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My boyfriend and I have been together now for a few years, and we live together. We are in our late 20's and have no kids. Recently he made the decision to quit his job and go back to school full time. Which I supported this decision. However discussing it before it happened the plan was that he was to get a part time job, now he doesn't want to. I do make enough to support us, but I don't feel I should have to. I see no reason he can't do something. Also- he does nothing to help around the house. And honestly Im getting irritated with it. Should I make him get a job?

2007-02-05 08:05:50 · 21 answers · asked by Worked to the bone. 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

21 answers

Many people go to school and work at the same time. It's unreasonable to expect that from him, especially since that was the original plan. Make him get a job. If you two REALLY don't need the money, then start a savings account and maybe take a very nice trip when he graduates or put it towards a house or wedding, something like that.

2007-02-05 08:17:14 · answer #1 · answered by kathylouisehall 4 · 0 1

Okay b/f all of this took place, yall made an agreement that he would at LEAST get a part time JOB. Part time! So now that he has started full time as a student, he doesn't want to uphold his agreement. Which is dead wrong! You need to sit down with him and put it out on the table like this, from the beginnin you said this is the way things will be but you are not upholdin your part of the bargain so either you need to find a part time job, go to school part time and get a full time job, or help out much more around the house than you are doing at the present time. If you do not uphold these things that I"m discussin with you, my half of the bargain will come to an end. And see how he feels about that. He is takin advantage of you and that is not right. Yeah, it is good that you make enough money to take care of the both of you but eventually you will get BURNT out and that is not right for you. If he agree to work together, then by golly he need to do that. Good luck on your decision and stop feelin guilty about something that you haven't done. If any one should feel guilty, it should be him.

2007-02-05 08:15:24 · answer #2 · answered by jetta 3 · 0 0

All of the answers are correct. Think about this though.... say everything worked out and you graduate and such do you really want a guy like this? Think later down the road and you get married and such. He agreed to get a partime job and didn't follow through after you talked about it. So he can't contribute just a bit or bump up and help around the house now, just to make an effort...... what happens when you are pregnant or sick?

Tell him you love him but he needs to have any job even if he makes nothing. Most guys would just want to be around other people once in a while. At its most basic level he is taking you for granted.

2007-02-05 08:29:01 · answer #3 · answered by jackson 7 · 0 0

YOu only live together and are not married. You should only pay for your half of things that are common. He can take out a loan for his education. You have no legal responsibility for him whatsoever. Make sure you don't co-sign any loan or buy things on his behalf that would put you in debt.

Give notice to the landlord that you are moving out or make it clear that you are only responsible for half of the rent. Make your BF sign the other half of the lease. Make everything clear.

You can't make him get a job. He should get a job after realizing that you are not supporting him.

2007-02-05 08:28:32 · answer #4 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 0 0

YES!!! ...good for him that he is going to school...I hope it betters both of your lives but he needs so work & a part time job won't hurt him any... even if it only pays for gas & a night out once in a while... As far as helping around the house... you might wanna change that before making any long term commitments to him...lol

2007-02-05 08:25:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If I read correctly you said you have NO children. So why continue to support him. He's obviously only thinking of himself if he can't even help with small things around the house. Tell him to get a job or find new living arrangments. Good Luck!

2007-02-05 08:19:26 · answer #6 · answered by Winnie08_98 2 · 0 0

Well, you can't *make* him get a job. He's taking advantage of you, because he can. People go to school, work and have families, all at the same time; there's no reason why he can't. It's your call whether you want to withdraw your support and move on, or continue to play by his rules.

2007-02-05 08:27:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He has time to get a part time job and should want to contribute to the bills etc. Think about what your future could be like if he is doing this now.Also why can't he share in the house hold responsibilities? Tell him you are not his mom you are his partner. Good luck.

2007-02-05 08:11:49 · answer #8 · answered by DESTINY 4 · 0 0

Your courting can in basic terms shop him from getting the interest he needs if he makes it the clarification. In different words, there is not any reason that your courting could shop him from getting employed everywhere. there is not any clarification for him to even enable a destiny boss be attentive to he's in a courting, so how might desire to it keep away from him from getting the interest? as nicely, the better subject is that him saying that places the interest above the courting. A courting is doubtlessly for all times, yet a job is replaceable. there are various extra employers he might desire to artwork for than people he might desire to be in love with. i think of he's using the courting as an excuse, whilst the real reason he's dropping one interest and would possibly no longer get yet another lies with him. there is something approximately him that gets in the way of his employment. And he's no longer treating you o.k. if he's going accountable you for no longer being waiting to get the hot interest. think of approximately it. How might desire to it probably be your fault?

2016-10-01 11:37:30 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

if he is unemployed he should be helping u around the house. maybe before he quit his job their should have been a discussion about this, seems any mature man would already know all this, and if u have to fight with him to do what is right, than he really is immature and takes u for granite. maybe get a new boyfriend this one is way too immature.

2007-02-05 08:19:22 · answer #10 · answered by jude 7 · 0 0

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