am i a lesbian?

Question

well im only 13.
but i really dont want to be lesbian.
whenever i date a boy it only last for like a day and i get this funny felling in my stomache like it could just be that im nervous and not used to boys. I think im attrackted to boys. Please help!

Answer 1

I think a lot of young people struggle with these feelings who are chemically set up to be attracted to the same sex. However, you are still young and you sound as if you are just nervous or unsure of the actual experience you are feeling with boys. You have plenty of time to figure it out. Unless you only have feeling for girls... I suggest you just take your time with boys and process it as you are growing up. There is no time limit on being gay. You either are... are not... or still undecided. Some women take many years until they actually come to the conclusion that they just like women more. So if you have mixed feelings now... don't rush. 13 is so young anyways! You should be enjoying your childhood and not worrying about your sexual orientation! You have plenty of years ahead for that.

Answer 2

Okay, how can I best put this...

First of all, why do you think you're a lesbian? That's the first question you should answer. Simply getting tired of boys quickly doesn't mean that you're gay, just that you haven't really been in a real relationship yet, or that you're not going out with guys for the right reasons. Do you find yourself flushed around girls, giving more than a glance at other girls changing in gym, or maybe find yourself imagining what'd it would be like to kiss a girl? If it's a yes to any of these questions, then you should ask yourself when you started to feel this way. If it's just recently, then you're probably just curious, but if it's for longer, you might very well be bi or a lesbian.

Also, since you don't want to be a lesbian, and if it has nothing to do with what you think people will think of you, but that you simply find the idea replusive, then you are not gay.

Finally, you are only 13, and that's way too young to be deciding for sure whether your gay or not. Just be yourself, and don't limit yourself to labels. Boy, girl, straight, gay, preppy, punk - all labels that restrict you from being you. Let life happen, or else you'll miss all the fun from analyzing too much.

I wish you luck.

Answer 3

I am a little older than you and I think that at your age maybe you get those funny feelings because you are new to dating. Give yourself some time and maybe when you are older you will enjoy boys more. I know because when i was your age i went through the same thing. Now i am married with three kids and I don't even look at women like that.

Answer 4

you should know if you are atracted to boys or girls. your are still young you have so many years ahead to be dating.. try to focus youself on school. boys come later. but ask your self this question. when you look at a girl do you start looking at them in a way you would look at a boy. have you ever looked at a girl or known a girl and would have wanted a relationship other than just friends if so you may be atracted to both..if your date with a boy only last a day then maybe that boy isn't for you. you have to find the right one..there are plenty in the sea. i remember my first date i was feeling the same way you did. its natural. but that didnt mean i wans't atracted to boys. good luck..

Answer 5

Only you know the answer. Are you attracted to girls? Does the thought of kissing a boy make you ill? Don't let anyone tell you what you are. Being 13, you might not know for many years.

No one wants to be Gay, Bi-sexual, Lesbian, or Transgendered. Our society is very cruel to those who are different.

If you were my kid, I would tell you to take your time and decide what you want with your life and not worry too much about boys and girls right now.

Good luck to you.

Answer 6

Give it some time. I remember having lesbian crushes around age 12 and even younger, but I didn't fully figure it out until around age 20. The important thing is not to get too stressed about it, and not to worry so much about the label. As you continue to have relationships and fall in love, things will become clearer. Good luck!

Answer 7

first of all sweety in my opinion you shouldnt be dating now anyway, to me you should be focusing on your studies. secondly no you arent a lesbian, you are more than likely nervous, shoot im 32 and still get butterflies when im on dates with women. also remember this, and im sure there are some who will disagree with what im about to say, being gay is a choice just like anything else we claim to be. you and only you can choose what you want to be or not to be, your mother, father, friends, society, blah blah blah, can only suggest to you what you should be or are, you have the final choice, never ever ever let someone tell you what you are or who you are. i hope this helps you out lil lady, keep your head high.......

Answer 8

your 13 your hormone are all over the place and boys just come and go at your age
your not a lesbian, you didnt mention if you fancy girls.
its proberly taking you longer to be comftable around boys dont worry. some girls never feel comftable arround boys it doesnt mean there a lesbian it proberly means there not confidant enough or very shy.
let the boys come to you that will build your confidance up

good luck and dont worry

Answer 9

It's just normal and doesn't sound like it has anything to do with sexuality. Most boyfriends at your age don't last that long anyway. The nervousness is totally normal. Boyfriends are a totally new thing. Remember, it wasn't that long ago that they were gross and had cooties. They probably are the same, but now you're just able to put up with them ;)

Answer 10

It sounds more like you're 13 and confused, just like a lot of other 13 y/o's out there. Just take the time to figure out your sexuality, expect the realization to not be an overnight discovery, and accept yourself not matter what your sexuality is.