I want support. What should I do? I want to be with my baby.?

Question

When I was pregnate my bf and 2 kids all lived together. Then we got an eviction notice and lived with his mother. She was awfull to me. She wouldn't let me wash clothes. She kept calling me homeless. She kept telling me and my kids to get out of her house. Of course not her kid. I had no place to go. I went to ask for help from Cps and they got me a hotel till I found an apartment. I found a 1 bedroom and moved in. My bf still lives with his mom. He does not help me at all. I am a mother of 3 but he says the other 2 are not his and he dosnt think he should do anything to help with them. This hurts bad when he says this to me. I want him to be here for me. I just had his baby!I can come up with 500 a month plus food I would just need 300 plus some for bills. Do you think he should help me out? I want to be with my baby to bond with her. I think no one can take care of her like I can. It hurts bad when he takes her to his moms house. I wish he would of backed me up and stayed by my side

dang based on the answers already I should add some more details. I have a job and will be going back on friday. I have childcare. I love the guy or it would be a lot easier if I wasnt with him. I'm sure I could find someone that could treat me a whole lot better. I dont get child support for my other 2 kids. I dont really need it. I'm not strapped for cash. I was just hurting before because i was 9 month pregnate and when I was living in that ladys house I just had the baby. I was in pain from just having a baby. She was mentaly abusive and made me feel like trash. She was awfull to my kids including her grand daughter. Last time we were there she made my daughter cry. I want him to back me up and stay away from her or at least yell at her and tell her to stop being so mean. I pretty much dont need him for anything. I just love him and want to be together as a family. I don't know how to get this threw his head. Like I said before I want him by my side

Answer 1

we can wish all we want but he is who he is, and u have to face it. u need to seek support for the kids, u are in love with the wrong man, a mama's boy basically who doesn't want any kind of responsibility. u need to ask for support for all the kids from their dad. don't let him take the baby anymore. he did not stay by your side too much work and responsibility.

Answer 2

I believe that you should take all 3 of your children and leave him behind. If you stay with him you are going to jeopardize the mental health of the two that are not his. I'm serious, I went through a similar situation, and the child that wasn't his is now 27, and it still bothers him that he wasn't treated equally. Your boyfriend doesn't sound responsible, and his family certainly sounds way off kilter. There is help out there, go back to CPS, and they will help you with bills and childcare. Your children's mental and physical well being should never be jeopardized because of any man. You CAN make it on your own...I had 5 kids and if I can do it you can. No, it won't always be easy, but in the long run, you build up your self-esteem, and show your children that you are a strong, dependable person. Try going to college, even if it is part time. They have grants to pay for it. This will help you gain self-esteem, and better employment in the future. Once you gain your self-esteem back...you will feel good about yourself, and you won't allow anyone to take that away. Sooner or later you will find a decent man who will love and respect you and your children, the way that you deserve. Your boyfriend now can have normal visiting rights through the courts. Best of wishes...

Answer 3

Well he hasnt,,now you have to go to the courts & demand child support for his child.He legally has no right to see this child until he helps support the baby.He did not help you when you needed to leave so,,thats his tuff luck as he feels you should be carrying this heavy load by yourself.BS.Get a backbone & get what is entitled to your baby.Maybe in the future when he matures more & gets his life toether with a job & house etc. ,,then maybe you two can get back together but for now,,its not happenening so do what you must for your childs security.Do not ever leave the baby with him & then leave or he can say that you abandoned the child & he could get custody.Never leave the baby with him until this is straightened out through the courts.Good luck.
Yes,,You should also be getting money everymonth from each child's father so skip to it girl,,you have alot to do & will be great in the end.Make appointment at Social Services for dna testing on each child.If you need to find someone,,try Zabasearch.com,,its free.

Answer 4

He's a loser, but so are you. 1) Go to Planned Parenthood, and get some birth control - it's free to low-income people. If you can't support your kids - why keep having more? I know, it sounds obvious, but it wasn't at all obvious to you. 2) Go to the courts and file for child support. Ask a friend to help you if you can't figure out how to do it alone. Look online for the ways to file in your state. Call a lawyer. 3) Your b/f will not be with you, and will not support you on his own accord. He will do what is convenient for him, he doesn't give a damn about you or the kids. Get it through your head, and act accordingly. You're on your own. Stop calling him your b/f, and move on. If you go on looking for a new man, please don't forget the 1).

Answer 5

Well, I wanted to be home with my kids too, but like most people I had to work!! Sounds like you need to do the same! You've made poor choices in your life and now you and your children have to pay the consequences! Quit having kids you can't afford to support!!!! Use the law to collect support from him on however many of the kids that belong to him and find the fathers of the others if you can and make them pay also. Then try making wiser choices for you and your children, so you don't have to continue suffering!

Answer 6

I feel your pain. You can be with your baby if you threatened to take him to court. The courts will help you in this matter. I know so many of us don't always want things to turn into legal matters. But remember people only abide by the law. I know you miss your daughter but by the sounds of it his mom is trying to take over. Please don't allow this to happen. I like the fact that he is taking care of his daughter but is he really. It seems to me that his mother is. And of course he has to help you out whether those are his kids are not. He shouldn't do that, But you know what legally he can. Those aren't his kids and the father of those children need to step in. Haven't you heard of child support. I know it's hard out here but he is not your husband and now all of a sudden he wants to just deal with his baby. Big Jerk. By the way it was nice of the police officers to put you in a hotel. I don't know what city you live but our officers could care less. Best of Luck with your situation.

Answer 7

take him to court for child support. If you are getting any type of financial aid from the state, he should be listed as the father and they can go after him for money. Obviously he must not care about the welfare of the baby so don't give it a second thought about what he or his mother think about you. Go for support for the child and get support from the other 2 kids father as well. And work yourself! Don't rely on welfare, better yourself and set an example for your children.

Answer 8

You need to call Maury. Girl, he has done you wrong.
And you need to contact Child Support Enforcement Agency in your town and make him take the financial responsibility you are entitled to.
He owes you this. You didnt make these babies by yourself and if their his, then he needs to step up and be a man. I am serious about contacting Maury. He will get the paternity tests done and you can start collecting what is rightfully yours.
You are taking away from your kids if you let him by without paying for them. They shouldnt have to do without, just because he wants to be an @$$.
Take a stand today and get this ball rolling. He will have to pay according to his income. If he has no income, he will still have to pay a little. Dont let him tell you he wont. HE WILL!!!!!

Answer 9

Too bad you learned about men and relationships this late in the game.
I really don't think you realize that you are alone and this man will probably not lift a finger to help you. You are in denial because there is not very many obtions left to you.
Why would a man who has his advantages want to put himself in lifes wringer? over you? get real! you are asking the next to impossible. Well you made your life what it is and you are the author of your own drama.
Better and smarter people then you have gone down the path of least resistance. Get professional mental health and grow up.
Their is no prince in shinning armor going to rescue you.
grow up and try to raise your kids before you bring any more momas boys into your kids life..you are drawn to a moma's boy and its your addiction. are you addicted to any other substance?
be honest because you could not be this screwed up unless you had something that has left you impaired..repeat...get some professional help..clean up your act..you could meet a real nice bunch of people in re=hab..I been there and done that and now i am happily married,,retired and my kids are grown with kids and they are finally out on their own...ahh serenity NOW..how sweet it is but i had to take the bull by the horns and come clean ..do it

Answer 10

Isn't a lot of this something you should have thought about before you started having kids? I hate to be judgemental, but you're clearly in no position to be a good parent and give your kids the things they need. I'm willing to bet you cannot afford health care.

Please stop at 3.