know that he lied to you and if it doesn't stop you want out. Keep checking up on him because you now know that you can't trust him.
If you are lucky he will stop, or he will find another way to communicate with her like email chat rooms. Good luck

Answer 10

i dont know how long you've been married to him and if you have kids so i cant really answer this. but i think that if he promised you once that he'll never communicate with her again and still did it, you should not forgive him a second time. i mean if you forgive him AGAIN, he'll think that you forgive him anyways and he'll do it again and again and again. OR, you could tell him that you are serious and that this is REALLY REALLY the last time that you forgive him and IF he does it again, you know what to do. LEAVE HIM. no matter what. no second thoughts.
but again, the answer to this question changes, depending on how long you've been married, if you have kids & etc.
good luck with everything.