My grandmother left me a house. I moved in a few years back. I met someone and he moved in with me. We have lived together for the past two years. We have had our ups and downs. When we met i knew that he liked to smoke weed, and that wasn't my thing.However, i didn't really care if he did it. I never had people in and out of my home, nor any other kind of illicit activity. It was that way for a reason. Well now, he wants to invite people over and have them smoke too. I disapprove. I stayed home sick, and he invited at least 4 folks over to smoke with him. I was resigned to the bedroom. I feel like if I say something about this type of thing he won't understand.
2007-02-05 05:46:10 · 16 answers · asked by prettydebutante 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First take weed out of the equation. Living together or being married requires a certain way of being. It means one cares about that person and their concerns above all else..... it's two people as a team having a life. To have people over when you are sick says it all. Your boyfriend doesn't care about you deeply no matter how you cut it.
Insert weed back in. Well lots of guys like to go to happy hour once in a while. Even if one smokes cigarettes if your other doesn't like it you go outside. Thats what you do. Having his pals over means that he needs them more than you. Instead of working on your relationship he is drawn to them to fulfill a need. Secondly your grandmother left you this house for a reason. It was an amazing opportunity to give you a leg up in the world and obviously she cared for or saw something in you. Are you going to throw this away on somebody who has no real stake in this? He could just walk away.
The only thing you can do is not seek his understanding but put your foot down. He is not even a smart pot smoker as having people over all of the time will lead to trouble. So getting understanding is doubtful. Tell him that you don't want smoking in the house and the friends are not welcome...... period. Even his friends will get this as most likely they were wondering how long it would take you to get to this most standard of positions. Even his friend realize that he is using you as no women would put up with this as they are not smoking at their house. They are using him as well.
Put your foot down, no discussion and no nothing. His response will tell you everything. I'm sorry to say but odds are you will end up getting rid of him. Find out now before it is too late. If he steps up to the plate.... great. But otherwise you will be free to find someone who loves, cares and appreciates you.
2007-02-05 06:53:44 · answer #1 · answered by jackson 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is your house and by smoking weed and inviting his pothead friends over is disrespecting you and your home Tell him that you will not allow this to go on one more day. He he can't handle that then show him the door Good luck
2007-02-05 13:53:34 · answer #2 · answered by Bonduesa 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your grandmother left the house to you! That gives you every right to tell him, you don't want him and his friends smoking weed in your house. I would tell him, you don't want him doing that, in your house, and if he wants it that bad, he should go over to his friends house and smoke it. If for instance, he gets caught smoking it in your house, you can get in trouble for it also. If he doesn't except your rules or wishes, then tell him he needs to find another place to live.
2007-02-05 14:02:32 · answer #3 · answered by Chihuahua Lover 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but who cares if he doesn't understand?? he should respect you and YOUR house... not to mention that what he's doing is illegal, and if he gets caught, you could lose your house just for being in the same room with him and his friends while they're smoking. If he get's mad at you for telling him you're not comfortable with his drug use, then so be it, you'll be better off without him.
2007-02-05 13:52:52 · answer #4 · answered by kebbs32 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It really doesn't matter if he understands or not... YOU are responsible for your house if the cops come knocking on your door! That is illicit activity by the way. Good luck.
2007-02-05 13:51:49 · answer #5 · answered by Lila 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to him, tell him you don't approve of him smokin weed and especially when you are home sick he invites people over to do it to that is RUDE. It is your house, tell him his options or break up. You get caught with weed in your house they can take it.
2007-02-05 14:47:16 · answer #6 · answered by chiefs fan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
who cares, you should not feel powerless IN YOUR HOME! lay down the law and tell him if he doesn't like it to hit the road, if he won't leave, call the cops, or this will be your life for the next 40 years. what a great dad he'll make, get rid of him fast.
2007-02-05 13:58:00 · answer #7 · answered by christine z 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Giving up the goods for free to a BOY for two years now and now you are wondering why he still acts like a BOY.
Rule one never give it up to a boy, you save yourselves a lot of problems that way.
2007-02-05 14:12:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your house. You have the right to be upset. You have to stand up for yourself, your home, and your lifestyle in your home. Tell him what you want (your rules) in your house, and if he can't abide by them, then he can leave. Tell him he has 30 days to change, or get out.
2007-02-05 13:53:40 · answer #9 · answered by ndngrlz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares if he understands or not. Tell him NO MORE WEED IN THE HOUSE OR YOU CAN LEAVE! Stick to your guns! He gets caught and you could lose your house!!
2007-02-05 13:49:47 · answer #10 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋