should I make the deal with the prenup or ??

Question

okay so this gentleman in the Navy asks me if i would be willing to have a prenup agreement with him for his financial and ranking position within the militarysomething about if hes "married" hes able to move forward in rank??-keep in mind- I have NO relation/ship with this individual He just made me an offer i feel i shouldnt pass and need help to figure if its fraud and if not,? how it couldnt be? just seems too good to be true- but the deal is do the prenup thing,stricktly business(no living,sex,ect..)he also states,in return for medical insurance and extra monthly $$? I am in desperate need for this help right now in my life and wondering if i should take the chance but need to know how to go about it saftley in all aspects?? does anyone get what im trying to say here? if so please help-thank you in advanced for your time and concideration with this matter.Just yound and struggling in need of help.

Answer 1

As a retired Air Force wife I do have some knowledge in this field. Your gentleman friend is absolutely right. As you go up in rank, a single man does not advance quickly in rank if he is not married. A single man is thought of as unstable and possibly gay which is still a no-no in the military.

A decision to marry is a tough one under normal circumstances. It looks like your friend is in a tough position. I would sit down and speak frankly to him about what "type" of marriage this would entail. Do you have the strength to be married in name only. The military looks down upon women who have marriages in name only (no cheating). You would be basically giving up a chance to fall in love with someone.

Marriage is not just about sex. It is also about companionship, friendship, and trust. I would urge you to trust your heart. Make a decision that is in your best interest. Money and insurance can be had eventually. If you don't trust it, don't do it. If you are willing to be with someone in "name only" then you have made your decision based on you and not what a bunch of strangers have to say on yahoo answers.

A prenup agreement is just an agreement which states what a person would get in case of divorce. It can be overturned in case of fraud. This might qualify.

Good luck to you.

Answer 2

A Pren up is a way to protect the valuables a person brings to the marriage. If either or both have any properties that they bring with them to the marriage, those things remain their sole assets and the other person has no claim on them. Lets say that you have real estate and stocks that you inherited. As long as you keep those assets separated from your current joint accounts they could remain your sole property with a Prenup. The problem would be if you co mingled the accounts in which case you could nullify the prenup. If there are not inheritances or other large values to be kept separate, then there is little or no reason for a prenup. Writing up these agreements provides a good source of income for some lawyers, If that is to your liking. I am not a fan of Prenups, I tend to think of them as writing out the divorce and property settlement before even getting married.

Answer 3

I have never, ever heard that a military service person needs to be married to gain rank. In fact it used to be the other way around in many Navies because they didn't want officers distracted by home life while at sea for months. To me this sounds really strange. If you have no relationship, why did he make this offer to you? Why would you want to marry someone for "strictly business"?

I think you really should pass on this. I don't know what his motivations are in this, but it feels to me like he's taking advantage of your situation. I understand it seems hard right now, but there must be something else you can do besides getting into a sham marriage. You could end up getting seriously stuck. I wish you well, but you really need to think about this objectively. If you weren't struggling, would this even be an issue?

Answer 4

How well do you know this man? I don't know what your situation is...if you need the medical for a valid reason or if you just need the money, but you should think about what this means, to have it reversed will also be expensive. Are you ready to get into legal trouble for it? What kind of trouble would you get into if caught (depending on state, country). I always find that it can come back and bite you in the @ss when you do something you know you shouldn't. Good luck, I hope that what you decide works out for you and your gentleman friend.

Answer 5

I think he is just scaming to get married to you. Its better to be single in the military than married because of required tours they need to do. By him marrying you will not help in his promotion unless he needs emotional support to him motivated. No the situation is not fraud b/c you will be marrying based on convenience. This is done everyday.

if you want to marry him for the benefits that military provides, free housing, medical care, trips to the commissary then go ahead. But, you need to tell him, if he marries you he can't have sex with anyone else. If he is caught cheating he could lose his rank and ruin a chance to be promoted every again.

My question, what rank is he trying to get? All he has to do is take some darn test in his field and pass a PFT.

Answer 6

Miss Brie, I think you should try working things out on your own. No matter how good the deal might sound, there are way to many strings attached that could be detrimental to you in the future. If you yourself are a legal expert, then maybe it could be worth the risk. However I don't believe you should attempt such a task without absolute and complete understanding of the legal results. I personally think that getting a complete comprehension of legalities is almost impossible in today's system. Don't try it please!

Answer 7

I am the wife of a 31 year military veteran, and I can tell you that being married is NOT REQUIRED FOR BEING PROMOTED IN RANK. In fact, the military has a saying, "If the military wanted you to have a wife, we would issue you one".

So, this is some kind of scam or trick, or the guy is just a creep. I'd walk away...no, on second thought...............I'd run.

Answer 8

A prenup proves nothing. A marriage license does and the Navy will request one from him. Think I'd pass this up if I were you.

Answer 9

This proposal reeks of fraud and the signed prenup could be the smoking gun that gets you both convicted of same, and rightfully so.

Answer 10

I just don't think it sounds like he is telling you everything. When my husband was in the Navy the Officer over him once told him, "if we wanted you to have a wife, we would of issued you one."