My finace and I just found out that a woman he was with a month before we started dating has filed for child support from him on his 11 week old. He didn't even know she was pregnant with his child. She called him in September and said she was7 months along and then said that "no" it wasn't his. We've done the paternity test and yes it's his. My finace and I just bought a house in Janurary 07 and I am a stay at home mom (I also do inhome daycare). My questions is....Can he get full custody?? She works 50-60 hours a week, lives in a dinky apartment, is always writing bad checks and just recently got arrested for obstructing an officer. My fiance works 45 hours a week and we thought that the baby would have a better life with us not having to go to different sitters etc and being in a loving enviorment. The mother always calls the baby the "damn kid"......need some suggestions please!!!!
2007-02-06 05:51:03 · 30 answers · asked by cutie girl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some of you don't understand!! This baby has all ready been through enough! The mom drank her whole pregnancy. She lives just down the road from my mom and we knew she was pregnant, so we hired an attorney when she told us in September. I am willing to take on this child and welcome her into my home. I am a very loving parent to 2 children ages 10 and 8 so I know how important it is to have a loving and safe enviroment for children! I would NEVER call my children "damn kid". If she's already calling the baby this, it's just going to get worse! C'mon people....today's society is growing very weak. Everyday I read about a child getting hurt or killed because the judge allowed the child to live with the wrong parent....I'm NOT letting that happen to an innocent baby! Plus my fiance WANTS custody! By the way we got engaged in November and are getting married in the fall....for those who wants to know! Thanks!
2007-02-06 06:40:28 · update #1
Wow! Your are a great person and you must really love him I was expecting this question to go in the opposite direction when I first started reading it. Just to be pleasantly surprised. Congratulations to you for being such a stand up woman. I think it could be possible. This woman sounds like she may not even want this baby, she may even sign over her rights to you. I would definately give it a shot. Good luck!
2007-02-06 06:03:34 · answer #1 · answered by Destiny 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to be very careful with this. Your fiance just found out he has a child and now you want to get full custody. You need to prove the mother unfit first. That is not such an easy thing to do. You will need proof and not just hear-say. Another thing you should consider is that you are trying to take that woman's baby from her. I really don't think you have thought this through. She will always be attached to your fiance because of their child they share. I hope you understand the full consequences here because you are asking for a war and she could very well be up for the challenge. Perhaps you should talk to your fiance about this and see if he truely wants to go through this long process. Thank you and good luck.
2007-02-06 06:19:47 · answer #2 · answered by cookie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would file for custody immediately. You two seem like the better choice and a court could appoint a guardian at Litam to observe both houses for where the best interest of the child would be served. I hope you do get custody. If she calls the baby the Damn kid now, what will happen when the kid starts to talk and defend their selves against her words. Physical abuse is just around the corner and you can stop that from happening, I would file yesterday and I think you can win. Start keeping a log of things you see wrong and dates, times and go ahead and tape your phone calls and if she leaves messages on the phone that incriminate her abilities as a parent keep those too. You have to have proof to win, but she seems so willing to provide that to you free of charge. LOL Best of luck
Tracylyn Sharrit
2007-02-06 05:59:19 · answer #3 · answered by Tracylyn S 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Does your fiance want custody of the child? If he lvoes the child then he should file for custody of the child and not worry about what his ex can or cannot do but one thing is certain. He will need an attorney to help him file for custody of the child and given the situation that you describe more than likely your fiance will get custody. He just has to understand and accept the circumstances of the custody and the responsibility that goes along in raising the child.
2007-02-06 05:58:48 · answer #4 · answered by Lewis P 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Usually it's hard for a father to get custody but the arrest would certainly be in his favor. Before things get completely out of control though - why not just ask for the baby? If she's calling it "damn kid" she may not even want it. She might just sign it over to him if he asked. If she says no, then hire a family lawyer.
Kudos to you for being willing to raise this child in a loving manner.
2007-02-06 05:59:42 · answer #5 · answered by Queen of Cards 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say get a lawyer and go for it....If she is the way you have described and you can document it and get proof you guys have a very good chance of getting custody....I would also ask the lawyer what they think of hiring a PI to check on her also...you may be amazed at what else this poor innocent child is going though....good luck and congratulations
2007-02-06 07:30:01 · answer #6 · answered by Dawn D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you can sue for custody, it looks like you will have a better environment to raise this child, hat's of to you that you are willing to take this on, I think it's very big of you and you must love your fiance very much. Talk to a family lawyer as soon as you can so you can get the ball rolling, You will definitely get joined custody, and it looks like his ex is not prepared to be a full time mom.
2007-02-06 05:58:52 · answer #7 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would definitely contact an attorney if you both want full custody..chances are that the mother will retain partial however. My best piece of advice is to document everything that happens with regards to the mother and child....this way, you have proof that she is unfit and the baby would have a more healthy environment in your house...I wish you the best of luck!! That baby deserves the best life you can give it!!
2007-02-06 05:59:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wow! She's already calling the baby "the damn kid" at 11 weeks old? It sounds like the only reason she had the baby was so she could file for child support! I would definitely fight for custody because she sounds like bad news...
2007-02-06 06:00:19 · answer #9 · answered by Soccer Mom 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he can prove that she is an unfit mother and everything you said is true he does have a chance. contact a lawyer, and even family services to check where she lives. if they feel that she is putting that child in any harms way. they will remove that child, and I think your fiance will have a better chance on getting custody of his daughter. they will check his background and where you live too. but everything will be fine. good luck. I hope he gets custody of his child. and he has a good fiance that is sticking by his decision. good luck again.
2007-02-06 06:00:24 · answer #10 · answered by misty blue 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋