I'm married now for over 10 years, pregnant with our 4th child. My hubby is a great guy but I have a question for you out there. A little about him, he just joined a bike club, he has lots of friends and from time to time he hangs out. We usally hang out too, but just the 2 of us or us and family. I've never been to one of the "bike parties" but see some pictures of the parties. And it bothers me that some of the other guys take their wives. It also bothers me that me that he doesn't like to take me around his friends too much. Why is that? Is it a guy thing or is it me? I mean friends bbq's, his job parties, friends birthdays ect. i alsways take him with me when I get invited out. Can anyone tell me why he does this. it's really bothering me. I ask him he says it's because it's him and the guys but as I said I've seen pictures of him the guys and thier other halves. I don't hang out without him, I don't have girls night out either. I'm a good mom/wife. What should I do? I'm sad!
2007-02-05 05:35:50 · 16 answers · asked by jstarz07 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ps: I am very pretty, sexy, and look great for having my 4th child. He's very good looking too. We're a pretty nice looking couple.
2007-02-05 05:53:33 · update #1
Ask him if he's embarrassed of you? If he says he's not, than tell him that you'd like to go out to one of the parties with him like his friends do with their wives. Tell him that you're starting to think that he's ashamed of you, and that you like going to parties too. If he still says No, start going out by yourself. Leave him at home and go out. Go out on a girl's night out and see how it feels. Don't even ask him if you can go, just do it. Tell him you're going to a party like he's been doing. Don't ask him to join you. It seems to me that he doesn't appreciate what he has. Show him that you need a life too. Good Luck.
2007-02-05 05:42:33 · answer #1 · answered by K9Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is one of two things; either he doesn't want you around because he is insecure with you being around his guys friends and doesn't want you to get hit on or he wants to pretend he is single. I have went to many biker parties and there are young girls totally naked and lots of drinking and drugs. He probably is having a better time without you there. As most husbands would. My husband has done this to me also and it really hurts. I know exactly how you feel. This what I did to my husband after putting up with his crap for 9 years I turned the table on him. I started hanging out at the bars with a female friend and leaving him home and uninvited with the kids, at first he acted like it didn't bother him, but eventually he exploded. I told him... I guess you can know to relate to how you made me feel all those years. It sucks doesn't it? I continued doing this for another 6 months every Friday despite his attitude, now he is always wanting to take me along. Sometimes I go, sometimes I don't. I found out I really do have a lot more fun without him! Just don't give in too early.
2007-02-05 13:52:18 · answer #2 · answered by Destiny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok if you know that there are other wives there then why dont you find someone to watch the kids for you. when you know he will be attending one of these parties just show up. there is a reason he doesnt take you and you already know that. this is an example but might not be your case.... a girlfriend of mine got a stripper for her husbands birthday one year (it was a secret) she invited all the guys from her husbands work and told them to bring their wives. (because she had requested a old lady stripper who turned out to be 60 but none of the guys invited knew this) A few days after the party one of the wives that was told by the husband she wasnt invited found out that she was in fact invited........he didnt want her there because he thought it was going to be a young hottie
2007-02-05 13:51:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he have something to hide? Are you suspecting that there might be another woman he has his eye on?
Why don't you do this- find out when his next bike party is and show up unexpectedly. You have every right. And if he gets mad, then he's hiding something. He should want to show his wife off. Don't be afraid to try what I told you. And if it makes you feel better, go with a friend or family member, but don't let your husband know what you're doing.
2007-02-05 13:41:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe he isn't proud to be around you (I know that sounds shallow), sounds like he is in good shape, are you? Are the other wives that go to these events bikers as well ? Another reason is maybe he is having an affair with a girl in the club, would explain why he wouldn't want you to know the other club members (they might spill the beans).
2007-02-05 13:45:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell him how you feel he might think you won't like his friends and also feels that not everything his friends do that he has to do. You can try tell him if you don't take me at least to one of these events that you will sleep on the couch for a week. Sounds that your hubby is affraid of something if it really bothers you you have to talk to him. Good luck
2007-02-05 13:46:07 · answer #6 · answered by laurechery 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people don't realize that just because you are married doesn't mean that you should not have your own time. My husband has friends that I don't hang out with and I don't have a problem with him hanging with them. We both enjoy our friends together and other friends separately.
2007-02-05 13:52:06 · answer #7 · answered by Alaska 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
definitely make some time for hanging with the girls. doing this DOES NOT make you a bad mother. then ask him if you can try hanging out at the nex t bbq so that you can meet his new friends. then go from there.
2007-02-05 13:40:37 · answer #8 · answered by mo b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it could be a few things. one, maybe because you have 4 kids it is harder to have the freedom of both of you going out, he may figure it is just easier to go then to go through the babysitter. two, ive learned men dont think on their own. they need to have a lot spelled out for them before they even realize it is a problem. he may think you dont wanna go, that it is not your thing. if all is great between you and him im sure if you mention it he will then realize. good luck
2007-02-05 13:47:12 · answer #9 · answered by yankeesarethechamps 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah I know u r a good mom...
First of all u need to know whether it is true the fact that some people are concern about their own wifes health or something..
Then have a good discussion with ur husband...Out of ur kids knowleadgable....
Third have a lot of pray...that will solace ur heart...
Then u decide what is next...
2007-02-05 13:54:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋