I suspect I'm a childish, irresponsible man. How can I change?

Question

I'm an honest, confident twenty-nine-year-old man but I'm living in poverty and I don't think I'll ever climb out. I feel discontented with myself that I am not a mature adult. For one thing, I procrastinate too much. For another, I might be a compulsive spender and a money "drunk." What advice can you give me to help me deal with such circumstances?

Answer 1

It takes time. Don't be hard on yourself.

Answer 2

keep suspecting) at twenty nine your life is before you, /poverty, like in a dump nowhere dwelling, or the street, just leave "go west young man" go west, learn to drive, go to those work aday agencies, join the army, for real, get an education, when you are fifty nine, and are the same, you will need not be suspicious any longer, so get with it, you know what is said about procrastination, and here i will change the topic, but give yourself a break and as discontented as you feel, you got to begin somewhere, "the time of salvation is now" that is a quote from Jesus
Move from what you already know, learn to drive, have someone depend upon you, offer your ideas, you must have some ideas about anything, just focus on what you like, or what you want to try, travel around the world, How, that is up to you, really think about it, you probably cannot get even a decent high, saying you're a money drunk, you probably cannot get a decent buzz, good luck, but go beyond luck, everyone who is successful does

Answer 3

It sounds like you need to make (brace yourself, here!!!) a BUDGET!!! AUGH!!!!! That would be an incredibly mature, responsible thing to do. Compulsive spending is probably a big reason why you are living in "poverty" as you put it. It's unlikely you are destitute since you obviously have a computer (unless you're accessing the internet in a library). Even so, there are endless books out there on working out a budget to stay within your means. Let me tell you, having a plan for getting out of debt, even if it will take a while, is still better than being in debt with no end in sight. Also, I would make a habit of reading the want ads in the event something better is out there. Rework your resume and have it ready. Get a part-time job to pay off that debt (it will also keep you busy so you're not spending money foolishly). Get proactive! Once you feel like you're really doing something about your situation, you won't feel so helpless and out of control. Good luck!!! Mean it!

Answer 4

You have to care enough about something to want to change.

There's a great big world out there, one that could absorb all your energies and keep you too busy to even think about indulging your habits. The only problem is, some aspect of it has to engage your interest enough that you want to become involved.

I don't advocate taking the religious route to put meaning into your life, but there must be something that interests you, and you plainly know how to use a computer. Why don't you start looking into what your community offers, places/events you could attend, that don't require a big outlay of funds? I'm not talking about full time activities, just stuff that gets you out of your detrimental routine, maybe once or twice a week. It might hard to get motivated to do it, but think of it as medicine you need. See who's speaking at the nearest college campus, or your town hall. Go watch a documentary film a week in a movie theater. Find a local group that cleans up beaches, or trails. Volunteer to work in a community garden, or do some other kind of work that helps people out. You may have done all of these things before, but it sounds like you need to reconnect with other people, other input, other interests. Find something you can care about.

I'm not suggesting you're going to climb out of poverty doing such things, but you might climb out of the rut you're in. You need to acquire some drive, something to propel you to the next step in your life. At 29, it's not all that unusual to find oneself adrift, but I suspect you're not happy, or you wouldn't be asking this question.

Answer 5

My first advice for you, which would entirely change your life, is your attitude, especially towards yourself. You don't come across as stupid, so the block to your progress is YOU. Did you ever hear the saying, "A house divided against itself, cannot stand"? That sums you up exactly. You're not on your own side. You're not encouraging yourself. And in this state, you will likely fail, as you're working on a self-fulfilling prophecy which is, if you feel like a failure, you will achieve failure. Because it blocks you from trying harder, from pushing yourself beyond your set limits. You will even miss many a solution because your mind is not receptive to being able to receive solutions when it's in an automatic operating mode focused on failure. You cannot make any discoveries, if you are not searching! Read a great book on the power of attitude by Rhonda Byrne called "The Secret". That'll get you started! But to effect any sort of change in your future prospects, you must change the way you're seeing everything. You're your own worst enemy! "Change the way you see things, and the things you see will change!", famous words by Dr. Wayne Dyer, who wrote another great book you should read, "The Power of Intention". You sound like you have a good mind, but you must apply yourself in a specific direction, or nothing will be resolved ever. You are letting yourself float through your life, like a leaf blown about by the wind! It doesn't work that way! You were granted intelligence in the first place, now apply it! And as for you "money drunk" problems, that's a scape goat for you. It's a way of running away from yourself and your problems! Guess what? You can run, but you can't hide! Face up to the situation and quit fooling yourself by the "fantasy" state you put yourself in while spending money. Perhaps, see a therapist. Talk to someone if you feel overwhelmed. But it comes down to you. No one can really do it for you! Try harder and you will succeed!

Answer 6

You just listed everything that that is a hindrance to you. You had the time to see and, analyze your faults. That in its-self shows some smarts and initiative. Now realize that initiative can help you change your circumstances. Give it an honest effort. ( How can you be living in poverty and have money to be a compulsive spender ? )

Answer 7

i think of you have replied your own question. fortuitously you pronounced BF considering the fact which you have a decision and it's time to make a smart one. If he thinks being financially in charge is 'controlling' him then it somewhat is advisable to look someplace else as against attempting an entire life to ultimate it. If his credits is undesirable, so will yours be maximum in all probability in case you marry while you cash will become 'our money'. there is too many different persons around that don't desire fixing to waste time attempting to repair people. With an financial equipment how that's going, astounding now could be no longer the time to get dragged in a financial sinkhole. Im sorry yet consistent with those further info i might might desire to assert stroll away while you could. in case you have data of tests written that paid a million/2 that loan, apply it to your benefit as a historical past of money while going to get your loan and abode.

Answer 8

well accepting your flaws is a positive step.. All you have to do now is take the inniciative anc change..
Think what's important in your life enough to encourage you to keep on target with your goals. Goals are very important.
Set goals for yourself and try to reach them. You'll be able to do that with consistency, which is doing what you said you would after the mood you said it in has gone away... So remember to be consistent and to keep your goals in mind... where do you want to spend your future? In the bahamas, or hawaii taking vacations? hey, it's all possible if you have the right mind set ;)

Answer 9

All I can say isthat recognizing your shortcomings here is half the battle.
Start of small...you can't change your whole life at once. Set small goals, carry a pocket sized planner. Use a calendar, and follow through with things.

Answer 10

grow up maybe? your 29 not 9,create a savings account that you have to actually go to the bank to access.and if you are a compulsive spender then you are hardly in poverty.

Answer 11

Learn how to get your priorities straight first before anything. Find out what it is that you have to do to get yourself out of poverty and onto the right track in life.