My best freind has recently split withher bubby of 2 years. He has a son from a previous relationship. And the two mothers dont get along. Basically my freind told her if your child comes around mine I will kill him! My freind found out that her daughter and hubby was seeing his son behind her back for a year. So they had a arguement and he called it quits! Basically she never cooked cleaned did laundry. He did after worked 14 hours a day 6 days a week. She always screamed I take care of our 2 year old daughter thats a job on its own. All of us know that she caused the divorce but I'm the only one thats stuck around for her to cry on. What dod I do!! How do I help her with the healing process.! She doesnt understand why my marriage of 18 months(including dating)is perfect verses something that has been together a total of 3 years. What can I do to help her! I mean I dont want to completely rub it in her face that its her fault but she thinks its not! HELP!
2007-02-05 05:47:32 · 4 answers · asked by I'm a mommy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You may want to get the book "When Friendship Hurts" . Its a girlfriends guide to having healthy friendships and getting out of bad ones. I read it years ago..I got rid of 2 bad friends and have awesome women friends in my life now.
Seems to me she have some serious issues!
2007-02-05 06:52:46 · answer #1 · answered by Soulfulgrl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long are you going to tell your friend to pick herself off ground zero, the reality of divorce is people have to help themselves. God helps those who help themselves.
I really don't know what your friend wants, she had it all. Her husband did so much for her, maybe that is what type of person she is really co-dependant.
Your friend needs the reality of hard knocks maybe she has needed people to be there helping her as a crutch all along. I would call her lazy, spoiled, selfish and I would say you had it all! Not too many men do what he did for you. I would have 15 hour days sometimes, come home to an emty house with no supper cooked.
Marriage should be a 50-50 item except your friend was operating on a 10-90 effort to pitch in and help. Boy! if I had a working man I would massage his toes and run his bath water every day. I would have a candelight romantic supper every evening for him. Appreciation, respect, over burdening him Any man would have enough of your lazy friend.
My last husband was like a little boy who loved being outdoors and taking it easy being on unemployment insurance.
Be straight forward maybe you will be cleaning up and doing her laundry for her unless you establish your own boundaries with this person. It would be hard to do this but I would tell my friend to grow up and act her age and get a job/education.
Your friend by not accepting responsibility and being truthful about her own actions tells alot about the person. What now?
Hubby should should come crawling saying he was wrong, I would never ever blame this man for moving out.
2007-02-05 06:08:43 · answer #2 · answered by Emily L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don`t metion it to her, try to hang out with her, but don`t bring it up try and keep her mind off it as much as possible. Make her feel like it`s not even happening, she`ll soon accept that it`d prob be better this way. All you can do is keep being a good true friend to her, and always being there for her. Not to seem mean, but the whole world is like this these days, its like a normal thing for parents to be split up, it is a rarity to find a couple still together for beyond 20 years and not divorced. Good Luck
2016-05-24 18:42:42 · answer #3 · answered by Kimberly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TELL HER THE TRUTH! tell her that she caused it or she will never change the behavior and continue this. she never should have kept him from his sonl. what a selfish person she is he is better off, she's lazy, and sounds like a tool
2007-02-05 05:51:46 · answer #4 · answered by christine z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋