should i have left a tip?

Question

tonight i went to a diner. i got some coffee, and about 30 minutes later i wanted some toast. so, i told my waitress and she asked, "white or wheat?" so i replied,"wheat's fine" and she walked off. 20 minutes later, i still don't have toast. then she walks by and says, "your toast is comin' sweetie." i hear her yell at the cook, "that toast done yet?" and the cook says, "what?"

so, i waited another 7 minutes for toast. and it doesn't stop there.

she brought the toast, and it was white bread! and she asked if i wanted a different kind of jam, and told me all of my choices. i wanted strawberry, then she says "oh, nevermind, we're out."

i gave her no tip. but, does this make me a bad person?

Answer 1

I tip for GOOD service. That wasn't good service.

Answer 2

Yes, but I do think that you got exceptionally bad service. In my experience waiting tables, when someone leaves without tipping, most servers just think that person is cheap. That's why if I get exceptionally bad service, I leave change on the table. Twice in my life I have left change in the shape of a frown face. This usually gets the point across.

And no, you're not a bad person. I mean how hard is to make toast? I could have made it myself and had it back to you in 5 minutes...and it would have been wheat toast. But don't worry. The waitress could not have expected too much if you ordered coffee and toast.

Answer 3

you should always, always leave a tip.

The standard for american restaurants (and I'm assuming you are in america) is 15% for average service and move up from there (good service should get 20% and great service doesn't really need to be calculated, but should be generous.)

Very bad service - service which is surly, filled with mistakes, or exceptionally slow in a way that cannot be accounted for by the business of the restaurant - can be compensated with a slightly meager 10%-15% percent.

I am shocked at how many people have said that they only leave a tip if the service is "good" or "exceptional." The expectation that you will be leaving a tip should be included in your thoughts AS YOU ACCOUNT FOR THE COST OF THE MEAL. I am dead serious about this. These people make less than minimum wage legally because they are expected to recieve a certain percentage in tips. When you don't tip, you are literally taking money out of their pockets. Additionally, most table servers are also paying out the bus people and occasionally others out of what they pick up in tips. Was your table clean when you sat down? Because when you stiffed the waitress, you also stiffed the guy who cleaned it and cleared your dirty coffee cup when you were done.

I don't think this makes you a bad person, but it does make you an uninformed person, and I'm horrified that so many people are backing you up on your behavior. I have to say that I think some of what you got was based on the fact that you took up the table for the length of time you were there and only ordered coffee. When I am that person, I leave extra to account for the fact that I sat at a table for a certain amount of time. There's a reason why many restaurants (especially late night restaurants) institute minimum orders for table service. Your coffee and toast are quite frankly unprofitable to them (the establishment owners, not the waitstaff), and they'd rather turn the table over, if they are busy.

It's an unspoken rule of the business model though - that they will seat you and serve you coffee and toast, even if they wished you were ordering a 4-course meal with drinks, and your unspoken side of it is that you are expected to acknowledge that someone else prepared the food for you, served it to you and then cleaned up after you by leaving a percentage for service in addition to the cost of the food items.

You don't work there, so you really don't know what the exchange meant between the cook and the waitress. She could be wondering what the hell is taking him so long, and he could have said "what?" because he didn't hear her. A lot of service issues that get blamed on waitstaff are really the kitchen's fault - including the wheat/white toast thing (betcha the kitchen ran out, just like they ran out of strawberry.) Or you could be right, but you can't judge it, so you should have left a tip.

The very fact you are asking the question, though, sounds like underneath it all you recognize that a good person would have risen above and leave a tip, albeit a mediocre one for the level of service you recieved. It's easy to excercise control and pinch pennies for weak service, but the symbolic gesture just made you look cheaper than you already looked (by staying there for an hour and only getting coffee+toast.) I'm just really concerned about all the people who are saying they don't tip unless the service is really great. I don't even know what to say to that. If you go to a restaurant and order something that costs ten dollars your brain should be saying "so that's a $12.85 dish - $10 cost, $2 for the 20% tip and 85 cents for 8.5 percent sales tax. Okay, can I get that and still get the smoked mozzarella appetizer? or should I go for the salad, that's only about $6.50 - $5 cost of item plus $1 for 20% and 43 cents for the 8.5% sales tax?" It's just part of what you consider and if you want to save yourself the cost of a tip you should get takeout.

btw I've never waited tables - just have lots of friends who do - plus have read the right books (Nickel and Dimed and so forth)

Answer 4

I agree with all the above answers. She doesn't make much money and relies mainly on tips. If she kept your coffee full and only messed up the toast thing it probably would have been "good" of you to leave a tip. Bad service does not deserve "extra" compensation though. I probably would have left a little something for her time in general, but it would have been little. If you feel guilty about it then you should have probably left something. If not then no big deal. Avoid the place for a while though, you don't want to go back soon and get something you don't want on your toast the next time! =)

Answer 5

It sounds like she never told the kitchen about the toast order. I hated it when my waitresses did that to me. They'd occasionally take and order and forget to punch it in. Then they'd come back asking where the *whatever* was and I'd look at my tickets and say "There is no order for table 201 for *whatever*!!!" Then I'd have to scramble to get it done fast.

So yes, I'm blaming the waitress. I've been a waitress, and we do make mistakes, and after something like that, I wouldn't expect a tip, especially with her "nevermind" attitude. Half an hour for toast is insane.

You're not a bad person.

Answer 6

Cooking Tips Information
http://www.r6k.net/cooking-tips/

Answer 7

Hell no. You shoulda complained. I would've. She gives you the wrong toast after you waited for almost half an hour, she offers you jam then says nevermind when you choose one that she offered, and you think you're a bad person? Honey, you're too nice a person far as I'm concerned cuz I kno alotta people that would've went off.
Whether or not she was having a bad day is irrelavant. When you work, you put up front that makes you look happy and welcomin so you don't get fired. Thats the way things work. You don't let your emotions interfere with the job. Plus it was coffee and toast you didn't ask for, theres not much to tip for.

Answer 8

i was a waitress for a long time and i would say you were ok in not leaving a tip. tips are not required. they are to say thank you for exceptional service. while she did give you good service (i assume) in keeping your coffee refilled, i would have been upset about the toast thing too. maybe a smaller than normal tip would have been acceptable as well.

Answer 9

ok, coffee $1.00 side of toast $1.50 so if you did tip it would be what $.50 and you used up a chair that should have brought your waitress $1.50 an hour. Don't think it made a difference. You should always tip a minimum of $1 for any wait service. Maybe you waitress wasn't enthused cause she knew you were just drinking coffee and had other customers who were spending $25 per table = $4.50 to $5 tip

Answer 10

in response to some of the people saying he was taking up "one of her tables" WRONG answer. without customers SHE DOES NOT HAVE A JOB. He is and should be made welcome he was there to get a cup of coffee and later decided on some toast. If I got that kind of service and if some of these people replying gave me the attitude like I shouldnt be there because "i just ordered coffee" I'd say something to the manager; smile; and never go there again unless I heard from someone I trusted that the place was better run.

You people that told him he shouldnt have been there because he just ordered coffee; you people need to check yourselves. Your attitude does come across to people and BIG SURPRISE when they call you on it! NOT. no tip for those stinky attitudes none at all. Learn some respect for the customer.

that waitress had a flippant attitude; and was kind of an airhead... white or wheat want fries with that paper or plastic... drone. want strawberrry? oh sorry nvm, I forgot we were out of strawberry. No I'd feel the same way if someone gave me bad service. see the thing is most people will shine it on and the person wont get the hint and many people will have to endure that person's bad performance; what's funny is the manager would probably side with her, so if they cant get their act together; they'll be out of business. dont give them your business either.

not to mention it's HER fault he was there as long as he was; because he was WAITING FOR HIS DAMN TOAST. god get a clue.

Answer 11

i agree with madlynn, grant it a 20% gratuity on coffee and toast couldnt possibly be more than a dollar, and that had better have been some excellent coffee and toast. if it was a table situation with multiple service personell your presence was occupying anywhere from 15-50% of her possible sales oppotunities. so if she had a 4 table section you knocked her wage down 25% for the time that you were there. if she was the only waitress she most likely had many other responsibilities than what you may have noticed.

Either way you should have dropped a dollar, as long as it wouldnt kill you, because she was probibly killing herself for it.

if thats your regular spot for hanging out you might find that that will become your regular service.