Paternity questioned during divorce, isn't it a man's right to know?

Question

my boyfriend is going through a divorce.he says he questions the paternity of the second child who is only a few months old because he thinks his ex wife was cheating on him and he has been told by a couple people she was seeing her exboyfriend behind his back for quite some time.His lawyer told him that if he questions paternity during the divorce she can get him for mental anguish if the child turns out to actually be his and could cost him more. the lawyer advised him to wait until after the divorce and custody is settled before he questions paternity.he lives in South carolina and the divorce won't be final until august.does this make sense to anyone?i'm wondering if the lawyer is crazy or if my boyfriend is full of crap? he is always trying to be civil and not tick her off, but she is doing anything to screw him over. can someone actually get you for mental anguish if you have real reason to suspect a child isn't yours? isn't it right to know and the child's right? or is he afraid

any reliable way to check paternity without his ex knowing about it?

Answer 1

get the test without her knowing

Answer 2

Tell your BF to get a new lawyer who wants to do their job. IF for any reason your man believes that a child born during the marriage is not his, he can and should question it. He has every right to ask for a paternity test for any child. Here's the draw back....if the child is his he has to pay for the paternity test...however, if the child is NOT his, he can ask the judge to make her pay for the paternity test. Just an FYI - they generally run a minimum of 700, but it could be worth it in the long run considering how much child support can cost someone. Also depending on the divorce laws in South Carolina, he may be able to make her at fault for the divorce IF the child is not his as well. Just some food for thought. Good luck.

Answer 3

I will differ with the panel. If he waits until everything is said and done then when he tries to fix this it will look like he is doing it to get out of paying support. The courts have a way of making something like this stick after the papers have been filed. there are cases where the father found out that he was not the father but because of what was done earlier like signing the birth certificate or taking care of the child for a long period of time, the court ruled in favor of the mother and even though the man was not the paternal father but took that position was made to pay support. after all it's what's in the best interest of the child not it's parents. so tell him he should get a paternity test w/o her knowing and go from there. good luck...

Answer 4

The lawyers are right. He can always have an independent DNA test done they cost about $500 he will have to bring the child in and have it's mouth swabbed. Most states recognize that a child born in wedlock is the father's responsibility and treat it as such, whether he is or is not the father. But if he does the test on his own he very well will have a good case in court, if the child is not his. However if he is the child's father he will have to pay. But at this point he's going to pay regardless. If he is the dad you need to encourage him to have a relationship with his children I understand it can be hard but the kids are the most important issue here not money. He also needs to take in to consideration if this child has already developed a loving relationship with him that it could very well hurt this child and if it is worth the risk of this child to loose a dad.

Answer 5

Actually if he signed the birth certificate when the child was born....it will make it more difficult. Sometimes you have to show proof before the court will order one (that is where the self DNA comes in play). The court ordered DNA tests does cost about $500.00 HOWEVER, I talked to a lawyer on this, you can order a DNA test on line...I have site $99.00. These they say will not stand up in court..but if you have it done and the child is his no one is the wiser..if the child is not his... then you can petition the court for a court approved DNA and you won't have to worry about it.
But I would defiantly want it done before the divorce and custody is settled!
I've done a little research in this area... it is simple and easy and you will know for sure and $99.00 is a small price to pay for that.

Answer 6

Yes he sure does have a right to know if this is his child or not. He needs to demand a paternity test be done asap. He needs to talk to the courts or a lawyer to have it done. He needs to find out for sure either way.

Answer 7

If he ever gets visitation he can have the child tested without her
For about $175.00 he can swab the inside of her (the child's) mouth with a cotton ball and then do his own and send the test in and she will never know.
I would do this.
There are sites all over the internet that offer this service
It would make the perfect valentines day gift.
p.s. this guy sounds like a creep.
Since he is cheating with you he decided that he would accuse her of the same thing.
UPDATE check out the website below. that was just one of them that I found at it was only 99 bucks

Answer 8

He has the right to know, unfortunatly if he signed the birth certificate it is going to be harder for him to get the paternity test, the court won't order it, he'll have to order and pay for it himself and just wait it out for the results and there's no saying if the divorce court will wait for the results for a ruling.

Answer 9

If your boyfriend has visitation, he possibly could get a DNA sample from the baby then.

I'd listen to his lawyer. If he is paying child support and the child turns out not to be his, he can sue her for the child support that he has paid.

Answer 10

Considering the financial and emotional stakes i would demand it.It's not just about the man's rights there's a child involved here.He probably doesn't want to know,he probably has a bond with that child.And it would be wrong for you to force him into anything.He needs to work this out for himself.

Answer 11

nicely if he keeps although the divorce and under no circumstances mentions it then he will be named the daddy and ordered to pay newborn help. once that order is made he's the daddy from then on financially no matter if no longer biologically.