i need to ask a question about marriage girls!!!!?

Question

me and my boyfriend are getting married here pretty soon and i am kinda nervous because his mom wants us to get married in North Richland Hills where she lives because she wants us to have a regular wedding and she is going to pay for it but my dad wanted us to get married in front of the justice of the peace so that it wouldnt cost so much. but isnt the brides family supposed to pay for the wedding??? but my parents cant they just bought a house and land and its going to cost them 750 dollars a month to pay for the house and the land so they cant pay for the wedding so is getting married and his mom paying for it right?????

Answer 1

Are you a virgin and going to wear white? If not, I wouldn't worry to much about tradition. It's okay for the grooms' parents to pay for the wedding in this day and age. It's custom for the brides' family to pay for the wedding, but not required. If your soon to be mother-in-law wants to pay for your wedding, then by all means allow her to do so. There is nothing wrong with them paying for your wedding. After all, you are marrying their son. There are going to be so many other concerns on your wedding day, allow the mother of the groom to worry about the wedding expenses. Thank you and good luck.

Answer 2

What do you want...that should be all that matters. If you want a wedding in North Richland Hills and his mom is willing to pay or help pay for it then, do it. If you want a wedding somewhere else then, save some money and have the a nice affordable wedding. If you want to go to the judge then go. You just have to make it happen whatever you want.

Answer 3

I have been there and done that and let me tell you, you will be VERY upset down the road if you don't do what you want to do now. Meaning, you have to decide what you want for your wedding and by you I am including your fiance. If your future mother-in-law wants to pay for the wedding and you want a more formal wedding, then by all means do it. People say all the time they will get married quick now and have a big wedding later, that usually does not happen. This is you and your fiance's day so don't let anyone ruin it. Anyway, women are liberated and times have changed so it is perfectly acceptable for the groom's family to pay. Good Luck!!

Answer 4

If she wants to pay for it, just understand that she'll probably expect to have complete control over every detail.

I was married 17 years ago before the Justice of the Peace. I never missed the whole fancy wedding thing, nor the ridiculous expense of it. You can still make your wedding special YOUR way on a limited budget. It's the celebration of the event that's important.

Best wishes.

Answer 5

Lots of questions for you...how soon is "pretty soon" and is it imperative that you get married "pretty soon"?

Your future MIL lives in N Richland Hills; where do your parents live?

How old are you and your BF? Are both or either of you working full time? Are you professionals or students or what?

Have you and your BF discussed what the two of you want in terms of a wedding - size, location, budget? honeymoon?

While the bride's family TRADITIONALLY pays for the largest part of the wedding (the groom's family picks up the tab for groomsmen, the wedding flowers - bouquets, arrangements, boutonnieres, etc - rehearsal dinner and other misc. items), weddings can be paid for by anyone who wishes to contribute. Often, the bride and groom pay for the wedding themselves (this avoids conflicts with parents who don't approve of or agree with the couple's choices of expenditures, including disagreements over which wedding gown to buy and where to hold the wedding/reception).

N Richland Hills has an exquisite country club for weddings/receptions - if your future MIL is a member, perhaps she is considering that as a venue.

Is there a church you would like to be married in - church members ususally pay only nominal rates for use of the facilities, so check with your church, or your parents church, or future in-laws church.

Or do something whacky, and see about getting married at Six Flags...on a roller coaster, maybe?

Don't pressure your folks into paying for anything they aren't comfortable with - by the same token, letting your future MIL pay for a lavish wedding could cause problems down the road (the holder of the purse strings generally holds the money bag over your head to get you to do things their way or no way).

Best advice I can give you, based on what you've said, is to wait a bit before doing the wedding thing, you and your BF save up some money to pay for the event yourselves (maybe ask your respective parents to commit to contributing equal, and modest, amounts, with a reasonable time frame, such as a one year enagement). Do a lot of "shopping around" for wedding stuff that you can create yourself (floral arrangements, for example) and look for lower cost alternatives to fancy wedding attire, esp. for groomsmen and bridesmaids. Don't feel you have to include every friend you've had since elementary school in the wedding party. Do think about having an "at home" wedding at your parents' new house...they might see a value in and feel better spending money on landscaping for your outdoor wedding and reception at their house as opposed to spending money on renting a hall.

Hope this helps!

Answer 6

Well traditionally the brides parents pay for the wedding, but there is no law that says that it has to be that way. There is nothing wrong with it if everyone is ok with the grooms parents paying for it. The bottom line is that it is your wedding and it only happens once so do it like you want. There are plenty of unique ideas that you can do yourself that save $.

Answer 7

I really don't think that there is a right or a wrong to this no one goes by the book any more just let his mom pay for it ask your dad to give you something else... or if you don't want to ask his mom for some thing else and get married by the justice man!!!

what i did was went to the justice of peace and got married then we threw one hell of a party that weekend with all our family so yeah let your dad pay the 50 dollars for person to tell you that you are man and wife then let his mom give you the party of a life time!!!! it works!! Good Luck!!

Answer 8

I think you're in a perfect situation. Your parents can't afford to pay for the wedding that they 'traditionally' should, and your future mother-in-law is willing to foot the bill for a nicer wedding than you could afford. If she's offering, I'd say take her up on it. Your parents should be fine with it, but in the unlikely event that they're not, just say that she's offering, and you don't want to be a financial burden to them. If they want to make a contribution they could maybe pay for your dress, and then you can reach a happy medium. Good luck with the wedding! Besides, by humouring the mother-in-law, you're not provoking the 'mother-in-law/wife feud' that seems so common! Happy wedding, and I think you've lucked out!

Answer 9

It is traditional that the bride's parents pay for the wedding. Back in the day, they married a girl for their dowry. It's freakin' 2007 here. If your soon to be mother-in-law wants to pay for the wedding just let her. It'll make her happy and less stress on your pockt. My husband and I paid for our wedding. His mom wanted to help out. I told her it was okay, but she insisted. She bought the cake and got the napkins done with our names and the day we got married, the cake topper, and the union candle. Trust me, let her do whatever she wants, it'll only make your relationship with her better. Her happiness means your future happiness. Another question you wanna ask yourself is "what do I wanna do?" What is going to make you happy in the long run? Also, discuss this with your fiancee. What does he think is best? See if you guys can pay for some and your mother in law pay for some, etc. Compromise is good. It's your wedding after all.

Answer 10

You, your boyfriend, and both sets of parents should get together to have a talk about this. It is you and your boyfriend's wedding first and foremost, so it is up to you to decide what kind of wedding you want and if you want to let his parents pay for it. The bride's family paying for the wedding is a tradition, not a law, and does not need to be adhered to. Do what is right for you, and have everyone discuss and arrive at something they can all agree on.