does it mean something is missing from their lifes?why do they enjoy watching total stangers,usually slutty,people have worthless sex?does it mean they dont think their wives are good enough or what?
2007-02-05 19:16:43 · 45 answers · asked by Brittany L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Men don't always link sex with emotions. They sometimes need quick uncomplicated release - to relax, de-stress - whatever. Looking at total strangers is the easiest way to do that. It has absolutely no bearing on your relationship and you shouldn't worry in the slightest.
Have confidence in your relationship - a few porn mags arn't doing you any harm - but if your worried talk to him - communication is a lot more important than page three girls.
2007-02-05 19:22:12 · answer #1 · answered by Madam Rosmerta 5 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Hello,
I am a married man of 42 years service to my beloved wife, which makes me a 'child of the 1960s' and yes I look at porn, I always have, my wife knows, and we look at it as a form of titilation, which in turn will add to our libido's, I have no objection should she choose to look at it too, we are not a couple of sheep, we still have genuine loving feelings for each other, and I firmly believe that is every reason we have been sharing our bodies together for every one of our loving years, and 11 beautiful children are a produce of that marriage, all grown up, and have relationships with their own wives and husbands, and 7 grandchildren for us all to cherish too, and yes even spoil sometimes, but we are a very happy family living all over the world, living productive lives in their various employments, so a resounding yes to your query, and I will close with an honest remark that tells you, there is nothing missing from my marriage. I tell my wife every day in the morning I Love You, and especially at nite before we sleep, Never had the need to stray, if I want to look at someone else, the internet won't hurt our loving relationship. Yes Go ahead and look at it, it is harmless enough if you don't take it to excess, enjoy your life and miss nothing at all.
Tony M
2007-02-05 21:32:14 · answer #2 · answered by tony m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't only married men but women as well.
My wife finds porn exciting with the more variation the better. I just find it boring. In most cases it is a harmless indulgence in fantasy without any wish to be a participant or experience what they see in real life.
Watching porn is not a reflection of something missing in their relationship but is a non-threatening form of voyeurism. It's a bit like watching Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous or documentaries about murderers. Indulging fantasies and looking in on things we will never experience is normal.
The only reason he shouldn't watch porn is if it disturbs you. If this is the case and he realizes but does not care it is definitely a bad sign.
2007-02-05 19:27:18 · answer #3 · answered by John B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Better that they look at it, than indulge in it elsewhere. Besides, that sort of sex has nothing to do with the kind of physical relationship they have with their wives. It is merely visual stimuli. It's not just men who watch porn, women do too. It's not to everyone's taste. Some people prefer to leave most things to the imagination, but stimuli of some kind or another are often helpful in getting people in the mood for love when they've worked themselves to a pulp all week, or have general everyday worries getting in the way.
2007-02-05 19:25:45 · answer #4 · answered by Shona L 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No it's not that, but its more of an ego thing - it's good to know that someone other than their wives find them attractive, that someone other than their wives want them (even though they don't as they're just whores but that's their mentality).
It can also be an addiction so you need to watch out for that so you can confront that issue and help them if needs be.
If it's the ego thing, make sure he knows how much you want him, make sure he knows how incredible he is and how hot you find him! It helps your relationship wonders, make sure you also tell him how much you appreciate him and how proud he makes you. I love complimenting my boyfriend - it makes me glow when I see him happy!
Do talk to him about it and let him know where you stand on this issue as it can tear marriages apart, with you sulking and feeling rejected and him not understanding what he could've done wrong so just ignoring your tears. Also spice things up in the bedroom, however cliche that is (!), new lingerie, try new positions - get a Kama Sutra book. Make it fun and erotic!
Good luck and please know that he loves you more than anything, it's just either an ego thing that he occasionally needs or an addiction.
2007-02-05 22:18:45 · answer #5 · answered by Mrs Stevo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think it is a problem.At least he isnt out there HAVING worthless sex with those "so called SLUTTY people".( I just wish he would clean up his tissues after)
Honestly I wouldnt deprive him of his porn (keeps him off my back!! lol)
I also dont feel that it meens Im not good enough I proberbly wont do what those women do but we have a loving relationship so I guess thats the difference.
Chill out.
2007-02-05 19:49:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It completely depends on the couple. In a solid marraige, looking at porn wouldn't bother either person, unless one is the holy-rolling hell and damnation type.
When it gets dangerous is if the husband is hiding it or it gets to where instead of paying attention to his wife in the evenings or whenever, he prefers the porn.
Viewing porn alone for long periods of time can start giving a person unrealistic ideas about sex, especially for a younger person who has not experienced the type of wonderful sex that comes from a long term relationship.
2007-02-05 22:14:46 · answer #7 · answered by marti 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it depends on the couple. If its something that bothers the wife then probably not. Just because a man or woman watches porn doesn't mean anything is missing. Compare it to a love story. Do married women watch love stories because they think they are missing the romance in their relationship?
Just a thought.
2007-02-05 19:23:15 · answer #8 · answered by Tyler 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lots of men (and women) look at erotica; it does not mean that "something is missing."
People just enjoy additional forms of arousal. It's unfortunate that some partners feel "threatened" by this.
There are actually men who act "threatened" by their partner using sex toys, as though all the pleasure the woman experiences has to come from the man.
Married men and women also masturbate, because they enjoy giving themselves pleasure as much as they enjoy having sex with their partner. This is not strange in any way, and should not be "threatening" to the self-image of the other person.
We've been married for many years, and we both look at erotic images - together and separately. There's really nothing wrong with it AS LONG AS both partners are getting their fair share of sexual pleasure from one another.
2007-02-05 23:37:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure married men should look at porn. It could benefit the wife if he does look at porn and learn from it. It could be a turn on and then he looks to his wife for sex and it may be hot and steamy. I know after a while of being married sex can get boring, this may be a way to spice it up and keep int fresh. Just a thought.
2007-02-05 19:22:23 · answer #10 · answered by lbtech04 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I suppose it's only natural although possibly not necessary. If they are happy in the relationship and with the sexual side then there should be no need for them to be looking at that sort of thing. But then it's always going to happen with most men at some point. Human nature I suppose.
2007-02-05 19:39:41 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋