I'm 15, one of my best friends is going through a bad phase. She's messing up, going out with bad crowds, I know for several times she drank. I think she's in danger, I talked with her but she doesn't listen to me, says she wants to enjoy life while she can. I don't what to do. She has a bro, but he's 12 and I don't think talking to him would be a good idea. The problem is my friend's parents are kinda harsh, so if I talk with them I'm afraid of what they can do do her. Actually, one reason I think she messes up is her parents are so strict that she wants some freedom. But she's going to far. I can talk with my parents, but I don't see what they can do but talking to her parents, and thi I don't want. So, I dont know how to help her. That's the problem with harsh parents, when their kids messes up you can't count on them, becaus instead of loving parents they will act like the chieg of a concentration camp.
2007-02-05 03:57:57 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
i think you should talk to her yourself first..and think if there is anyone older that she respects, like a close aunt or a boss, maybe an older cuzin...you should tell her you're worried, i don't think you should tell your parents..b/c your right, they will proberly take it over the top, but maybe a guidance counselur (dont mind my spelling lol) can help as well, they cant get her in trouble or anything, they deal w. this sh@t everydaie. hope i can help
2007-02-05 04:03:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
See if you can arrange a meeting with you, her, and a school counselor. The counselor may be able to get to the heart of the matter and help your friend. Even though you say you don't want to talk to your parents about it, it may be a good idea to do so.
The only thing is: you are not responsible for what your friend does, even though you fear for her, she has to learn the hard way (it would seem).
Maybe, if you have done everything you can think of to help your friend, it would be best for you to tell her you can't hang around with her anymore if she continues the way she is. It may not seem like a very good solution, but it may wake her up to what she is doing.
You say her parents are too harsh and you think that may be the reason she is rebelling. Many parents don't realize that being overly protective and strict only causes their children to rebel. But, remember that they are only doing what they think is best, right or wrong. Consider talking to them, though, because they do love their child and want to protect her. Or have your parents talk to them about their daughter.
Good luck. You are a very good person to be so concerned with your friend.
2007-02-05 12:36:22 · answer #2 · answered by Nepetarias 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her parents. . . if you care about her (and obviously you do). What is better. . . a friend mad at you or a friend dead because of binging or a car accident or something like that. If she isn't stopped this is her future. People who are out of control are exactly that and they can end up in far worse circumstances that to have someone try to help them.
She can still choose to mess up even after that, but if you don't help her, the alternative is far worse.
2007-02-05 13:43:02 · answer #3 · answered by snddupree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel comfortable confiding with your mom or dad, talk to one of them and see if they can steer you in the right direction. I think you care about this person and you are trying to be a good friend. But, sometimes you can't help a person that doesn't want to be helped. Do you have another mutual friend that you could confide in? Maybe you two could put your heads together and come up with a solution.
2007-02-05 12:27:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in your friends shoes before. Try speaking with a teacher, guidance office, office staff, or even try your school resource officer if you have one. The school resource officer is actually probably going to be your best bet because he's there to be the buffer between parents and children and often times between the kids and school, kids and other law enforcement officers. He also has information that he can give her. GL
2007-02-05 13:47:11 · answer #5 · answered by Tiggs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest talking to your parents. Not only do they know the girls personality, but they might be able to talk to her. She might appreciate advice coming from an adult rather than someone her own age.
I had a similar situation where my friend was being abused. My mum and dad talked to him and he got help because he said it felt like an adult actually cared.
Try it, it can't hurt....
2007-02-05 12:05:33 · answer #6 · answered by bpbjess 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with some others on here about taking it to a teacher or counselor. Or do you guys attend a church? Talk to the youth director or pastor. Maybe there is an adult lady that she looks up to.
2007-02-05 12:49:25 · answer #7 · answered by april_hwth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to a teacher that you're close to or your school counselor....maybe they can talk to your friend.
The worse thing that can happen to your friend is not her parents being hard on her....think about it.
2007-02-05 12:06:11 · answer #8 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to a church counselour, not your school because they take it way to far also. But she does need to do something, she wont have a future becides jail, so just dont follow in her path.
2007-02-05 12:44:03 · answer #9 · answered by meg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just set her down and tell her how u feel and if that didn't work then there's not much u can go sept tell her parents or do some thin to make her feel guilty
2007-02-08 19:44:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋