Do you think a man and a woman can just be friends?

Question

Also, do you think it is inappropriate for a married man and woman to be friends? Does that answer change if one is not married? What if one has feelings for the other, but understands that they cannot (for whatever reason) act on those feelings.

And no I am not asking the last question because I am thinking about hooking up with a married guy, its just a simple question that my friends and I have been debating for some time, and would like others views.

Answer 1

Ive been married now for almost 12 years and I have a female friend and that is all we are is friends. Yes she is single. Since having children our going out has slowed dramatically down but, we still manage to talk on the phone and go out a few times a year to get some coffee and perhaps catch a concert. While my wife and I were dating I began a friendship with her. We worked out together, we DJ'd at our college radio station we had a lot in common. She was like a perfect friend. Did I or her ever have sexual feelings for one another? If she did for me I never knew it. Did I for her? The thought may have crossed my mind way back but, I dont recall. And if it did it never was an issue. So is it inappropriate I say no. And no it does not change for a married man as well. If you find a friend of the opposite sex and you have feelings for them. You werent looking for a friend you were looking for something else. Peace out...............

Answer 2

Short answer, no.
Long answer, yes but only for a while.
A male/female friendship is only possible while both are single and ONLY if there is absolutely no sexual chemistry. When the woman becomes attached she will normally gravitate towards the friends of her boyfriend and (with the exception of her best girlfriend) leave all other friends behind. The exception to this would be if her boyfriend and friend had a LOT in common but the female in her would start to resent the intrusion anyway.
If the man becomes attached, it's all over-red-rover, even if the woman is attahed also. The new girlfriend is not going to compete with any women in her new mans life and it makes no difference whether or not they were ever sexual.
As for married man/single female...no way, nu huh, not ever! If a new girlfriend would not compete then there is no way a married woman will stand for it, especially if she has had children and feels inadequate when she (inevitably) compares herself to the female friend. If a single woman tries to maintain a friendship with a married man the wife will feel threatened, no two ways about it.
I know because I have lived all of the scenarios you've outlined. I am a female and lost a treasured male friend (of more than 10 years) because of the insecurities of a girl-friend who had all the maturity of a jealous puppy.

See ya.

Answer 3

Yes, they can and gender is not a disease so should not be treated as such. I think that concept suggests conflict.

"Also, do you think it is inappropriate for a married man and woman to be friends?"

Yes, I think it is appropriate. When marriage takes place a man and woman become as one therefore, the correct moral choice is a couple no longer has the choice to call anything outside marriage a date or acknowledge attraction feelings towards anyone except his/her spouse and willfully accepts this. People outside the marriage are brothers and sisters and should be treated as such with no gender discrimination involved. By this age we should be way beyond the cootie stage...why go back there. I remember that faze back in grade school being all out war at that immature age and we were very immature. Spiritually mature people can love one another as friends and and at the same time preserve marriage for a higher level of love and friendship.

Answer 4

Absolutely
My 'bestest buddy' was a guy whom i met when he started dating my friend. i've to admit that at the very beginning i envied her cause he was a fantastic guy on all the levels but my friendship with her was way more important for me. We (him and me) had so much in common, we were meeting and chatting very often, sometimes the three of us, sometimes just him and me. He taught me a lot about the way guys think and i believe i taught him quite a bit about the girls point of view. We were always totally honest and open with each other- real soul mates- a concept lost for some... About a year- year and a half into our friendship, they broke up but i still remained friends with both of them (although we had to meet seperately coz there too many fights between them). i have to admit that it wasnt easy being stuck between the two of them but i always made it clear that i can listen to them but will never take any side.
Few years later, unfortunately, our life paths drove us into completely different directions (including moving the country) and slowly we lost contact with each other. Still miss him very much- AS A FRIEND.

Answer 5

Hey look at me. All i have ever had is Freinds. never a lover, never a wife.
its not appropriate for a man to have a freind who is female, but it is appropriate for a husband NOT to be alone with another woman other than his wife. Also that must be according to the will of his wife. A mans body is not HIS own, it is owned by his wife and vice versa but All mankind is bought by the blood of christ. Therefore none of us truly own ourselves.

Answer 6

u could be but you still need 2 keep the intimate side

Answer 7

its fine to have a opposite sex friend but its tough to maintain,...unless you have no desire for sex with the opposite sex.....the married thing only applies if your mate is against it and I have found that they ALWAYS are

Answer 8

no its not inapropriate you can just be friends