I have a niece who is engaged to be married and has just found out that her fiance' is already married to another woman. He got married and stayed with this woman for less than 30 days. They never got the marriage anulled and he told my niece he was afraid to tell her because he loves her and doesn't want to lose her. She found out because her fiance's mother got a phone call from the long lost wife, and she called my niece and told her.
I have had these two over to my house before, and I know that they love each other. My niece's problem is that she now finds it hard to trust him. They were both in tears over this, but now she wants to call off the wedding. Anyone with serious advice I can give her.
2007-02-05 05:08:26 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my first thought is that if she didn't know he was previously married then maybe she doesn't know him well enough to marry him yet... furthermore in some states you have to be divorced for a certain amount of time before you can get another marriage certificate . and last but certainly not least i think i would have a trust issue with some one who can not be open and honest with me and if this relationship is not built around trust than what will the marriage be built on?i don't think love alone is enough . if they really love each other than they should have no problem waiting a year or two so they can see if thay can build back there trust
2007-02-05 05:24:14 · answer #1 · answered by vegas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be afraid to trust him, too. Think about it, if the mother never found out and called your niece, this is something the fiance would have kept from her as long as he could.
Marriage is not about keeping secrets. And your niece is right for having doubts, and she shouldn't marry someone when she is having those doubts. What else is he keeping from her? Diseases? And when he gives her a disease and it's too late, is he going to say, "Oh, but you wouldn't have wanted to marry me if I told you I contracted diseases..."
I wouldn't marry him. Your niece is absolutely right.
2007-02-05 05:30:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she should call it off until things are settled. This guy needs to get this other marriage thing taken care off. I would say the trust issue will be a big thing for a while. Just slow it down.
2007-02-05 05:12:48 · answer #3 · answered by angelscordi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one can control what the other person does...Nothing is 100% ever...He may be really sorry and mean it, right now..but later down the line things can change.
Everyone has a past, that trust plays an issue in it.
She must decide on her own, she can't control him, even a person without any deception can decieve later on down the line.
2007-02-05 05:25:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before he considers getting married for the second time he must end the marriage that he is currently in...even if he doesn't see the current wife. Your friend is right not to trust her "friend" because he has misled her already.
2007-02-05 05:12:47 · answer #5 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG Wow don't marry him just dont!!!! What kind of a husband will he be if he hides something from her this early on!!! He CAN'T be trusted. If he really wnted her and truly loved her he would divorce his wife and then get married.
2007-02-05 05:19:46 · answer #6 · answered by sallyandlula 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her fiance made a very stupid mistake for a very good reason. She needs to postpone the wedding until the annulment then learn to trust him again.
2007-02-05 05:12:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll bet the Fiance's mother would love the wedding called off. What a ***** his mother is for interfering! She should be called off!
2007-02-05 05:13:00 · answer #8 · answered by jacquie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shes right she should call of the wedding and find a guy that will respect her and not lie to her from the beginning, good luck.
2007-02-05 05:13:59 · answer #9 · answered by misty blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm pretty sure it's illegal for them to get married, if he's married to someone else, so I would say that it should be called off until everything gets sorted out.
2007-02-05 05:11:26 · answer #10 · answered by jaye 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋