I Know NoOne is a doctor but please can someone give me some advice as to what I should do?

Question

I have been trying to convieve since May of '06 and got succesful about 3 months ago but when I went to get an ultrasound at 10 wks. the baby was no longer with us. I had a DNE the day after and (the day before thanksgiving) and we have since been trying but can't seem to be succesful, we already have a wonderful 2 year old but can't seem to figure out what could be wrong? Any answers or any tips on what I should do? I want to see a specialist to make sure nothing is wrong but I am scared that they won't have any answers or that I am worrying over nothing. I know it takes time and effort to have a baby but I think I have given it my all and still cant be successful. Please I am open to any comments please help. Thanks.

Answer 1

What you are (could be) experiencing is called Secondary Infertility.
For a percentage of adult couples desiring children, infertility is a problem they not only don’t know they have but, in fact, are sure they don’t have. Their first children are conceived with ease and they have no reason to believe that making that child a big sister or big brother will be any more difficult…until they actually try to do so. Much has been written on whether secondary infertility is more or less psychologically devastating and while the debate will rage on, all agree that for anyone who wants children (or more children) the emotional pain is real and intense.

Secondary infertility is generally defined as the inability of a couple to conceive after a year of unprotected and appropriately timed intercourse when one or both partners have previously conceived children.

Common Causes:

1.Age

The most prevalent cause of secondary infertility may be age. Much has been written about aging and women’s fertility. Women are born with all of the oocytes they will ever have and female fertility peaks in the mid-twenties to mid-thirties. Menopause, of course, occurs when there are no more oocytes. The decrease in fertility by 35 years of age is marked. By age 40 the spontaneous pregnancy rate is significantly lowered and at age 45 the chances of natural conception with unprotected and well timed intercourse are, at best, approximately 6% per cycle. Older oocytes (eggs) have been around longer and have been exposed to more environmental factors which may contribute to a decrease in egg quality. Single gene mutations may be responsible for spontaneous interruption of early pregnancies therefore it is not surprising that along with the decrease in natural pregnancy rate comes an age related increase in spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) rate. When one also considers that many spontaneous abortions occur before a woman even knows that she is pregnant it is easy to see why female age is a significant factor in the etiology of secondary infertility.

Less has been written about male age and fertility. Men, after all, normally go on producing new sperm throughout their adult life. Newer studies, however, have shown a decrease in both the quality and quantity of sperm produced by older men. Thus paternal age is no longer an insignificant factor to consider.

2. Couples Factor

One factor that occasionally contributes to the creation of a secondarily infertile couple is the introduction of a “new partner”. A female or male who has previously successfully conceived may become secondarily infertile with a new partner.

3. Pathology

Successful conception relies upon the production of healthy sperm and oocytes that meet and fuse in a supportive environment. Interruption of any step along this complex pathway may result in infertility.

In women, tubal blockage and abdominal adhesions are responsible about one third of the time for the diagnosis of infertility, ovulatory issues (anovulation, premature ovarian failure, ovulation irregularities) are responsible about 25% of the time though this, as previously mentioned, increases significantly with age and uterine factors (including endometriosis, a condition where uterine tissues are located outside of the uterus) are thought to be a contributing factor in approximately 30% of. Once again, it is important to remember that there may be multiple etiologies in the same couple and that many of these etiologies may develop after the first successful conception.

In men, acquired defects in spermatogenesis, blockage in the semen delivery system and impotence are the primary contributing factors to infertility. Some of the causes of these problems are relatively reversible and easy to correct others less so.

Good luck to you, I hope this helps.

Answer 2

I am sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage my first pregnancy at 8 weeks. The good news is that you can get pregnant, and if you had only been trying since May '06, then you conceived pretty quickly. My husband and I had been ttc since the same time and we didn't conceive until Dec'06. My OB couldn't understand why I wasn't getting pregnant because I had been ovulating. I went to see a fertility specialist that month, but thankfully I conceived and don't have to go through anymore testing or procedures like IVF. Since you also have a 2 year old, I would say you are probably worrying for nothing, but it doesn't hurt to see a specialist. I'm wondering if just knowing I was going to see a specialist helped take some pressure off of us. I took progesterone through my first trimester with my daughter, who was my second pregnancy, to help prevent miscarriage. I am taking it again with this pregnancy. I don't think you probably need it since you have a 2 year old already, but it might be worth asking your doctor about. We also had my husband's sperm retested just to make sure. He had it tested just before we conceived my daughter, so it had only been a couple of years. I wish you all the best.

Answer 3

First of all I'm so sorry for your loss, i have a family member who has had 3 miscarriages and i seen how hard it was for her, she nearly gave up hope, then she fell pregnant DEC 05 an now has a beautiful little boy! And don't be scared to go and see a specialist, if there isn't anything wrong with you, then that's great so they wont see it as wasting time they are there to help. And will always be able to tell you something. There are all sort of special herbs you can take to help fall pregnant naturally, you could ask your doctor about if your not sure which ones. if your still having no luck then there are other alternatives you could consider. You should also give your body time to rest after the loss of the baby, your body went through a lot. Don't forget It can take up to 2 years to conceive depending on age, so don't give up hope.

Answer 4

1. You NEED to see a doctor if you have concerns about fertility.
You could have something medically wrong, or you could just be putting too much pressure on yourself to conceive.
2. Your spouse may be having the issue, not you, therefore if your doctor gives you a clean bill of health, then have your spouse see a doctor.(Hopefully he will comply).
3. RELAX! Sometimes when we try to hard at something, it just doesn't work. Let nature take it's course.Whatever is meant to be will happen.
4. Maybe you were only suppose to have 1 child? No one can answer why things are the way they are, but if you were only intended to give birth once, maybe you should explore adoption if you want an addition to your family.
5. Hope this helps! And good Luck!

Answer 5

I don't really have any advice per say, but just wanted to tell you to hang in there! I have been in your shoes. I got pregnant very easily the first time - no problems, and a couple of years later I had two miscarriages. Then I became pregnant with twins!

Don't dispair ((hug)). If you miscarry again then you might want to request that your progesterone levels be checked, but a single miscarriage is unfortunately not too uncommon. Just relax and try to go with the flow.

If you keep having trouble with the conceiving part then consult with your Dr. - secondary infertility is fairly common also. They may have some options for you to try. Good luck.

Answer 6

I am sorry for your loss....but the fact that you were successful on your own to get pregnant is a positive thing...i tried for 2.5 years to get pregnant. After one year, my husband and I starting going for tests to see if either of us had any problems. We were doing tests for well over a year, and the problem was mainly with the mobility of my husband's fellas. We had come to accept the fact that we were going to go for our first procedure in Feb 07, and upon returning from a vacation, we found out we were pregnant on our own. So many people told us that when you least expect it, it will happen, or to just relax, etc. it's hard to listen to, but i really believe now that we are pregnant, that the reason it did happen was because we didn't think about it anymore. so I think you should really take some time for yourselves (go away if you can), and not stress over it. the body does truly need to be relaxed to conceive. but it doesn't hurt to go for tests (blood, etc) to ease your minds.

Answer 7

Well first off, im sorry to hear of your previous loss, Sometimes God has special plans for your life, and though they are hard to understand trust me when i say he knows what he is doing. You were blessed with a 2 year old so we all know its not impossible :) So KEEP that in mind. My husbands co worker and her hubby went through fertility treatments for 15 years, they now have 3 beautiful healthy children......If you desire to have children, dont fight that urge head to a specialist and let them help you figure out whats going on, maybe its something simple :) Goodluck and ill pray for you and your family!

Answer 8

It has not been over 12 months yet, so they say to try for up to 12 months before seeing a specialist! You can get a reg. obgyn to give you clomid! It got my friend pregnant the first month on it! Good luck!

Answer 9

It is hard not to make this a priority but try to relax about it. Trying too hard can be your undoing. Try saying a prayer or two it helps you feel more relaxed and might give you the little one you want.

One child can be wonderful too. Try to enjoy yourself and your 2 year old and things always seem to work out for the best no matter how much we worry, plan and strife.

Answer 10

Have you had your thyroid checked lately? Lots of women get thyroid problems after having kids; and, if the thyroid is not working properly can lead to you not being able to conceive. Plus, it takes a woman's body to time to heal after childbirth...like 2 yrs. So, keep trying and fun doing it!!! Plus, I would see the specialist too!!! Good luck!!