Okay, here goes: we met during her and her boyfriend's off period, but I only got to know her a little while before they decided to "give it one last try". We're good friends and talk every day, and I know he's not going to do much for her for V-Day. I want to get her and her sister a spa package, just to be nice (sister's too young for me, and I don't want her to have to go alone).
Plus, it helps make the crappy boyfriend look bad. ;-)
Tell me what you think, ladies. Good idea, or bad idea?
I normally don't mess with "taken" ladies, and I have no problems getting dates, but she is definitely worth having some patience.
2007-02-06 08:37:34 · 11 answers · asked by Armand Sebastian 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Valentine's Day
Be warned that there is a SERIOUS chance of this backfiring, and the chances can actually get WORSE as the relationship weakens. If she sees this as the obvious ploy it is to worm your way into her affections, she may resent your attempt to come between her and her current boyfriend. And if she's the kind of person who can't just give up on a relationship (which is how it sounds), she may actually get angry at this intrusion because it will look like you're advocating ditching him for you rather than trying to actually work on the current relationship.
If it works, it will be the kind of memorably sweet story you tell to your kids later. But if it doesn't work, it could be disastrous. As long as you're ready for either possibility.
2007-02-06 09:42:16 · answer #1 · answered by Katie S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since the woman isn't married or engaged, I say do it, but cautiously.
Your letter reminds me of a minor YA book I read decades ago: The Losing Game by Anne Emery. The main character, Sue, has a questionable boyfriend who forgets her on Valentine's Day. She receives an anonymous card which says, "You don't even know you have my heart." Through her best girl friend, she realizes that Hank, a boy she is curious about, sent her the card. By the May student elections, Sue and Hank are coming together.
In this case, I don't recommend secrecy. Send "your girl" a friendly, maybe quasi-romantic card along with the present for "you and your sister" for the spa package. Send the sister a smaller, non-romantic card. Do NOT show up at the same spa on the same day! This way, even if you don't end up with the girl, she'll know that you are thinking of her and that you are thoughtful and even somewhat family-oriented (including the sister).
Have a nice V-Day, and send cards to your family members, too!
2007-02-06 17:51:09 · answer #2 · answered by MNL_1221 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say wait until after Valentines Day to make your move, but if you're good enough friends to get her a present like that, go on and do it.
Remember that this is their last go- around, their last shot, and sometimes love is better the second time around. She deserves to be happy, so make her options clear (yes, you are an option), but don't act on anything, let her. It doesn't sound like you quite love her, yet, and no sense in taking her from a happy home or putting pressure.
If you know in your heart of hearts that she is your someone special, and worth waiting for, mention this, minus the pressure (Ex; No rush, think it over, I'm willing to wait for you).
2007-02-06 16:52:12 · answer #3 · answered by Sara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! I didn't know guys like you existed! lol. It sounds like you have everything planned out, and it's a really good idea. Personal enough for her to know you're interested without being TOO personal and making her overly aware of your interest, which might lead her to feel and act weird toward you. And including the family members is always a nice touch! Hope it goes well. Good luck!
2007-02-06 17:01:41 · answer #4 · answered by Vampy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a good way to get her to think of you while she's with the crappy boyfriend, and getting her sister the package is a nice touch so the boyfriend can't get too mad since it is for both of them.
2007-02-06 16:47:50 · answer #5 · answered by jojonjesse 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's a cute idea. good that you're buying the sister one too. but still be respectuful that she has a bf even though he's not a good one in your eyes. just keep your guard up enough so you won't get hurt if she decides to stay with him.
2007-02-06 16:48:52 · answer #6 · answered by peejay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awwwww, thats sweet! She'll love it and that will definitly drop a hint that you like her! MAybe she'll even realize what she could have over what she has! Good luck!
2007-02-06 16:45:53 · answer #7 · answered by Amanda S 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
wait until they break up, and then give it to her, tell her you wanted to give it to her for Valentines Day but, you didn't want to cause her any stress,...
if they don't break up you didn't waste your time or money and if they do then you are off to a good start
2007-02-06 16:52:25 · answer #8 · answered by C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good idea as long as you're doing it because you want to and you do not expect anything back from her...
2007-02-06 16:45:56 · answer #9 · answered by Love always, Kortnei 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
omg, that is soo good, to even send her sister looooooool, damn, that does make her current bf look bad.
2007-02-06 17:21:19 · answer #10 · answered by Pook 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋