Is 20 too young to get married?

Question

w're already engaged and i have the ring but i keep putting planning the wedding off. i love my man and we have a one year old baby girl together, we been together for 3 years. but there are things about him that i dont like. is that normal? i know that no one is perfect but he makes me soo mad sometimes, and im not sure if thats okay, but i love him sooo much and i love things about him alot more then i dont. when your married are u just sopposed to put aside the other persons faults???

Answer 1

I got married when I was 20- and I wish I would have waited. I love my husband, but I feel like I didn't experience life. (I was pregnant when we got married, feeling like a s*ut, so I thought I HAD to get married. I figured "I've already messed up and got pregnant. If I don't get married, I'll be a horrible person.") Marriage is a personal decision. The fact that you say there are more things about him that you love than there are things you dislike is a very good sign. Yes, there will be times when you will both drive each other up the wall and you'll be ready to throw your hands up and quit. But marriage takes work. You'll find out that love is NOT a dopey, dreamy feeling. I think the best advice I ever got about love came from one of my college professors. She told me "Love is a choice you make." You have to choose to love your spouse. If you're committed to him and want to make it work, go for it!

Answer 2

Look, I am not trying to tell you that you are a child. Because you aren't However, 20 is too young. When I was 20 I was way different than when I was 27. Your 20s are the best time to be single because you are going through so many changes. You don't need to be in a rush to settle down. I will tell you one thing, I am glad as all get out that I did not marry the guy who asked me to marry him when I was 18. Because I am 27 now and absolutely have found the right match for me. A lot can change by the time you hit 20. Marriage is a big thing. Don't settle for the first guy who asks at your age. You want to be more experienced going into a marriage. I am not trying to say for you to be slutty, but you want to have more relationships so you can know exactly what you do and don't want in a relationship. That's what relationships are about when you are young. Learning what you do and don't like about who you are with. PLEASE do not marry when you are 20. I guarantee you that you will regret it when you get older. He may seem like a catch now but if you just wait you'll find someone who knocks the socks off of this man. good luck

Answer 3

Overall I would say in general 20 is way too young to be married. Most people that age are not mature enough and need time to explore, develop themselves, get an education and grow. I never understood why anyone would want to make that kind of commitment so young. That being said - you already have a child with him and FYI that is more of a commitment than getting married. If you were married, never had chrn and divorced you would never see him again. When you have a child w someone married or not that binds them too you forever - no escape, unless someone abandons the child. Also you now have to consider your child w every decision and what is best for her.
Your doubts are normal, you have to accept his faults if you intend to marry him and if not learn to put up w them because you too will be seeing alot of each other either way until your child is an adult.

Answer 4

Now days it might be considered too young. But I got married at 19 in 1977 and it lasted a full 22 years. Now I am married again to a wonderful man and very happy. For me, love is better my second time around. Now days....women are getting married after school when they are older....But you have a child. That's why I married the first time. Don't make a mistake and be sure...
Far as your age, I don't think your too young. But is he same age as you??? Men don't mature as quick as we do. So trust your feelings and think about it a while. If he is older and mature.....It will be a good thing. Don't think your too young. Years before I was born girls married much younger than that and being a nurse in the hospital, I take care of a lot of elderly people who have just had a 50 or 60th wedding anniversary...They are very happy and when I ask, most of them were married by the age of 14 or 15.....So go with your feelings, that's all that matters. if it feels good, go for it.....Good luck.

Answer 5

no you dont put them aside, you just accept them for they are. Really, at the end of the day, if theres love theres everything. Unfortunately not everyone's the same so you come to the conclusion that you might as well accept his "faults" or your life will just stick with the bad habits he has and make your life miserable. Look, m married too. I have been for 2 years. He was 20 and i was 26. I could kill him sometimes but i love him to bits and a marriage its not just about arguments and misunderstandings. Its also about the fun times you share together. Its about acceptance and respect. If there's that, then go for it.

Answer 6

Everyone has faults! That will never change and 9 chances out of 10 the second you say I do you'll find more. I've been married almost 6 years and trust me I feel the same way you do! I married at 20 too and I don't regret a thing. But always trust yourself!

Answer 7

I don't think 20 is too young to get married. I think if you know that person is the one and you are ready for the next step, then you should definitely take it with him. Personally, I think marriage is just more of an official note that you are together.

Nobody is perfect and the flaws that people carry are things that you love about them.

Answer 8

Girl I got married when I was 20 I had a 1 year old baby girl. We had good times, and got along great im 22 now with another child with him and am getting a divorce it all changes. And it shows if you are asking this question then you are unsure and DEFINATELY need to hold off untill you are POSITIVE that this is what you want.

Answer 9

Basically, yes. My husband of 19 years does things that drive me absolutely up the ever lovin' wall, and he makes me furious with him, but I would never imagine a life without him. I know there are things that I do that drive him batty too. I'm talking stupid stuff like I leave my sewing machine plugged in and he tends to let newspapers pile up. He hates it when I get all emotional over nothing, and I can't stand it when he gets upset over stuff that can't be helped at work. How do we make this work? We overlook the things that we each do that annoy us. He knows I hate it when his papers pile up, they still pile up, have for 19 years, probably will for the rest of his life. It's not going to change. I know he hates it when I leave my sewing machine plugged in and left on, but I'll do that when I'm in the middle of a project, and have done it for 19 years, and probably will not change.

Also, you need to get married, I would normally say that 20 is pretty young, but you've already got a baby, give that child a family with 2 parents who are married to each other, and devoted to each other. She deserves that.

Answer 10

20 is not to young to get married but if you are in doubt about getting married then you shouldnt. It appears you may need some pre-marital counselling to sort out your problems BEFORE you come to a final decision. Your partner may not be aware that you have these feelings.
Remember no-one is perfect and life has its ups and downs, only by working through problems together can you succeed in a fruitful and truthful marriage. Problems in a marriage will manifest if not dealt with BEFORE committing.
One of my philosophies in life is ''WHEN IN DOUBT, DO NOTHING''
Good Luck