My friend got pregnant and then found out she had cancer in the uterus and lost the baby how can i help her?

Question

My friend Nicole is very independent. Before christmas she found out she was pregnant and didn't tell anyone. She then found out she had cancer in the uterus and had two options: 1.Have surgery to remove the maybe canerous cells and take the chance of loosing the baby or 2. Have the baby with no surgery and take the chance of dieing. She didnt' tell anyone. She then found out that she had no choice but to have the surgery because it was cancer for sure and it was going to be on the 28th of december. On the 27th she told her parents.

Today she told me that she had this problem and lost the baby. Now she wants me to be her alibi because she may have more problems and she doesn't want to disturb her parents hollidays so she told them she was going to Athabasca (8 hours away) with me to see my husband. She is leaving tonight after work at 10:00 pm and doesn't want me to come. i am worried about her and i don't want her to drive that far especially late at night after work. Help

Answer 1

I wouldnt really know how to advise on the medical front, but we all know what cancer is. And now that she lost her baby, she found out she has cancer, and shes going to drive 8 hours to some place, even you dont know. If I got your question right, she is going to Athabasca to do this surgery, isnt it ?? Do you think she can handle this all alone ? Where is her husband ? With or without husband, you are her true freind, and you must sternly but lovingly tell her that she shouldnt be really playing around this way. Its dangerous....not only physically, but also emotionally, for her to handle this entire issue.

You could really go with her yourself, or you'd hve to really really get a freind, or someone whom she could trust, if not her parents, but someone close and mature enough to understand. And do it quick, before its too late. If something goes wrong, you'd keep that in your mind for the rest of your life, and you'd keep blaming yourself for not saving the situation in time. And thats just natural, though it may not be your fault at all..So, go and get someone, talk to her, there should be someone I am sure, who could go along with her, and take care of this matter the way she wants it..Or...you could make sure that she is safe, perhaps call you in between during halts...i donno,, but I would still suggest you find out everything you can, and do whatever you can....I am sure you can weight the situation much better..

good luck

Answer 2

she needs to bring a person to these doctor's appointments for support...so, she either lets you go with her or encourage her to tell her parents so they can help her through this

Answer 3

i think she should confess to her parents about something this serouis, and she shouldn't really drive that late in her condition, i don't like seeing things like this, i hope she gets better!

Answer 4

do what your friend says . if she doesn't want you to go, don't go because she trusts you so keep that trust.