What is considered normal visitation amounts in Ontario Canada?

Question

I have recently seperated from my common-law husband with my 2 children and still have court proceedings ahead. I have given visitations of every other weekend and Wednesday evenings. He has told me I am not being fair and that he wants more. I do not want to give him more as I have been with my children 24/7 since the day they where born and all of a sudden now that we have seperated he wants time with them. He says that the amount of time I have given him is not enough or normal and I thought I was giving him plenty. The courts I am sure will decide more but I am curious, am I giving enough or am I being greedy! What is the normal amount of time usually given? Thank you and I look forward to hearing your responses.

Considering that both answers so far have come from an ignorance to my home situation they are understandable and appreciated. I will also fill you in on maybe a bit more information of our family life. The reason I was with my kids 24/7 had nothing to do with him being at work or providing for us, although raising my children has been the best thing ever, I was unable to even go out for a couple of hours. He chose not to spend time with us and has been out of work since my first born was a few months old and been in retraining only in the last couple of years (my eldest will soon be 8). I resent being called somewhat evil without any knowledge of who I am as a person, but I do appreciate your answers. I understand that you have no clue as to the way I or my children where treated so of course you would jump to the defense of the dad who only now that we have left has decided he wants to spend time with them. I guess maybe not the answers I was looking for but appreciate the honesty!

Answer 1

Personally, I think the fact that you were with the kids 24/7 while he was out earning a living so you and the kids could live is meaningless.

If he didn't have to earn a living, he too could be with the kids 24/7.

So come up with a plan that is closer to 50/50 and sleep well at night.

Just because you want to be seperated from your husband is no reason to have more time with the children than you offer him.

Every other weekend and two nights each week is a good start.

So for every two weeks or 14 days. Each of you has three over nights, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, and then two over nights during the week. That is a total of 7 days for each of you every two weeks.

Split up birthdays, so he gets them one year and you the next. The same for other holidays, etc.

It's no big deal.

Don't keep your kids away from their father just because you don't want to be with them.

EDIT,

Even with the edits (and I worked very carefully to write in a non-judgmental way since I was well aware that I did not have all the details. I still stand by my assertion that he should have at least as much parenting time as you do. You still have not cited any abuse, just differences in how the two of you parent.

Since you have not presented any concrete reasons why he is a bad parent, I still stand by my answer.

To me, in training for a new job IS part of earning a living. His job was to become employable.

If you have real abuse, then alert the authorities and get the children to safety. If what you have is what I believe it is, merely a difference of opinion, then my answer still stands.

Answer 2

What is considered normal visitation amounts in Ontario Canada?
I have recently seperated from my common-law husband with my 2 children and still have court proceedings ahead. I have given visitations of every other weekend and Wednesday evenings. He has told me I am not being fair and that he wants more. I do not want to give him more as I have been with my children 24/7 since the day they where born and all of a sudden now that we have seperated he wants time with them. He says that the amount of time I have given him is not enough or normal and I thought I was giving him plenty. The courts I am sure will decide more but I am curious, am I giving enough or am I being greedy! What is the normal amount of time usually given? Thank you and I look forward to hearing your responses.

Answer 3

I'm an Ontario resident and I think you have given your common law partner a lot of visitation rights honestly! some dads are lucky if they get there kids once a month for a weekend! When my Parents divorced my dad would get us every other weekend and that was it, he wasn't aloud to attend any of our birthdays or any holidays In a month he wasn't aloud to celebrate them with us. If us kids didn't want to go to dads that weekend we didn't have to! I think as a mother your doing the right thing for your children but the other thing is if your kids are old enough and feel they want to spend more time with dad let them and the other thing is The Courts will probably only give him every other weekend it's common the made that decision for my parents unless the two of you can come to an agreeing on visitations the courts really like that because then the can see that both of you have your children at interest

Answer 4

Having dealt with family court in Ontario before, I can tell you that you will not have trouble finding a judge who agrees with you.

It's very unfortunate.

You give him 2.5 days out of 14. That is 18% for him. 82% for you. You think HE is being selfish???

Just like you want to be around your kids, so does he. You are being greedy, punishing and, I dare say, downright evil.

To answer your question, however: what you are saying is normal. Grotesquely unfair, but normal.

EDIT well sorry for jumping down your throat, but you gave no indication of him being a neglectful father. In fact, I was led in the other direction. Based on the information you initially provided, I don't think I was being unfair at all. And maybe I still don't.

Here's the real question - are the children better off with their father or without?

If the answer is with - you should not try and stop or limit the visitation. If he was lousy then and decent now, isn't that better then lousy then and lousy now?

Don't let your anger, hurt and spite drive your decisions. They will only hurt your children.

Also, you say he has been out of work since your first born was a few months old. Why did you keep having kids? I think you knew what kind of man you moved in with but stayed with him anyways.

p.s. I do miss Ontario sometimes, but man it was cold in Ottawa. And Mel Lastman was funny.

Nooooooooooooooooooooobody!

Answer 5

this is delicate , so i will say : why not giving him a chance and see if he does take good care of the children while in his care ? this would be for starter , their are HIS kids as well ........it would give you time to rest a bit and do something you may not have done in your life .........or had the time to go ?
DO know THIS :nobody in life belong to anybody !
please give him a chance .....the children probably love their FATHER more than likely :-)
as for the rest ? i am not into your business .:-)