How is it that you can love someone that you?

Question

distance yourself from if you think its for their or your own good?

I just saw a question that asked: Have you ever distanced yourself from someone you love for their own good? And one of the responses said, no but for my own good.

I only avoid and distance myself from people I dislike. If you love someone shouldn't you be there for good and bad times? I'm confused...thanks.

Answer 1

I have distanced myself from one of my sisters before.I felt like I had no choice.She was verbally being abusive to me,my husband and my children.leaving her children with me for days on end and not telling any one where she was(most of the time at her boyfriends house),I would lend her money(and never get it back) because she she said that she needed it for rent,only to find out that she wanted to go to a beauty salon to get a face mask and her eyes brows waxed.I felt really bad when I distanced myself from her,mainly because I didn't get to see my nieces,and I missed out long chats and just hanging out with each other,but I could no longer allow myself ,nor my husband and children to be treated like a door mat.But now I am really glad that I did do it,because when I distanced myself from her,she had no choice but to learn to become a good mother(and she is a great one now)and I have learnt what my boundaries are and I have learnt that it's o.k to say no to people to things some times.

Answer 2

Well you see...the reasons as to why people distance themselves from someone they love for their own good are very complicated....cuz you see, you can fall in love with a "bad guy", and even if you know that he´s not good for you, you cant help how you feel, you know? So the only thing to do, is distance yourself so that you wont get hurt....even though in a way you´ll still be hurt cuz you´ll miss him and everything...but in the long run, it could be the best thing to do, especially if there´re kids involved.

Another reason might be that you could be self-destructive, and so not allow yourself to be happy...and moment you realize you´re falling in love with someone, you immediately back away before more "damage" is done.

People all have their own individual and personal reasons for keeping their distance from the ones they love...so i cant really say them all.. But i hope i´ve at least been of a little help. :)

Answer 3

I'm more or less with you, but then I've never been in the spot. I'm sure there are instances where someone realizes they were holding the person they love back from accomplishing something - college, athletic competition, job - and called it off for the benefit of the other person. Or perhaps someone who was terminally ill who broke off a relationship to spare the person the pain of watching them die.

Seeing someone break off a relationship with someone they lover for their own good seems like it would be more common. Maybe it's a woman who wants to get married but she feels her boyfriend won't make the commitment. Maybe it's a battered spouse who leaves for their own safety or the safety of a child. We can't always choose who we love but we can certainly stop being with that person if it is bad for us.

Answer 4

Every situation is different. The idea of putting distance between someone and you for reasons of abuse, drugs, drinking and hurting you is for your own good. I have seen relationships that were unhealthy for both and nothing worked to make it better so distance was the best choice.

Answer 5

Hello,
Love is very sublime and Divine. Physical nearness is something very superficial involving only visible form like presence etc. But for Love, form is not required , as it encompasses the soul . Soulful actions are near to heart and mind not the body. So if loving a person from distance is good for both, keeping away from them is totally justified . One need not become sad in doing so. In fact that is the perfect Love...seeking happiness for the beloved from wherever you are. Hope I made my point clear.

Answer 6

I have to agree with you, I can't imagine any reason why I would want to distance myself from someone I love. Like you, I only distance myself from people I care nothing about.!!!

Answer 7

Sometimes people love and care about someone that is not good for them. In these instances it is best to distance yourself,to prevent them from hurting you any further.It also lets the other person know that they hurt you and it's unacceptable.

Answer 8

All I can say is true love is very rare to find ~ people wait for a lifetime and yet they dont find it. So if you're the lucky one who eventually found it then consider yourself as extremely lucky and know this love as a unique gift from God. Most often he has a specific reason for sending him/her to your life.so all I would say is when you find it, just cease it with all your might and never let it go for who knows one day you may look back and regret!!

Answer 9

Easy, I fell madly in love with a woman who was married, that was 27 years ago. And she'd fallen in love with me. It all started innocently enough, it just happened, no warning, no planning, love hit! She was at the stage she was prepared to leave her husband, although I guess she was a little indecisive. I walked away after she said she needed me to make the decisions for "both of us", so I did, to preserve her marraige before any harm was done. And hey, I still love her for what it's worth!

Answer 10

If you'd ever been in a destructive abusive relationship you would understand. You cant help who you love, but sometimes you have no choice but to walk away... either that or maybe next time the blow could end up being lethal.... your choice