Morons need not answer. Serious answers only!!?

Question

Since too many idiots answered my first question, I'll ask again. How do you deal with letting a guy know he's going to be a dad if the conception occurred because of a one night stand? I do not know if I am, just worried I COULD be. I am on birth control, have been for five years. I did go out with this guy a couple more times but havent spoken to him recently. I know he'd love to be a father; just worried......any suggestions??

Oh yeah, I am not planning on saying a word till I know for sure!

No paternity test would be needed...he knows he's the only guy I've been with since November!

Sigh. People are so f-in cruel on here.

Answer 1

First wait to make sure that you are indeed make sure that you are pregnant. Telling him that you might be will only add stress on you right now. Then after finding out you are, you need to tell him and if there are any other men that may be the father, then tell them and be honest with everyone involved. I am not suggesting that anyone else could be, nor am I being judgemental, because these things do happen. Then just go from there as to what decisions need to be made or how you are going to get through this. It will be scary for you I am sure, but just be honest and brave no matter what decision that might be facing. Dad can't be too upset with you, because you are on birth control and everyone knows that it is not always hundred percent effective. Yes I am sure that before, and even now you will get people telling you why didn't you use a condom, blah, blah, blah, but again we have all been in the position where we are not thinking with our heads where hormones are involved and now that the deed is done, there is no sense in anyone brow beating you, because I am sure you have done plenty enough on yourself for a long time to come. Anyone who says that no they never let their passion get away with them and always use condoms are lying, so hold your head up and ignore the people who may judge you here, or elsewhere in your life. I do think that you should tell the dad if you are pregnant, because if he is any kind of man at all will be with you through this, just wait until you know for sure. To find out before your next period is due, call your Dr and get a blood test done, that way you can take or not take your birth control safely, because if you are pregnant then it is potentially harmful to the baby. I wish you strength and braveness.

Answer 2

I think it would be best if you find out for sure if you are pregnant before you start worrying. If you are then I would phone this guy and ask to meet him either at home or in a place where you could talk uninterrupted. Explain to him all that has happened and why ,including the birth control, and see how he reacts. Maybe he'll be over the moon if he wants to be a dad. You also have to decide what you want to do whether he wants to be a dad or not. It's you who will be carrying the baby for 9 mths, giving birth and everything else that comes with being a mum. It is a huge responsibility and the decision will, ultimately, be yours as to what happens next if you are pregnant. I wish you well.

Answer 3

I'd go find out for sure first, get a blood test done to find out yes or no for sure, I don't trust the plastic strip tests. And if it's positive you can call him up ask to meet or say it over the phone. If your nervous saying it over the phone may help you out, if your ok to talk to his face just set up a weekend lunch or simple coffee.
You could even, I know you said you weren't saying anything until you know for sure. But you could, meet up with him and tell him there's a chance you could be, and wanted him to know before you got the test done. This way it won't be sprung on him, and you took the major leap in trusting he'd listen to you. Again you don't have too of course, it's just an idea.
Things do happen, even if your on the pill, so make it known to him if he gets upset that you didn't trick him or set him up, just let it be known that you really were on the pill and hadn't planned it. If he understands that then I think you're good to go. First step is always the hardest, sorry if nothing help.
Good Luck to you!

Answer 4

First off you could being going through all these emotions for nothing because you have not confirmed that you are pregnant and if you then just call him up, meet him somewhere's and tell him. He will most likely not believe that it is his baby because after all it was a ONE night stand. Don't be surprized if he says this and tells you to do a paternity test when you give birth. I mean if i were a man and i had slept with you on the first night then it would be hard for me to believe that it was mine either. I am not trying to be mean to you but turn it around and you would most likely feel the same.
Good luck

Answer 5

If you have been on bc for 5 yrs, I don't even know why you would worry yourself, you can talk yourself right into a false pregnancy. Anyway, if your are, and only IFyou are, do it in person, probably in the privacy of one of your homes. Don't beat around the bush, tell him that the reason you wanted to meet with him is because you are pregnant. Then you will feel the situation and go from there. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 6

Don't be cutey, or dumb. Be a mature woman and lay it on the line by stating the facts. Personally, I don't think a one night stand guy would make a good dad. Maybe he would be having lots of other one night stands. You are playing with fire. Put on your thinking cap and get some sense this moment. There are many great men out there. Find one and get married if you want to be a mother. Raise your child in a safe secure home. One night stand guys are not worthy of being responsible, faithful and loyal to a wife and child. You can do better. Start taking these things seriously. This not a way to be trying to bring a child into the world. Remember the old saying,"First comes love, then comes marriage, then you come pushing a baby carriage. When you get these things out of order things don't work so well. Find you a good guy who loves you and wants to marry you and care for you and your baby. Best wishes!!

Answer 7

I am not trying to be cruel or rude, but you are NOT ready to have a baby. You don't have a loving relationship, much less a marriage. If you are pregnant, it is completely unplanned.
It seems to me that if you ARE pregnant, you should look into adoption. There are soooo many couple who would love and take care of your baby.
You should have a plan before you break it to the father, though. Knowing what you are going to do and explaining it to him calmly should help him with the shock.
Good luck to you.

Answer 8

hon i fell pregnant the same way luckely the guy wanted a relationship before we found out i was pregnant.. but we so wernt right for eachother & stayed together for our sons sake, now we dont speak hes an asshole if you read my question youd know my story. find out for sure if your pregnant first then deal with the next step dont stree too much yet, if you happen to be pregnant just be hinest its not like you had planned it these things happen. tell him he can be as involved as he wants & how you feel about the situation & ask how he feels too. if he doesnt want a part then dont worry about him ask yourself if you can do this on your own & go from there make sure you have people who will support you through it all cao it helpls.. good luck.

Answer 9

having a baby is the most incredible, happy, exciting event you could ever have. Take it from someone who was completely devastated when I found out i was pregnant. God gives you the ability to conquer any challenges. Especially the most rewarding challenge of raising the most adorable baby alive. Just come out and tell him because if he's on board that will be wonderful. But if he isnt, you can do it without him.

Answer 10

Don't listen to these idiots on here that think they're perfect. I know that you must be scared out of your mind, but you have to find out if you ARE in fact, pregnant and then you have to tell the guy if that's the case. If you have to tell him, make sure it is in person and in a calm setting. You never know how he may react. Sorry that you had to deal with so many retards on here. I hope they get what's coming to them.