Parents !! I don't like talking to my father. How do I explain something to him.??

Answer 1

Ok, here is my opionion. I wouldn't write him a letter, if it is something important, you need to tell him face to face. I know it would be really hard, but things are never going to get better between you two, if you just give him a letter.

Forcing yourself to enter into a conversation with him, as uncomfortable as it will be, may end up making you a stronger person in the end.

I would start by getting you and your father in a room just you two, have some coffee, tea, whatever you like, so there is something there to kinda mess with (always helps me if things get a little difficult to mess with something, like stir my coffee and so on). Just straight up tell him, "Dad, I have something I need to say, and I would really appreciate it, if you would just let me say what I need to, before you say anything". That way it will give you a chance to get everything out in the open and say what you need to before he has a reaction. Then open it up for discusion.

I know a letter would be easier, or e-mail, but who ever got stronger from just hiding from behind their computer or a piece of paper to discuss a problem. I think it has ALWAYS been much better to hear something, good or bad, face to face. Then you can see their reaction, words can be read wrong, causing even more problems.

Hope that helps!

Answer 2

It sounds like a big problem. Some children do things that ruin their life, like drugs or law problems. It sounds like you are not at this point yet, so, and this would be sort of fun, make your father schedule an appointment with you. Make him know that your time and opinion are important and that if he misses out on this, then there will be consequences. Such as, do you do chores? Keep up in your homework? These things might change if he misses his appointment with you. Are you drug free? That might change if he doesn't take the time to listen to you.

Etc, I know I don't have the whole story but you should make all efforts possible to communicate with someone before taking other steps, and I was just adding that the drug thing was a possibility, don't do them. I just know that doing drugs is a symptom of neglect, and that unless your father acts/communicates now, the percentages are that kids will go to this extreme to get their parents to listen to them.

It might be hard for you, but maybe let down your guard a little bit, also when talking with him. It sounds like there is a history there about why it is so difficult for you to talk with him, but please do.

Answer 3

Remeber that he is your father and he loves you regardless. Just be honest. I seen your other question and it sounds like you may have made a bad choice, even though innocent. Your dad is only trying to protect you and prevent bad things from happening to you. He has to draw the line somewhere in order to set some kind of ground rules. Being a teenager is tough. I was one too a long time ago. Sometimes parents do things that we think are unfair at the time. But, their intentions are good. Your dad remembers what it is like to be a 17 year old boy and he knows what goes through their mind at that age. Maybe that's why he reacts the way he does. Just remember that he loves you. If he didn't, then he would let you do what ever you wanted to. Just try talking to him. He may surprise you. He could be just as frustrated with you as you are with him.

Answer 4

Tell your father you find it hard to talk to him, but you need somebody to talk to and you would prefer to talk to him since he is your father. He will probably be blown away at how mature and honest your approach is that he should be more than willing to sit down with you and have an honest one on one talk with you. Being a teenager and a parent of a teenager is very difficult for everyone. You shouldn't be surprised but he is probably feeling the same way you are about how strained your communication is. Take the first step and he should follow.

Answer 5

My father and I have trouble talking aswell sometimes. The best thing I can recommend is just to try. Tell him that this is hard for you and hopefully he will try to help communicate. Everytime you actually do it, it will get easier. Try writing down what you want to say and go over it, then bring the notes with you to help you get it all out. Also, I found it helped me if we made a time every week to sit down to talk about whatever - school, tv, sports, problems, family etc. Pratice makes perfect! Good luck!

Answer 6

I don't know what you want to say, but when I do presentations at work they follow this kind of pattern:
Welcome
The Problem we are trying to solve (aka the Opportunity)
If that's the problem, here's the solution (include benefits to customers)
Solution Step 1
Solution Step 2, etc
Summarize - this is a managable solution that will benefit customers and not overtax our resources

It's like writing a paper at school - create an outline, understand what's important for him to hear and be ready with answers to objections you think he might have.
Find a way to frame your argument.

Answer 7

Lots of kids (even grown up kids) have a hard time talking with their dads. It is interesting to see how many people have recommended that you write down what you are thinking in a note and give it to your dad.

This might be an ok short term solution but it really doesn't seem to be a good long term strategy.

The important thing is to be able to talk with your dad. Some dads come home from work very tired and so you may just want to tell him that you want to talk to him but that maybe he could tell you when the best time to sit down together would be. Let him know how much time you think you might need.

If you are going to write him a note perhaps just write him a sweet little note telling him that there is something important you would like to talk to him about and let him know you want to set aside some time to just talk with him.

Find a place in your house where you can sit down together comfortably and talk without interruption (away from a tv that is turned on or in the middle of the kitchen right before dinner time).

Before you start talking to him let him know that you have been a little apprehensive (or unsure... or afraid... whatever feeling you are feeling) about talking with him. Let him know how important is to you to be able to talk to him.

Without knowing what it is that you want to explain maybe tell him what you expect before you begin your explaining. If you just want him to listen before jumping in - tell him that. If you want his help with a problem - tell him that. If you want to tell him about some trouble you have gotten yourself into tell him that you love him and you want to make everything right and you don't want him to be mad at you - tell him that.

It sounds like you may not talk with your father very much right now and so it may be a little awkward at first but it is good to be able to talk with him. There may come a time in your life when you really really need him and you will want to be able to talk with him.

When you tell him how important it is to you that the two of you talk you may be surprised how much easier it is to talk to him than you thought.

Answer 8

There are plenty of people in this life that you will have to talk to and you may not enjoy it. A boss, for instance. A doctor, for instance. But you have to adjust and make the effort. That's just life.Often, the other person doesn't really like talking to you but they have to listen to you anyway! If they make the effort to do that, give them credit. You make the effort too!

Answer 9

Try this. Write everything down you wish you could say, including all the stuff you wouldn't say in a million years, like, "I think you're being a jerk." Save it overnight. The next day, read what you wrote and edit it for adult conversation, being as straight-forward as possible. Then, read it to another adult first, and ask them for their reaction. Listen to their suggestions without being defensive, and make necessary changes. When they say you sound mature, respectful, and have good points, then rewrite it neatly and give or read it to him.

Answer 10

If you have a hard time talking to him, maybe you can write him a note or drop him an e-mail. If you have something important to say to him...it is best to do so!!!Your best bet is to stay respectful....but go right to the point!!