What would you do if your spouce wants you to breast feed but...?

Question

thinks that breastfeeding should not be done infront of anyone... how would you handle this situation??

BTW..the woman does not oppose breastfeeding...but the whole not around anyone thing seems wierd to her...how would you handle...

Answer 1

You kind of lose all right to modesty when you become a mother; it's the father that still gets bashful. When I had my son, I was in a room with seven strangers all watching me squish a human being out of my vagina. It bothered me for about 20 seconds, and then I realized that I should be worrying about my son, and not how shy I was. My son's needs will always come first, and my preferences will always come second. Before my son was born, I thought I'd care about breastfeeding in public, but now I realize that that's a silly thing to be preoccupied with. For millennia, if a baby was hungry, a mother breastfed him, no questions asked. It didn't matter when or where, that's just how it was done and nobody thought anything of it. It's only now that we're trying to turn our backs on nature and make a issue out of something that we shouldn't even have to think twice over. If I'm out of the house with my son and he gets hungry, I simply drape a receiving blanket over his head and my breast, and then let him feed to his heart's content. If anyone has a problem with it, they can just keep on disapproving; I'm not changing a thing to protect other people's insecurities. If anynoe doesn't like the sight of me breastfeeding in public, they can just look away. Bottom line, you do what you think is best for your baby. Everybody else can just deal with your decision, because the decisions is ultimately yours to make.

Answer 2

If you leave the room EVERY time you have to feed the baby, you'll be spending several months alone in a room w/ the baby! Your spouse will get over it. Breastfeeding is absolutely the best thing you can do for your baby, and it's what breasts were made for. It's peoples sexualization of them that is the cause of people being so uncomfortable seeing a woman breastfeeding!

Answer 3

If the person feels that breastfeeding shold not be done around anyone the person can one work there schedule around feeding times or by the cover up they have these new things that look like a poncho and nobody will be able to see any thing and the material is light so the baby can breath. i know breastfeeding in the bathroom in unsanatary but when your desperate sometimes thats what it comes down to

Answer 4

It's pretty simple, really, to just not breastfeed in front of others.

If you're out in public when the baby gets hungry, there are a couple of options. First, you can simply excuse yourself to a quiet corner or the privacy of your car, for the feeding, Second, you can pump the breastmilk into a bottle, for those occasions when you'll be out for a long time, or if you're going somewhere that doesn't have any quiet corners.

I personally agree that breastfeeding is ideal, but should be done in private. On a couple of occasions, I tried to let it be "natural", and it was just uncomfortable. Additionally, it creates a very uncomfortable situation for those around you...some mothers may not care if others see them doing it, but have no fear that the others who have to watch would prefer it to be different.

Answer 5

I am breastfeeding my third baby and just now became comfortable doing it in front of people. However, I cover myself and the baby with a blanket which can get hot for the baby. There are ways to cover yourself with a blanket where only you and the babys mouth are covered but his/her head is not. I only feed in front of the women in my family and my husband or male children. No male adults. I leave the room if a male adult is around. There are also nursing tops for women which makes it easier because you are not exposed. Make sure you also get nursing bras. If you are not comfortable nursing in front of people then don't. If I am away from home and need to leave the room. Then I go into a bedroom or I get in car if I'm in a restaurant. The baby doesn't feed for long so leaving the room isn't that much of an inconvenience. But it is nice not having to carry bottles around.

Answer 6

My husband was kind of weird about that too. With our first daughter, even when I sat in the car (like at the mall), he would be looking around nervously. In public freaked him out. He finally admitted that he thought that other men would be looking at my breasts. Ugh! After baby #2, a total of 2 years breastfeed between the two, he's mellowed out, but still reminds me that "there are alot of weirdo's out there"...don't I know it. Ha Ha. Also, though, some people get terrible uncomfortable about seeing a woman breastfeed and don't know if they should look or look away or avoid the situation all together...maybe he's just terribly shy about it. She should talk to him. Get to the root of the problem. Good luck!

Answer 7

my husband wasn't very big on the whole breastfeeding thing, but he knew it was something I really wanted to do, then he asked how we were suposed to get anything done and go anywhere, because I couldn't breastfeed in public. hahaha, That was my responce. Breastfeeding is the most natural thing a mother can do and if her husband doesn't want her feeding in public, too bad for him, he will have to stay home.

Answer 8

Tell him that you are glad he wants you to breastfeed, but that YOUR comfort is what matters. It isnt a selfish thing, its just... fact. You are the one who has the ..."equipment"... for the breastfeeding. Therefore, if you are comfortable nursing in public, in front of people, then that's your business.
Also, explain to him that it's not like your going to be running around with your **** hanging out all the time... a light blanket tossed ofer your shoulder will cover you up, but allow the baby to breathe, and for latch adjustments to be made, if need be. And most people will see you with the blanket over your shoulder,little baby feet sticking out from the corner, and know what is going on, then generally they respectfully advert their eyes :)

Answer 9

Hello...breastfeeding and public nudity are two totally different things. I exclusively breast feed my baby and I don't "do it in front of anyone" either.

At home, we nurse (and in the beginning I felt weird about doing in front of even my husband..,lol now I just don't care...If you come to my house...you get dinner and a show..lol)..but when we go out...I pump milk and put it in baby bottles and bring extra with us.

I never never nurse outside of the house, unless I'm in a private area.. and I know no one will "walk in" on us.

And frankly...if it's the spouse that has the problem with it...it's really kinda irrelavant. it's the woman's body and the baby's only source of food...the spouses modesty has no part of the discussion...they aren't even part of the equation.

If it was my husband that had a problem with it...he's just have to get over it...the baby's needs are more important.

Answer 10

My boyfriend was the same when we had our first child. He didnt like the idea of people watching me feed. But he soon got over it. I just fed my baby when she was hungry and there wasnt anything he could do. He soon got used to it as if I let her cry instead of feeding her he would get upset cause he felt bad she was crying.
Just explain to him that if the baby is hungry it needs to be fed when it needs to be fed. Babies dont understand that they may have to wait until they are in a more private setting. They just know they are hungry and hungry NOW. They have no concept of time and if left to scream just because its not 'appropriate' to feed, they will become anxious and upset. It will feel like forever to them.
To have a healthy happy baby, you need to feed and hold it whenever and wherever it needs.
He should get over it in time and if he doesnt then thats just tough luck. The mothers duty is to care for her infant, no matter what anyone else says.